你知道的

A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store.
一个女人在去上班的路上看到在一个宠物店前有只鹦鹉站在树枝上。
The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious!
鹦鹉向她说：“嘿，女士，你真的很丑。”女人感到有点生气。
She stormed past the store to her work.
她怒气冲冲地接着去上班了。
On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." She was incredibly ticked now.
在回家的路上她再一次看到了那只鹦鹉，而那只鹦鹉又说道：“嘿，女士，你真的很丑。”她现在感到非常生气了。
The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
第二天这只鹦鹉又对她说：“嘿，女士，你真的很丑。”
The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird. The store manager replied profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot didn't say it again.
女人暴怒地走进了宠物店说她要起诉这家宠物店，要求杀死这只鸟。店员一遍又一遍地道歉并保证他绝对不会让鹦鹉再这么说了。
When the lady walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey lady."
当女人再次下班回家的时候鹦鹉又叫道：“嘿，女士。”
She paused and said, "Yes?"
她停下脚步问：“然后呢？”
The bird said, "You know."
这只鹦鹉说：“你知道的。”

谁的儿子最伟大

The mothers of four priests got together and were discussing their sons. "My son is a monsignor," said the first proud woman. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Monsignor'."
四位牧师的母亲聚到一起谈论她们的儿子。“我的儿子是个教士，”第一位母亲自豪地说道，“他进入房间，人们都说，‘您好，阁下’。”
The second mother went on, "My son is a bishop. When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Excellency'."
第二位母亲说：“我的儿子是位主教。他进入房间，人们都称，‘您好，大人’。”
"My son is a cardinal." continued the next one. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Eminence'.
“我的儿子是位红衣主教，”第三位母亲接着说，“他走进房间，人们都说，‘您好，尊敬的主教大人’。”
"The fourth mother thought for a moment. "My son is six-foot-ten and weighs 300 pounds, " she said. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Oh, my God'!"
第四位母亲略思片刻。“我的儿子身高六英尺十，体重三百磅，”她说，“他要是走入房间，人们都说‘哦，我的上帝’！”

善良的男人

A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
一天，一个男人和他的朋友正在当地的高尔夫球场打球。当他正准备切球时，看见一支长长的送葬队伍沿着道路方向走来。他的手刚摆到一半，立刻停下来，脱下他的高尔夫球帽，闭上眼睛，深深的鞠躬并默默祈祷。
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
他的朋友看了说：“喔喔，这是我见过最体贴最感人的事了。你真是个善良的男人。”
The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years."
那个男人然后说，“是啊，怎么说我们也结婚35年了。”