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雅思作文题目：剑桥11 Test4大作文

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

考生原文

As the development of cities, it is hard to decide put which part of society to the first place. Governments hold that economy plays a leader role in cities’ development, whereas some citizens insist that other types of progress are also significant. In my opinion, I agree with the later argument.

Many governments may think that only having prosperous economy can keep the society peaceful and stable. It is because strong economy can make sure that almost every resident has basic income and enjoys some welfare from governments. However, if economy suffers depressions, the living qualities of citizens will decrease, which will cause people lose a sense of happiness. The worst result is that the number of criminals will increase, having a detrimental impact on the stability of society and the safety of residents.

On the other hand, some people who believe developing other kinds of progress are also necessary, as our country and some cities do not suffer economic severe problems which provide an appropriate social environment to construct other areas, such as educational institutions which can access more people to attain the opportunity to acquire knowledge. More importantly, it is education that can make young generations who are the successors of our country more competitive and knowledgeable. Also, it is essential for government to pay attention to the medical system. If getting great medical care, residents will more healthy and positive, which can help them improve concentration on working and studying. Basing on physical and mental health, people are able to devote themselves to contributions to society, which also can boost economy.

Overall, without strong economy or progress in other fields, our society can not operate smoothly. In my mind, government should keep a good balance between developments of all areas.

批改 by 牛亚茹老师

本次批改严格按照IELTS大作文评分标准进行。IELTS大作文评分项：
TR (题目回应程度), CC (连贯性及一致性), GRA (语法范围及精准度), LR (词汇资源)。
文末会进行总评及打分。

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总评分5.5分（TR5.5  CC6  GRA5.5  LR5.0）

1. 论述逻辑和段内结构有待提高
2. 总体结构相对较为完整，逻辑流畅度总体问题不大，句子和段落间的流畅、连接性良好
3. 内容上表达基本准确，但应注意个别语句的语序
4. 用词搭配需注意，避免中式英文表达
5. 句式变化上略显格式化，句式变化不够

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晟睿的老师团队们将根据你的作文批改情况，为你详细回答这几个问题：
1.你的四项分数是多少
2.你写的文章是否符合雅思问题的要求
3.你的Task1或Task2结构对不对
4.你的词汇量在band几的范围
5.你的段落连贯性和句子连接度顺畅吗
6.文章是否达到了雅思考试中需要的高分逻辑思维
7.你的语法对你那作文分数的影响有多大

往期回顾
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