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Differences in Table Manners between America and China

 

I.  Introduction

As a Chinese saying goes, “people take food as their first need”. With the development of the society, both eastern and western countries have formed their own table manners. As China and America are representative countries of western and eastern, I take these two as examples to illustrate the differences among eastern and western countries.

In order to make a specific study on the differences in table manners between these two countries, this thesis will compare differences in manners from different aspects: the preference of their choice of table and tableware, the useage and the rule of the tableware, the implied meaning ect.. Then the paper analyses the causes of these differences from different angles, such as productivity, history, characters of the nation.

To a large extent, table manners are the reflection of culture. The mastery of table manners will facilitate the future communicators in the process of their cross-cultural contact.

 

II． Choice of Table and The Arrangement of Seats

A. Choice of Table and The Arrangement of Seats

 In China, people would like to choose round table. On the round table, everyone sits around the table to enjoy the same dish from one plate. In Chinese tradition, people view left higher than right. It is manifested in the seat arrangement. Furthermore, the older are regarded as the honor and should be arranged to the left of the host. However, with time going, nowadays things change, so does the view of position. It does not only inherit the tradition, but also use some views of western countries as reference. The guest should be arranged to the right of the host (http://space.goiee.com). As it is shown in diagram1-2, the guest will be arranged on the right of the host. The more important the guest is, the shorter distance the guest away from the host or hostess is. The major guests should be arranged to the seats facing the door of the room.

In America, they tend to use the rectangular table. Just as what has been mentioned above, they regard right higher than left. Usually, they place name cards on the table to tell the guests where their seats are. If there aren’t any cards, the host will lead the way for their guests and the hostess should be the last one following the guests to go into the dinning room. All men present shouldn’t have their seats until the hostess sits down. Husbands and wives are separated to sit like the letter ＂x＂, as it is shown in the diagram 1-1.

B. The Implied Meaning

Chinese prefer the round table, since in Chinese opinions, round symbolizes reunion. On the table people can talk face to face with anyone. Moreover, round table can accommodate more people. Because Chinese like inviting guests as many as possible.  

In America people respect privacy and individuality, thus choosing a rectangular table leave a lot of space for their personal space. What’s more, husband and wife are separated. In so doing, people get more chance to make acquainted with others. It is more convenient for intercourse.

 

III.  Choice of Tableware and Manners on Table

A. The Way in China

1. The Origin and Use of Chopsticks

  We use chopsticks, bowl, scoop, plate on the table. To begin with, most people concern about the origin of the chopsticks. There are different stories about the chopsticks.

Chopsticks have already used for at least for 3000 years in China. In Qin dynasty, we called the chopsticks “zhu”. Because it sounded like Chinese word “zhu”( in Chinese it means stop), the Chinese word “kuai”take place of “zhu”(kuai means quick), so today people call the chopsticks “kuai zi”.(Li,73)  In Chinese history ,there was a man called “yu”, who was a hero fight against the flood. One day he came to an island and felt very hungry, and then he cooked the meat by himself. Yu didn’t want to waste time to wait until the meat in the pot to be cool, for he hurried on controlling the flood. So he used two sticks to pick up the meat from the pot to eat. Since then people began to use these two sticks to pick up the food from the plate. (Long,18).

   The rule to use the chopsticks is what we Chinese mostly emphasis. We usually hold the chopsticks with the right hand, while the position we hold should either be on the top or at the bottom. Though it is only two sticks, many manners and contraindications have shaped.

·It means you will be poor in your whole life when you knock at the bowl with the chopsticks.

·The chopsticks can not be inserted in the bowl vertically.(It means you are worshiping the dead)

·Do not put the different chopsticks in use which are made of varied materials and of different colors.

·Do not put chopsticks on the bowl after dinner.

·You are not allowed to hold the chopsticks around all the dishes to arouse others’ attention while you don’t pick up anything.

·You can not hold the chopsticks with your forefinger pointing to others.

·Do not use the chopsticks to pick up food in the soup.

·Do not hold the chopsticks unevenly, for we call it “san chang liang duan” (in Chinese it means misfortune)

However, one of the phenomenon that make foreigners surprised is that some people like to use their own chopsticks to pick up food for their honored guests. This is a sign of genuine friendship and hospitality.

There is a Chinese saying: “people become polite after they are rich in material.” After civilization, some usages of chopsticks are reflections of our traditional culture. The chopsticks often view as the mascot in wedding.

