Buddy, Beware

Seventh grade brought changes, all right, but the biggest one didn’t happen at school --- it happened at home. Granddad Duncan came to live with us.

At first it was kind of weird because none of us really knew him. Except for Mom, of course. And even though she’s spent the past year and a half trying to convince us he’s a great guy, from what I can tell, the thing he likes to do best is stare out the front-room window. There’s not much to see out there except the Bakers’ front yard, but you can find him there day or night, sitting in the big easy chair they moved in with him, staring out the window.

Okay, so he also reads Tom Clancy novels and the newspapers and does crossword puzzles and tracks his stocks, but those things are all distractions. Given no one to justify it to, the man would stare out the window until he fell asleep. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. It just seems so … boring.

Mom says he stares like that because he misses Grandma, but that’s not something Granddad had ever discussed with me. As a matter of fact, he never discussed much of anything with me until a few months ago when he read about Juli in the newspaper.

Now, Juli Baker did not wind up on the front page of the Mayfield Times for being an eighth-grade Einstein, like you might suspect. No, my friend, she got front-page coverage because she refused to climb out of a sycamore tree.

Not that I could tell a sycamore from a maple or a birch for that matter, but Juli, of course, knew what kind of tree it was and passed that knowledge along to every creature in her wake.

So this tree, this sycamore tree, was up the hill on a vacant lot on Collier Street, and it was massive. Massive and ugly. It was twisted and gnarled and bent, and I kept expecting the thing to blow over in the wind.

One day last year I’d finally had enough of her yakking about that stupid tree. I came right out and told her that it was not a magnificent sycamore, it was, in reality, the ugliest tree known to man. And you know what she said? She said I was visually challenged. Visually challenged! This from the girl who lives in a house that’s the scourge of the neighborhood. They’ve got bushes growing over windows, weeds sticking out all over the place, and a barnyard’s worth of animals running wild. I’m talking dogs, cats, chickens, even snakes.

I swear to God, her brothers have a boa constrictor in their room. They dragged me in there when I was about ten and made me watch it eat a rat. A live, beady-eyed rat. They held that rodent up by its tail and gulp, the boa swallowed it whole. That snake gave me nightmares for a month.

Anyway, normally I wouldn’t care about someone’s yard, but the bakers’mess bugged my dad big-time, and he channeled his frustration into our yard. He said it was our neighborly duty to show them what a yard’s supposed to look like.

So while Mike and Matt are busy plumping up their boa, I’m having to mow and edge our yard, then sweep the walkways and gutter, which is going a little overboard, if you ask me.

And you’d think Juli’s dad --- who’s a big, strong, bricklaying dude --- would fix the place up, but no. According to my mom, he spends all his free time painting. His landscapes don’t seem like anything special to me, but judging by his price tags, he thinks quite a lot of them. We see them every year at the Mayfield County Fair, and my parents always say the same thing: “the world would have more beauty in it if he’d fix up the yard instead.”

Mom and Juli’s mom do talk some. I think my mom feels sorry for Mrs. Baker --- she says she married a dreamer, and because of that, one of the two of them will always be unhappy.

Whatever. Maybe Juli’s aesthetic sensibilities have been permanently screwed up by her father and none of this is her fault, but Juli has always thought that that sycamore tree was God’s gift to our little corner of the universe.

Back in the third and fourth grades she used to clown around with her brothers in the branches or peel big chunks of bark off so they could slide down the crook in its trunk. It seemed like they were playing in it whenever my mom took us somewhere in the car. Juli’d be swinging from the branches, ready to fall and break every bone in her body, while we were waiting at the stoplight, and my mom would shake her head and say, “Don’t you ever climb that tree like that, do you hear me, Bryce? I never want to see you doing that! You either, Lynetta. That is much too dangerous.”

My sister would roll her eyes and say, “As if,” while I’d slump beneath the window and pray for the light to change before Juli squealed my name for the world to hear.

I did try to climb it once in the fifth grade. It was the day after Juli had rescued my kite from its mutant toy-eating foliage. She climbed miles up to get my kite, and when she came down, she was actually very cool about it. She didn’t hold my kite hostage and stick her lips out like I was afraid she might. She just handed it over and then backed away.

I was relieved, but I also felt like a weenie. When I’d seen where my kite was trapped, I was sure it was a goner. Not Juli. She scrambled up and got it down in no time. Man, it was embarrassing.

So I made a mental picture of how high she’d climbed, and the next day I set off to outdo her by at least two branches. I made it past the crook, up a few limbs, and then --- just to see how I was doing --- I looked down.

Mis-take! It felt like I was on top of the Empire State Building without a bungee. I tried looking up to where my kite had been, but it was hopeless. I was indeed a tree-climbling weenie.

Then junior high started and my dream of a Juli-free existence shattered. I had to take the bus, and you-know-who did, too. There were about eight kids altogether at our bus stop, which created a buffer zone, but it was no comfort zone. Juli always tried to stand beside me, or talk to me, or in some other way mortify me.

And then she started climbing. The girl is in the seventh grade, and she’s climbing a tree --- way, way up in a tree. And why does she do it? So she can yell down at us that the bus is five! four! three blocks away! Blow-by-blow traffic watch from a tree --- what every kid in junior high feels like hearing first thing in the morning.

She tried to get me to come up there with her, too. “Bryce, come on! You won’t believe the colors! It’s absolutely magnificent! Bryce, you’ve got to come up here!”

