本篇收集的是我在北外青少“学术英语”课程中孩子们（初二）的第一篇作文的第二稿（原稿，仍然有很多错误，请批评性阅读），作文的题目是让孩子们阅读了英国卫报中关于对2012年PISA考试中国上海再次全球夺冠后一篇评论（作者认为如果美国学校参照中国上海学校的模式，那将是噩梦，问孩子们的观点），Shanghai's model would be a nightmare for US schools. Do you agree or disagree with the writer's opinion?

熟悉雅思写作评判标准的老师们，欢迎给孩子的作品打分！

Essay 1

Recent events suggested that Shanghainese model students possess the ability to achieve skillful command of the subjects assessed in various testing systems. However, the reality and recess of Chinese education system turn out to be a different situation. Generally, I believe that Shanghai education is a nightmare for American schools and it is essential for American schools to adopt a different approach that fits their own situation.

Despite the rumors, the aim of Shanghai education is to gain access to higher education through test-taking. Such aim emphasizes excessive memorization and overwhelming routine practice, and rejects diversity, physical training and interests. As a result, with seeming intelligence, Shanghai students may do poorly in critical thinking, interest fostering, or even daily surviving skills. The disadvantage of this is self-evident. Moreover, a considerable amount of schools are renowned of its “fundamental elitism” and therefore introduced “elite student policy” for commercial benefits. Having this misconception existed, the schools deprive the opportunities of the less intelligent. Carrying out the policy in America may well be the loss of equality, not to mention the failure in humanity and morality.

Nevertheless, some skeptics argue that being lack of strict control, the freedom of American education has evolved into inferiority that leads to decent in American education. I suppose this is not the issue. American education should encourage sensible diligence as well as critical thinking, rather than blindly imitating Shanghai education that may diminish the potential of pupils.

Overall, I agree that Shanghainese model is a nightmare for American schools since Chinese education system proves to be inappropriate and devastating. The authority should take other factors that deteriorate American education into consideration and make improvements in accordance with the reality of the situation.

Essay 2

Shanghai reached No.1 on the Programme for International Student Assessment (PISA) 2012 ranking list, surpassing the superpower U.S, who dropped to the 36th place. While numerous American experts and  educators argued that the Chinese model is basically a medieval exam-based nightmare, others consider it applicable. Meanwhile, my thesisis that this issue should neither be oversimplified as a nightmare nor be a replacement of current systems.

Americans may find the exam-based approach that may be the major contribution to the astonishing result of the Chinese students in PISA unimaginable. Admittedly, this method, which was designed to cater for the  insufficient educational resources per person in China, has major limitations. Starting before the pre-school period, Chinese students are forced to compete with peers throughout five major exam campaigns before they can gain access to the university. This pressure ultimately leads to millions of test-taking experts doing basic clerical works while the vital skills to survival such as .... are ignored.

The excessive emphasis on the dark side of the Chinese system seems unreasonable. What should not be forgotten is that the guarantee of literacy and free elementary education to China’s vast population is based on this “medieval” system. This system provided chances for the groups that may be unable to receive further education by ensuring educational equality throughout examinations. It might not be perfect, but it particularly suits the Chinese context.

Hence, the Chinese education system should not be oversimplified as a nightmare but a special mechanism in correspondence to a unique society.

Essay 3

Shanghai’s education model, after topping the PISA rankings, has raised a trans-Pacific argument – should America introduce such model or not? In my opinion, Shanghai’s model would not be suitable for US schools, nor would it be a nightmare.

First, Shanghai’s model usually assesses students through testing – a seemingly efficient method to examine a student’s knowledge ad analysis skills. Unfortunately, creativity and critical thinking might not be assessed through this method and therefore receives less emphasis, which leads to possible imbalance in education. Second, Shanghai’s model is considered as “fundamental elitism”. Excellent students are awarded often, while poor students are easily ignored and abandoned. Finally, Shanghai’s model does not always tolerate diversity. Students are often forced to concentrate on conformed schoolwork and the development of their hobbies and talents are discouraged.

A “nightmare”, however, should not be recognized as an accurate description of Shanghai’s model. In other words, learning from Shanghai’s model would be beneficial in some circumstances. The model’s focus on discipline, for example, is an efficient way of organizing students and preventing them from teenage riots.

Shanghai’s model has limited advantages and therefore a complete imitation of it in the US should be reconsidered. Perhaps, through self-criticizing and innovation, an ideal education system for both nations would be developed.

Essay 4

Since Shanghai students gained the highest mark in 2012 PISA, it is generally agreed that people in other countries, especially the Americans begin to apply an alternative point of view on Shanghai’s education system. In spite of the advantages students receive from Shanghai’s schools, it is evident that the American education is beneficial for students as well, so I strongly believe that finding the neutral way between both of them is extremely essential.

The fact is that it is unnecessary to focus only on examinations as the schools in Shanghai would commonly do. For example, simply memorizing literature to pass exams is not recommendable, while the American schools teach students how to think critically and work creatively. In addition, as a result of tutoring students to be ultra-egocentric due to excessive amount of examinations, most students in Shanghai have inadequate collaborative and communicative skills  which would affect severely on those students’ social lives in the future.

However, the Americans cannot judge Shanghai’s education system against only one criterion as the benefits of Shanghai’s methods must not be overlooked. For instance, the schools in Shanghai may possibly gain the recognition of bringing up capable and intelligent generation because of the extreme amount of knowledge and skills taught  with exams. Moreover, setting exams regularly may contribute as a positive motive for students to obtain knowledge through revisions and it could encourage more success on students’ academic studies

In summary, I think the American schools should apply Shanghai’s education system selectively in correspond to their original education status quo. By integrating useful methods of study such as regular exams with revisions from Shanghai’s system with critical thinking, creativity and team-working from the American system is more likely to lead to more endeavors in the next PISA Report.

Essay 5

The astonishing fact that students from Shanghai became top of the Programme for International Student Assessment’s 2012 ranking list makes it a strongly arguable issue if US should adopt its model. Some strongly advocate for its application, while others firmly believe that Shanghai’s model would be a nightmare for US schools. In my opinion, Shanghai students could have a tremendous influenceon US students, but they might not be definite nightmares for US schools.

It is true that most of the Shanghai students are hard-working and ready for challenging educational missions. Furthermore, they have skills in memorizing tests and calculating. In addition, they tend to be realistic when they are dealing with study issues. To this extent, the US students are less skillful than the Shanghai students, and may recognize them as ‘nightmares’.

On the other hand, Shanghai student’s hard-working could also be their weakness. The primary reason is that they tend to spend excessive time dealing with repeated mathematical problems as well as reciting literatures. Consequently, most of them are not creative. By comparison, US students are especially good at identifying problems and creating new things. As a result, US students’ critical thinking skills can be a model for the Shanghainese students.

Overall, I think that both Chinese students and US students have their advantages in studying, so we should not be so concerned about the difference between them. Maybe it is better for them to learn from each other and to overcome their weaknesses, which will benefit both of them.