In Shanxi province, when a new couple gets married, the parents of the bride will take the red chopsticks to the bride as a gift in hope that the new couple can lead a happy life. (The pronunciation of chopstick in Chinese sounds like happy). In Bama yao autonomous county in Guangxi, parents give their daughters ten pairs of chopsticks and nine other living goods as trousseau. The meaning lying it is, firstly ,they wish the new couple can be as close as the ten fingers ,secondly, ten kinds of living goods and ten pairs of chopsticks form two tens(in China it means everything will go well). In Jiangning , Nanjing ,people sing a song in the wedding ceremony “kuai zi kuai zi, kuai sheng gui zi, kuai zi fei yang, zi sun man tang, kuai zi luo di, zhuang yuan ji di.”(It means that bride and bridegroom will have kids soon and their family will soon spread. Moreover, their generations will bring honor to their ancestors) (Long, 18-20)

As have illustrated above, in the long run of civilization, Chinese embody the chopsticks many implied meanings with different usages in different occasions. In wedding they are regarded as mascot, while in funeral they are viewed as worship the dead if they are inserted in the bowl straightly .So do not misuse the chopsticks.

 

2. The Use of Bowl

People in China has used bowl to eat since the New Stone Age. The bowl is used to ladle rice, soup, and food. We often use ceramic bowl in green and in white. Chinese don’t like using the bowl with broken edge. For there is a story about that, before the convict was sentenced to death, he would drink wine and broke the bowl shouting: “I will be a hero in 18 years.” (http://space.goiee.com)

Bowl is an important tableware in China. Because they are convenient for personal use no matter in south of China where Chinese take rice as their main food, or people in north where eat noodles and dumplings.

 

3. The Order of Dishes

Chinese dishes always start with four cold dishes, to be followed by the main courses of hot meat and vegetable dishes. Soup then will be served to be followed by the staple food ranging from rice, noodles to dumplings. If you wish to have your rice to go with other dishes, you should say so in good time, for most of the Chinese choose to have the staple food at last or have none of them at all. (http:// zhidao.baidu.com)

People sit around the table and share dishes picking up the food from the same plate. What’s more, Chinese always position guests higher than themselves, and often “worry about what others worry, and think about what others think”, so they treat themselves as servers to serve their guests whole-heartedly. Every dish served on the table has cooked with spice elaborately. When cooking they pursue the harmony among the color, taste, fragrance. Most importantly, Chinese strive for ostentation and extravagance, and don’t like losing faces. Thus the host often invite hundreds of people and prepare more dishes and drinks than the guest can eat.

 

B. The Way in America

The tableware in America on the table is like the figure2-1.

 

Digram2-1

1. Knife and Fork

Americans place the knives on the right and forks on the left, the knife edge are inward. The smaller knives and forks are on the front of plate. You should use them from outward to inward according the dishes the host offered. There are two forks on the left side; the bigger one is for dinner, while the smaller is for dessert or salad. On the right side, the dentate knife is dinner knife, which is for steak, chops, chicken and so on. The other one is butter knife.

It is said that the westerns used knife for dinner only. With the development of the society, they invented forks. The knife doesn’t only for dinner but also for hunting, slaying, cutting the prey, but also protecting them. The earliest fork only has two dents which were to help cut the food into pieces. Before the 15th century, people in the west used hands instead of the knife, for at that time people regarded fork as decadent and evil thing. (Bruce, 12-13)

In general, in the west people hold the knife with our right hand and fork with left, however, in America people cut the food into pieces at a time, then they put down the knife on the plate and eating with the fork on the right hand.

 

2. Other Tableware

 Two spoons are on the right of the knives, and the near one is for desert, the other for soup.

 Napkins are placed in the center of the plate, and they will be put on the left side if the first dish is served before the guests having their seats. You can use the napkin only after everyone has their seats, moreover, napkin usually put on the thigh. The main functions of the napkin are to keep the clothes clean, wipe your mouth, cover the mouth if you are embarrassed, for instance, you can cover your mouth with it to pick teeth in case something is in the teeth. It is impolite to use it to wipe your nose. Besides ,in the formal occasions the napkin has some implicit meanings: the west people abide by “ladies first”, if hostess sits down and put the napkin on the thigh, it signals the beginning of the dinner, on the contrary, if hostess put the napkin on the table, it signals the dinner have finished.

