Three very tough mice  （源自：啊哈笑话网）
Three rats are sitting at the bar talking bragging about their bravery and toughness.

The first says, "I'm so tough, once I ate a whole bagful of rat poison!"

The second says, "Well I'm so tough, once I was caught in a rat trap and I bit it apart!"

Then the third rat gets up and says, "Later guys, I'm off home to harass the cat."

         三只勇敢的老鼠    （译文：牛筋）

三个老鼠在酒吧谈话，各自炫耀自己有多么勇敢。

第一个老鼠说，“我多么勇敢啊，有一次，我吃了一整袋的老鼠药。”

第二个老鼠说，“我更厉害了，有一次，我被老鼠夹夹住了，我硬是把鼠夹给咬开了。”

第三个老鼠站起来说，“好了，不和你们谈了，我要出门去调戏那只猫了。”

    The preacher buys a parrot（源自：啊哈笑话网）

A preacher is buying a parrot.

"Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.

"Oh absolutely. It's a religious parrot," the storekeeper assures him.

"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord's prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."

"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"

"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.

      牧师买鹦鹉   （译文：牛筋）

一位牧师在买鹦鹉。

“你保证它不会尖叫，吼叫，诅咒吗？”牧师问。

“哦，绝对不会。它是一只虔诚的鹦鹉。”店主人保证说。

“你看到它那两只腿上绑的绳子了吗？如果你拉它右腿上的绳子，它就会背诵上帝祷文；如果拉左腿上的绳子，它就会唱第23首圣歌。”

“好极了！”牧师说，“可是如果同时拉两条腿上的绳子会怎么样呢？”

“那我肯定会从我的栖息处掉下来了，你这个愚蠢的傻瓜！”鹦鹉大声尖叫道。