学生译文：When in my twenties, I was only willing to date boys from sports or art department. After thirty, I even thought I had been an idiot before.

    改译：At the age of twenty, I did long to date with the boys from either physical education or the art department. After thirty, it seems so unbelievable that I once idiotically possessed that thought.

点评：除了不善使用英语词汇的转义之外，对英语词汇的构词的灵活性，我们只是局限于学习，至多是欣赏的层次上，在翻译中如何加以活用，我们也考虑较少。比如原句出现了“白痴”二字，译者只是照搬，将它译成idiot。译idiot固无不可，但是，若使用其副词形式（idiotically），岂不更佳？因为，它不仅显现一种暗示美，而且还折射了别样的强调意味。

    6） 二十岁的时候，有书店必逛，有书必买。三十岁之后，对书店视而不见，直接去了隔壁的美容院。

    学生译文：At the age of twenty, I frequented the bookstores and bought whatever I found. After thirty, I ignored them and went ahead into the nearby beauty parlor.

改译：At the age of twenty, bookstore was a must for me, and I was a big book buyer. While after thirty, paying no attention to the bookstore, I breeze into the beauty parlor next door.

    点评：美学心理学认为，语言表达精确和模糊既对立，又统一，各有各的审美价值。模糊，与精确一样，透现出一种美。如何通过模糊去获得精确美，是译者不能忘怀的。原句的“有书必买”译成bought whatever I found，似乎很精确，其实无“美”可言，甚至经不起逻辑的推敲。后译在译“有书店必逛，有书必买”时，用了两个“小词”： a must / big book buyer，既轻巧，又含糊，轻巧中透出幽默，含糊中体现了精确！

    另外值得一提的是，后译运用了动词breeze的转义，不仅动词本身很美，而且和名词beauty parlor构成了和谐美，其效果非went ahead into可比。