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新聊斋之英国韦春花

(2009-12-31 14:25:20)
标签:

杂谈

http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/arts/2007/03/29/workinggirl460.jpg

近期因为中国司法系统处死英籍毒贩阿克毛(这名字翻译的,一听就是个毒贩子)而引发两国外交争端,两国媒体与民间人士也都挺身而出,各使王八牶绝招混战一通。

话说那英夷强盛了两百年,早已久富生惰,日渐破落,气数将尽,并无多少厉害法宝可以祭出,祖传武器如金融时报、经济学人、泰晤士报、卫报、每日电讯报、每日邮报、BBC等,以“国际舆论”为掩护,口沫横飞,暗箭四射,但我党和政府皮糙肉厚,尽可承受,英夷徒呼奈何。忽一日,夷营杀出一彪军伍,人欢马叫,脂粉漫天,莺声燕语,婉转呻吟。我先锋官肿喧部定睛一看,原是英国神女队伍,号称“性工作者”(Working girls). 那Working Girl边行边喊曰,尔华夏朝廷,上至士大夫下至一般豪绅,皆吾辈之恩客或潜在恩客也,如何不思一夜之情,骤起刀兵,刑我国人,辱我国威?我等虽陷风尘,报国不肯后人,自此立誓,誓约:凡汝中华来人,一年不得近我床第,亲我香闺,天上地下,上帝弥陀,此心可鉴,此志不夺,然香港台湾人士,自可网开一面。先锋听完,一时头晕目眩,回头便撤,急报大营主帅定夺。那帅帐里众官员思及英伦旖旎风光,美艳往事,亦惶惶颤颤,此事竟不知如何收场。

同史氏曰:昔韦小宝之母韦春花,自入青楼,阅人无数,中华男子,自达官贵人至贩夫走卒,但凡持金而来,皆以慈悲心肠,温柔手段,同金同爱,平等对待。然有爱国之志,立誓不侍外夷,凡高鼻深目之辈求欢,不论献金多少,皆以笤帚乱打以出。今英伦妓女,何异当年之韦春花?或曰一年时间苦短,然彼等亦有谋生之需,观者何苦吹毛求疵乎?

此地男子,多有侥幸之心,谓之坊间谣传,不可当真。然此事经英伦大报《每日电讯》刊登(见下),绝无虚假,我朝廷官员,如有英国之行,切切不可掉以轻心。在下一介草民,不足为肉食者谋,然年末无事,于此风轻云淡之时,斗胆建言,权作美芹之献

正是:神女生涯原是梦,不负当年韦春花


http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/georgepitcher/100020870/prostitute-boycotts-chinese-on-ethical-grounds/

George Pitcher

George Pitcher is Religion Editor of Telegraph Media. He is an Anglican priest and serves his ministry at St Bride's, Fleet Street, in London – the "journalists' church".

Prostitute boycotts Chinese on ethical grounds


By George Pitcher World Last updated: December 29th, 2009

127 Comments Comment on this article

One of the more touching messages I receive in the run-up to the outrageous execution of Akmal Shaikh in China this morning is from a London-based “working girl”, who tells me she is boycotting all Chinese clients for a year in protest.

Please, spare me any sanctimonious injunctions about her chosen way of life. She’s doing what she can. And how many business people have decided today to withdraw their services from the Chinese? I think, in this context at least, she is acting with great dignity and self-respect.

She writes:

Dear Father Pitcher,

I read your article on Akmal Shaikh with interest. It says the Chinese will face serious consequences if the execution goes ahead.

I don’t suppose you will find the following consequences serious, but I know some people who will..

[She then includes a link to her website]

That site is probably not worksafe if anyone is monitoring your internet usage, but it is my advert on [she includes an escort directory]. I am an escort. I’m boycotting Chinese passport holders for a year if the execution goes ahead. I can pick and choose my clients and I don’t need any from murderous regimes.

I’m in two minds about those from Hong Kong, but will allow Taiwanese.

[She then signs with what I take to be a real name, followed by her working name. I include neither here because, at the time of writing, I don't have her permission.]

I love that equivocation over Hong Kong. On her website, not yet updated after Mr Shaikh’s execution,  she adds:

Incidentally, if you are the holder of a Chinese passport you had better get your booking in tonight. After Akmal Shaikh, the mentally ill man, is executed tomorrow – you are on short rations for a year! In fact, no rations at all. Diu lai no mo hai, far as I’m concerned.

Could someone translate that Chinese for me? I reply to her as follows:

Dear [.....],

Good for you! I think that’s a highly principled stand – and I think that if everyone similarly did what they could by way of trade sanctions then we might make some progress with the Chinese.

Thanks for writing and have a very happy New Year.

And I mean it. The whole exchange is strangely uplifting and I’m really glad she wrote to me. Bless you, [consider your name here], GP


网上的简单翻译:

中国不顾英国政府抗议,将处死英国公民Akmal Shaikh(阿克毛)的消息传出之后,一位英国伦敦的妓女高调宣布:如果中国真的处死了阿克毛,她将在一年内拒绝接待持有中国护照的嫖客,但台湾护照的中国人不在抵制范围内,对香港护照持有者会区别对待。

  英国外交部次官刘易斯(Ivan Lewis)就曾经公然威胁中国说:“我不会只作出装腔作势的威胁。”。英国妓女的威胁也可能就是刘易斯所指的实质威胁的一种吧。

  George Pitcher是《每日电讯报》的宗教栏目编辑兼英国圣公会的牧师。他一直在自己的博客上发表针对中国强硬的文章。他最近收到一封令他十分感动的妓者来信。并将其公布在自己的博客上。信中大意是:

  我最近以极大的兴趣阅读了你有关阿克毛的文章(指George Pitcher的文章)。你的文章说,如果中国执行了死刑,中国将面临严重后果。

  我知道你不会觉得下面的后果很严重,但某些人会这么认为。

  我决定,如果中国政府真的对阿克毛执行了死刑,我将在一年内拒绝接待持有中国护照的客人。我可以选择我自己的顾客,我不欢迎那些来自杀戮成性的国度的人。但我会区别对待来自香港的客人,来自台湾的仍然被允许(成为顾客)。

  如果你是中国人,你最好今天晚上就赶紧预约我的时间,有精神病的毒贩阿克毛在明天被处决后,你将在一年内失去(成为我顾客的)机会。一点机会都没有。 我关心的就是对你说:Diu lai no mo hai (编辑注:脏话,也就是“丢你老母”的意思。看来该妓女的中国客人很多。)

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