Candles are necessary on the table in the formal dinner in America. They are likely to place the candles as single number. They use the candlesticks to insure that the candles are high enough not to block the eyes. They can be in any color as long as they work well with the settings.

There are different kinds of wine glasses on the table, such as water goblet, champagne glasses, claret glasses (red wine glasses or white wine glasses), and sherry glasses. They are placed the bigger after the smaller on the table according to their sizes. Ladies should be careful enough not to leave the hickey on the glasses.

 

3. The Order of Dishes

 The order of the American dishes are caviar, smoked salmon for the appetizer plates , foie gras, soup, fish or meat, vegetable salad or cheese, desserts or fruit, and coffee or tea.

Americans eat with their own plate and can season the food on the plate with spice the host placed on the table. Moreover, they pay attention to characteristics of food of their own, thus they cook the vegetable and the meat separately rather than mix them together. Besides, they like cold dish because they think it can retain the original taste and flavor. Last but not least, they prepare the dishes accordingly and they don’t like extravagance and waste.

 

C. The Implied Meaning

Chinese views eating as collective thing. In China, it is a sign to show respect when people put the chopsticks on the right of your bowl and wait for leaving after meals until all the people finish and the host and hostess leave the table.

 However, things are totally different in America. Americans respect individuality and equality. Moreover, different placements of forks and knives have different meanings. ( diagram 3-1) When you have a rest or talk with others, you put the forks and knives like Chinese character eight. If you finish the dish, you put the forks and knives together. Putting them in the same line in the plate means that you have finished the meal.

 

Diagram3-1

IV.  Choice of Drinks

A. Choice of Drinks in China

  China has a long history about drink. Someone said that in Xia dynasty a man called Yi Di invented wine, while others considered it is Du Kang in Shang dynasty invented wine. In ancient China, people know much about should worship on bended knees during drinking with others. The junior can not drink until the older asks. If someone propose a toast to another person, both of them should stand up and leave the seats (in Chinese we call it “bi xi”). Most of time, to show respects the one who proposes a toast drinks the wine one breath. In Chinese Four Great Classical Novels, there are also many stories about the drink. In A Dream of Red Mansions mentioned people like playing drinkers’ wager game (xing jiu ling)? This game was born in Zhou dynasty which plays among the drinkers, to begin with, they will choose someone to make a poem or couplet impromptu, and then others will follow this poem or couplet in the same form and with the similar meaning. The one who can not follow will drink the wine for punishment. Another example is in The Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Liu Bei and Cao Cao drunk wine and talked about the heroes. Cao Cao intended to figure out if Liu Bei want to be a hero. Liu Bei was too scared to drop his chopsticks for fear that Cao Cao knows his intention and tried his best to make Cao Cao believe that he was a mediocre person without any ambition. There are rice wine, liquor on the table, such as mian zhu, Gu Jin gong, er’guo tou etc..

 

 

B. Choice of Drinks in America

In America, there are different wines served during the meal, aperitif, tafelwein, dessert wine. In formal dinner, drink is also indispensable on the table of the west. Generally speaking, different dishes match different wines. People drink cocktail, champagne and Vermouth as aperitif. The dry wine and semi-dry wine will be served as tafelwein, while liqueur and brandy as dessert wine. When serve tafelweine the principle is that the claret should match beef, pork, and mutton, and white wine should match fish, chicken, sea food.

The server will do everything for you. They will twist the lid and pour the wine for you. You must drink all the wine in the goblet they serve and can not take back to the bottle, moreover, the bottle can not put on the table after they serve the wine. Last but not least, you should hold the goblet with three fingers but not in both hands. To bear in mind, you can not drink the wine in the goblet one breath which forms a contrast with in China.

 

C. The Implied Meaning

Wine is indispensable on the table both in China and America. But they focus on different aspects of manners on table.

Chinese pay much attention on etiquette. The host will serve the wine and hope their guests drink as much as possible. The more the guests drink the happier the hostess and host will be, since Chinese think it is the host’s duty to make the guests eat and drink as much as possible. They are so hospitable that it is hard to refuse to drink wine.

In America, people are particular about the drink. To make food and drink tasteful, they allocate drinks to different food. Every dish should go with the drink properly. If you drink the wine in the goblet one breath, the guest will think that you don’t enjoy wine or the wine is not tasteful enough.

 

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