After several days raining, the sun showed yesterday, but escapes today again.

I dislike the rainy days. However, in the spring season, if there is no raindrop, how could the flowers bloom with grass growing? When I think of the remarkable sunshine of Calgary, I can’t help smiling at once.

I am holding the application for leave of absence, hesitating, painting some characters and feeling it is hard to continue.

Standing on top of the onrush, like a stray bird, helpless, breathtaking, excited, curious, and scared, … It might be the most adored games for humanbeing! I always take the time and space as a enormous fruit machine casino, devour our lives and spit them out again and again.

Pink Floyed is singing Money Machine in the sound boxes, but the jangle of coins sounds so strained and strident.

All those faces going in the street, absentmindedly. What are they pursuing ?

Maybe I am not one of them. Nevertheless, what is the end of my mood? Is it curiosity, or a pursuer of risks? Or for the legendary freedom in the end of the world?

Or it may be, I know my fate already, or know it is impossible to find it, and due to this consciousness, I just kidding as caring nothing about the final! This is human, right? Many comment my essays are in a gloomy tone and there must be, something deep in sadness in my mind…… and actually? What is the truth?

Not only the human can be sorrow. All my words in grey, are just the signal of expression. Some essays of other people seem so happy and complacent, but their frame of mind is greyer than mne, downcaster than mine and more resentful than mine.

Some are ovlivious. Some are clinging.

Think of that, when you are the castaway on a sea, if you do not chase after the billow, you’ll be lashed forward no matter like it or not.

Since I am the straying, no way to escape, no chance to get out, and then, I prefer to go faster and more airily!



下了好几天的雨，昨天有了点太阳，今天似乎又阴了起来。

不喜欢下雨，但春天的大地，没有雨水的滋润的话，怎么能鲜花盛开、绿野葱葱呢？一想到卡城著名的猛烈日照和干燥天气，我就忍不住的高兴不已。

拿着请假条，写了几个字，却无法再写下去了，犹豫不决。

站在时间的洪流上，漂的感觉除了无助之外，惊险、刺激、新奇、恐惧、兴奋……这也许就是人类喜欢玩的游戏吧！常常觉得时间与空间有如一台巨大的老虎机，把我们吞进去，又择时吐出来。听着平克弗罗伊德（Pink Floyd）的Money Machine，钱币哗哗吐出的声音格外刺耳。

多少面孔，茫然随波逐流，他们在追寻什么？

我算是那些少数不茫然地随波逐流的人吧，那我这种心情的目的又是什么呢？是好奇，还是追求刺激？或传说中那虚无缥缈的自由？

又其实是，我本已知结局是未知的，或根本就不可知的，所以才妄谈什么不在乎结果只在乎过程吧！人也就只能这样了，对不？好多人说我的文字灰灰暗暗的，一定有什么巨大的悲伤藏在心中。事实上呢？

不是人才会悲伤的，那种灰灰暗暗的字眼儿，大部分是为了抒发而做一滴引子而已。有很多人的文字，都那么快乐，那么得意非凡，心情却比我灰暗的多，沮丧得多，愤懑得多，忧郁得多。我那点儿小伎俩，不过是种煽情的习惯吧！有如寒江宴雪所说，她自己写完就忘了。如果要我补充，我还会说，不但忘了，而且还忘的很彻底。

人的差别大概也在于此吧，有的人健忘，有的人执着。

昨天下午忽发灵感，正欲写篇惊天动地的文章——《论预言精神力的应用与意义》，被DON的一个短信打断了，就向他抱怨。他问我什么题目，如实告之，结果他就跟我讲一个女人勾结半仙谋杀亲夫的烂新闻……气的我发昏，甚至都能想象到他仰着明晃晃的光头笑的花枝乱颤的样子。

为什么研究精神力的人，总被当作是半仙呢？这恐怕也是一种滥用（abuse）的结果。人就这样，热衷于随波逐流啊！

不过想想看，身在茫茫大海上，反正你不逐流，海浪也是要把你往前送的，如果自己追逐一轮，也满有兴致的嘛。至少身不由己的感觉会比较容易被遗忘的。那些研究精神力的人们，是不是也不自觉地在走这一条路呢？

呵呵，既然都在漂了，也逃不过，那么，干脆就漂的更快一点，漂的更轻盈一点吧！