注:老大今年上小学五年级,要毕业了.暑假过后就要到另一个学校开始中学的生涯.老师让班上的学生给低年级的同学写写自己五年级生活的的感想,有点临别赠言的性质.下面就是老大写的"赠言",让我帮忙打印出来.儿子说,他的这篇作文老师给了A.看完后我笑得眼泪都快流出来了.想想要是我小时候拿这样的东西交给老师,估计除了被给不及格之外,可能还得让家长到学校去谈谈我的思想问题的.....

随便翻译如下.原文附在后面.

对四年纪学生的警告

Alex Song

在你进入恐怖的五年级的大门之前，你应该至少了解一些五年级的恶梦，诸如：演讲蟒蛇，作文妖怪，和可怕的家庭作业魔鬼．我打赌你不会喜欢遇见它们．

也许五年级所有恶魔之中最糟糕的之一就是演讲蟒蛇了．这条蟒蛇爱看到你每月一次站在全班面前做演讲．这些演讲中有的包括美国名人或是书籍销售，就是你不得不装着去卖书．这条蟒蛇不怎么友善，它绝对不会在意你是多么尴尬或是演讲多么困难．如果你有上台恐惧的话，那会让它更加高兴．还有，这些演讲会按照你的身体姿势，讲话音量，背诵好坏，还有很多其它东西来评分，让它变得更加困难．大多数时间，你还得购买道具帮你获得更好的成绩．天啊，你不觉得这条蟒蛇很可怕吗？

另一个拒绝让你走向六年级大门的野兽就是作文妖怪．这个作文妖怪随时都会出击，留下一串手臂酸疼的五年纪学生．这些作文枯燥，困难，会浪费太多的铅笔．更糟糕的是，你很难拿到Ａ的成绩．很多学生功课都能拿到Ａ，除了写作之外．作文妖怪就喜欢看到五年级学生因写作而受到折磨．

比演讲蟒蛇和作文妖怪更糟的是家庭作业魔鬼．有这样的魔鬼在你的功课夹里面游荡，你肯定会每天弄到很晚才能睡觉！每天老师会给你山堆一样的家庭作业，让这个魔鬼非常高兴．它也浪费了很多你可以用来玩电脑游戏或是做其它事情的时间．听说过＂作业第一＂这句话吗？多数父母都相信它，所以，你要是想在平时玩电子游戏，祝你好运！显然，作业魔鬼很麻烦．

现在你知道了五年级的一些恐怖的东西，小心，因为一旦学校最后一天的钟声响起，你可以肯定地知道，你进入了一个艰难的处境．你的脚步一旦踏入了五年级的教室，你知道，随时都会有鬼怪向你袭击．

Warning to 4^th Graders

Alex Song

Before you enter the horrible gates of 5^th grade, you should at least get to know some of the nightmares of 5^th grade: the Speech Serpent, the Essay Demon, and the terrifying Homework Devil. I’ll bet you wouldn’t like to meet them.

Probably one of the worst of all the monsters in 5^th grade is the Speech Serpent. This serpent loves to see you in front of the class saying a speech every single month! Some of the speeches include the Famous American report, and the “sell-a-book” speech, which is when you have to pretend to sell a book. This serpent is not a nice one; it definitely doesn’t care how embarrassed you are, or how hard it is. It makes him even happier if you have stage fright. Furthermore, the speeches are all graded on poise, volume, memorization, and many other things, which make it even harder! Most of the time you will have to buy props just to get a better grade! Boy oh boy, isn’t that serpent terrible?

Another one of the beasts refusing to let you to the gates of 6^th grade is the Essay Demon. The demon of essays can strike at any time, leaving behind a trail of sore handed 5^th graders. These long essays are also boring, difficult, and also wastes too much lead! Even worse, it is tremendously hard to get As. Many of the students have As except in writing. The Essay Demon just likes to see 5th graders get tortured by writing essays.

     Even worse than the Speech Serpent and the Essay Demon is the Homework Devil. With this devil haunting your homework folder, you will be sure to stay up late every night! Every day the teachers assign you mountains of homework, and that all makes the devil happier. It also wastes a lot of time which you could have spent playing video games or something else. Ever heard of the saying, “Homework first”? Well, most parents believe in that, so good luck in trying to play video games on a weekday! Obviously, that Homework Devil is trouble!

Now that you know about some of the horrors of 5^th grade, beware, for once the school bell rings at the last day of school, you know for sure you’re in a tough situation. Once you step foot in a 5^th grade classroom, you now know a monster can strike you at any time.