今天是一年一度的Children's Day。对于我们这群早就超龄的雅思托福老师而言，这种节日无非徒增伤悲...不过，为了不spoil节日的快乐气氛，今天的特别话题是“Jokes”！！很应景的说一句，long long ago，当我还是个小孩纸，学生时代最恶毒的英语考题无非“Point out why the joke is funny?”~ OMG!! 解释笑话笑点，seriously?? 这种事情，是不是nerdy的有点过分了呢？好吧，体谅一下英文念得不好的老师们，他们需要知道大家笑的原因...

其实哦，笑话好笑的原因很多，其中有一点就是英文单词的“一词多义”。神马意思呢？来举例说明吧：
A drunk guy approaches a cute girl in a singles bar. "Hi Babe, how about a date?" He says. "Don't waste your time. I never go out with a perfect stranger." "It seems we are both in luck. I'm far from perfect."

准备好了没？Next~
A rich man went to his lawyer and said “I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it.”The lawyer says “Don’t worry. Leave it all to me.”The man looks somewhat upset...“Well I knew you were going to take the biggest slice – but I'd like to leave a little to my children too!”

问题就出在“leave it all to me”这个短语上~ 律师的意思是“I can handle it for you（包在我身上，我来全权负责此事）”；富翁却理解成了字面的意思“财产全部留给我吧” 可怜的律师被冤枉成了贪婪的银...

A down-and-out musician was playing the violin in the middle of a big shopping mall. He had his violin case open so that passersby could drop in donations. Then a burly security guard marched over and asked him, "May I see your permit?" "I haven't got one," the musician confessed. "In that case you'll have to accompany me." "Splendid. What shall we sing?" 
这里，“accompany”对于保安大叔来说，意思是“go with（跟我走一趟局子吧）”，可爱的街头乐手，则默认为是“play music with”的意思~

A huge college freshman decided to try out for the football team. "Can you tackle?" asked the coach. "Watch this," said the freshman, who proceeded to run smack in to a telephone pole and completely knocked out it over. "Wow," said the coach, "I'm impressed. Can you run?" "Of course I can run," said the freshman. He was off like a shot, and in just over 9 seconds ran a 100-yard dash. "Great," the coach said. "But can you pass a football?" The freshman hesitated for a second. "Well, sir," he said, "If I can swallow it, I can probably pass it."
不好意思哦，这个笑话有点重口味了，嘿嘿 “pass”这个英文单词在足球运动中，指的是“to threw through the air（传球）”，而在生理学中，“pass”还有另一个意思，是“discharge（便便出来，额...）”

A medical student entered a patient's room carrying a syringe. As he approached the patient's bed, he said, "Just a little prick with a needle." "I know who you are," the patient relied, "but what are you going to do?"
这个笑话有点难度了吧？（Pls read it again）英文单词“prick”的本义是“a very small puncture of the skin（刺一下，扎一下）”，同时也可以指“a person regarded as comtemptile or obnoxious（被鄙视的人）”，所以病人以为这位医学院的高材生在说自己的人品差呢。

An erdly woman had two small terriers, one male, the other female. When the female terrier died, the male terrier was heartbroken, and he died the next day. She took the two carcasses to the taxidermist so that they could be preserved. The taxidermist asked, "Do you want them mounted?" She replied, "No, but could you have this paw in hers?"

对于制作动物标本的工人而言，“mount”的意思是“place on something raised, e.g.base or pedstal（安装在底座上）”，而老妇人却理解成了“to climb on top the other for copulation（攀爬在上面）”。

大脑有没有被“炸”掉？（英文里面如果用脑过度，就可以说“My brain is fried”。）最后一则笑话，又是关于法庭的。Are you ready?
A judge is addressing the husband in a divorce case. "Mr Johnson, I have reviewed this case carefully and I have decided to give your wife $2,000 a month." The husband replies, "That's very generous of you, your honor, and, believe me, I'll try to help out a little myself now and then."
在法官的语言中，“give”的意思是“award（判决授予）”，而这位老公却理解解成了“personally provide（私人提供）”。