Losing Face and Keeping One’s Word in China

面子的问题

The Chinese are very conscious of face. Face is essentially respect in a community and is a crucial underpinning of society. Loss of that respect threatens the relations of individuals with almost everyone in his or her world and is hard to get back once lost, and thus must be avoided at all costs.

Face is called "mianzi" in mandarin, which can also be translated to mean “dignity, prestige and reputation.” It has been said that "face is more important than truth or justice." Losing face is often people's worst fear. Chinese go out of their way to be polite and accommodating, to maintain dignity in a variety of situations and avoid disputes, conflicts and embarrassment in their pursuit to avoid losing face.

face 在中文里面是面子的意思。中国人觉得面子比什么都重要。千万不能丢脸，为了维护面子可能要说不由衷的话。

The government often uses social pressure in the form of face-losing criticism to keep people in line on issues such as having extra children or complaining about the government (the threat of imprisonment is also used).

Maintaining face and avoiding losing face are important concepts in the West. But as Scott Seligman, author of Chinese Business Etiquette, Manners and Culture in the People’s Republic of China told the New York Times, “The Chinese raise face to a high art. It’s a fragile commodity in China that can easily be lost....The trigger doesn’t have to be extreme. You can contradict somebody in front of someone who is lower ranking and cause that person to lose face. Even the simple act of saying no to somebody can make that person lose face.”

Chinese also value loyalty and stress the importance of keeping one's word. Discretion is greatly valued. It is tied with humility and not causing others to lose face.

Shyness, Modesty and Embarrassment in China

中国人的害羞 谦虚

Chinese often appear shy and self conscious to Westerners, especially when they are around foreigners or are in situations which they are not used to. Chinese don't like to be separated from crowd, （中国人是群居动物，一点都不假）stared at or asked too many personal questions (even though they often stare at and ask personal questions of Westerners).

但是中国人还喜欢问很私人的东西哦。

关于中国人的笑

Chinese often smile or giggle when a sensitive subject is broached or they feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. When young Chinese are asked if they have a girlfriend they usually laugh and look away. Chinese often grin（咧嘴笑） when something bad has happened. Laughing loudly is often a sign of uneasiness. The writer Peter Hessler described the “the Chinese grin of embarrassment” as “the kind of expression that make your pulse quicken.” Many Chinese will give a broad smile when they make eye contact with a stranger and then frown when they look away.

Chinese generally don’t express their feelings very well. The American-born Taiwan-raised film director Bertha Bay-Sa Pan told the New York Times, “The Chinese are not very expressive. We don’t tend to say, ‘I love you,’ even to our families, and we’re not physically affectionate.” At the same time some Chinese can be very self-deprecating（自嘲）. It is not unusual for a man to introduce himself as “Hu, a silly old pig.”

中国人在敏感的时候喜欢笑，来缓解紧张，窘迫等等。中国人当着人面笑，背后却皱眉。但是中国人不善于表达，不善于肢体的接触，他们比较害羞。中国人也不会像美国人那样，随时随地的自嘲。

Successful Chinese are often very modest. Most of China’s super rich are publicity-shy. They rarely grant interviews and little is known about them. When they do talk they tend to talk more about their $2 haircuts than lavish possessions. Perhaps they are reminded of the old Chinese proverb: Fame portends trouble for men, just as fattening does a pig.

成功的中国人是非常谦逊的，绝大部分富豪在公众场合都是很谦逊的。因为在中国有句谚语，人怕出名猪怕壮。

Formality, Punctuality and Apologizing in China 礼节 守时 道歉

Chinese tend to be very formal and have an us versus them attitude towards outsiders. Their formality persists until one is allowed on the inside of their group, which is something that usually takes place over time and requires following established protocol and recognizing hierarchies and showing proper respect to achieve.

中国人是很有礼貌的，对待外人更是如此。

Apologizing is important in China. The methods, manners and the ways it is carried out is affected by the rank and identity of the person doing the apologizing and the person being apologized to and is often conducted in a way that is difficult for Westerners to unravel and comprehend.

道歉在中国很重要，尤其是道歉的方式途径。要根据不同的人的地位，身份等特征去选择不同的道歉的方式。这是西方人难以理解的地方。

Chinese find it difficult and humiliating to apologize to someone face to face. Sometimes they refuse to apologize even when they know they are wrong. Refusing to apologize causes great harm because of concerns about losing face. In some places in China, there are apologist-for-hire businesses that allow people to hire a stranger to say I'm sorry to someone they wish to apologize to. The enterprises began in 2000 in Nanjing and have spread to Beijing and other cities.

但是另一方面，纠结的中国人又很难当着面儿道歉，觉得很丢人，即使他们知道他们错了。

Indirectness, Uncertainty and Lying

http://factsanddetails.com/skins/country/images/pmark.gif如何用英文描述中国人的性格特征" /> Chinese can also be very indirect, sometimes painfully so, especially when talking about something that bothers them or may cause them to look bad. Chinese, for example, consider it rude to ask for something directly and tend to avoid using questions that have a yes or no answer to avoid putting someone in the position where they might have to give an answer they don't want to give or hurt someone's feelings. Even inquiring about directions can be perceived as impolite because the person who is asked directions may not know where the place is and this could cause them to feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.

http://factsanddetails.com/skins/country/images/pmark.gif如何用英文描述中国人的性格特征" /> The Chinese do a great deal of communicating thorough symbolic expression, hints and allusions, expecting listeners and readers to grasp the meaning by reading between the lines. The Chinese like to say, “He who says the least says the most.” One Chinese man told the Los Angeles Times, "Chinese thinking is different from Western thinking. Westerners try to get at things very clearly, asking what, why and how much. Chinese are more interested in dealing with things using metaphors or intuitive comparisons."

中国人说话最擅长的就是含蓄。中国有句谚语：沉默是金。言多必失

Chinese have a high tolerance for uncertainty, Many feel comfortable and even thrive in it. A book editor told the Los Angeles Times. “After a while it becomes quite normal.”.

http://factsanddetails.com/skins/country/images/pmark.gif如何用英文描述中国人的性格特征" />One Chinese man who returned to China after many years in the United States, told the Washington Post, “People think in a more complicated way. I’m more straightforward now, but they’re all zigzagging.” A prominent architect said, “We could do much better if we could think more. But you don’t have so much time for thinking.”

中国人说话爱拐弯抹角，zigzag (成Z字形的）

People in China lie all the time about this and that. Teenagers lie about their age to get jobs. Workers lie when they are negotiating so they can a better job.

中国人爱撒谎。