Yeah, I could just hear it: “Bryce and Juli sitting in a tree …” Was I ever going to leave the second grade behind?

One morning I was specifically not looking up when out of nowhere she swings down from a branch and practically knocks me over. Heart attack!

I dropped my backpack and wrenched my neck, and that did it. I refused to wait under that tree with that maniac monkey on the loose anymore. I started leaving the house at the very last minute. I made up my own waiting spot, and when I’d see the bus bull up. I’d truck up the hill and get on board.

No Juli, no problem.

And that, my friend, took care of the rest of seventh grade and almost all of eighth, too, until one day a few months ago. That’s when I heard a commotion up the hill and could see some big trucks parked up on Collier Street where the bus pulls in. there were some men shouting stuff up at Juli, who was, of course, five stories up in the tree.

All the other kids started to gather under the tree, too, and I could hear them telling her she had to come down. She was fine --- that was obvious to anyone with a pair of ears --- but I couldn’t fugure out what they were all arguing about.

I trucked up the hill, and as I got closer and saw what the men were holding, I figured out in a hurry what was making Juli refuse to come out of the tree.

Chain saws.

Don’t get me wrong here, okay? The tree was an ugly mutant tangle of gnarly branches. The girl arguing with those men was Juli – the world’s peskiest, bossiest, most know-it-all female. But all of a sudden my stomach completely bailed on me. Juli loved that tree. Stupid as it was, she loved that tree, and cutting it down would be like cutting out her heart.

Everyone tried to talk her down. Even me. But she said she wasn’t coming down, not ever, and then she tried to talk us up. “Bryce, please! Come up here with me. They won’t cut it down if we’re all up here!”

For a second I considered it. But then the bus arrived and I talked myself out of it. It wasn’t my tree, and even though she acted like it was, it wasn’t Juli’s, either.

We boarded the bus and left her behind, but school was pretty much a waste. I couldn’t seem to stop thinking about Juli. Was she still up in the tree? Were they going to arrest her?

When the bus dropped us off that afternoon, Juli was gone and so was half the tree. The top branches, the place my kite had been stuck, her favorite perch --- they were all gone.

We watched them work for a little while, the chain saws gunning at full throttle, smoking as they chewed through wood. The tree looked lopsided and naked, and after a few minutes I had to get out of there. It was like watching someone dismember a body, and for the first time in ages, I felt like crying. Crying. Over a stupid tree that I hated.

I went home and tried to shake it off, but I kept wondering, should I have gone up the tree with her? Would it have done any good?

I thought about calling Juli to tell her I was sorry they’d cut it down, but I didn’t. It would’ve been too, I don’t know, weird.

She didn’t show at the bus stop the next morning and didn’t ride the bus home that afternoon, either.

Then that night, right before dinner, my grandfather summoned me into the front room. He didn’t call to me as I was walking by --- that would have bordered on friendliness. What he did was talk to my mother, who talked to me. “I don’t know what it’s about, honey,” she said. “Maybe he’s just ready to get to now you a little better.”

Great. The man’s had a year and a half to get acquainted, and he chooses now to get to know me. But I couldn’t exactly blow him off.

My grandfather’s a big man with a meaty nose and greased-back salt-and-pepper hair. He lives in house slippers and a sports coat, and I’ve never seen a whisker on him. They grow, but he shaves them off like three times a day. It’s a real recreational activity for him.

Besides his meaty nose, he’s also got big meaty hands. I suppose you’d notice his hands regardless, but what makes you realize just how beefy they are is his wedding ring. That thing’s never going to come off, and even though my mother says that’s how it should be, I think he ought to get it cut off. Another few pounds and that ring’s going to amputate his finger.

When I went in to see him, those big hands of his were woven together, resting on the newspaper in his lap. I said, “Granddad? You wanted to see me?”

“Have a seat, son.”

Son? Half the time he didn’t seem to know who I was, and now suddenly I was “son”? I sat in the chair opposite him and waited.

“Tell me about your friend Juli Baker.”

“Juli? She’s not exactly my friend … !”

“Why is that?” he asked. Calmly. Like he had prior knowledge.

I started to justify it, then stopped myself and asked, “Why do you want to know?”

He opened the paper and pressed down the crease, and that’s when I realized that Juli Baker had made the front page of the Mayfield Times.

There was a huge picture of her in the tree, surrounded by a fire brigade and policemen, and then some smaller photos I couldn’t make out very well. “Can I see that?”

He folded it up but didn’t hand it over. “Why isn’t she your friend, Bryce?”

“Because she’s …” I shook my head and said, “You’d have to know Juli.”

“I’d like to.”

“What? Why?”

“Because the girl’s got and iron backbone. Why don’t you invite her over sometime?”

“An iron backbone? Granddad, you don’t understand! That girl is a royal pain. She’s a show-off, she’s a know-it-all, and she is pushy beyond belief!”

“Is that so.”

“Yes! That’s absolutely so! And she’s been stalking me since the second grade!”

He frowned, then looked out the window and asked, “ They’ve lived there that long?”

“I think they were all born there!”

He frown some more before he looked back at me and said, “A girl like that doesn’t live next door to everyone, you know.”

“Lucky them!”

He studied me, long and hard. I said, “What?” but he didn’t flinch. He just kept staring at me, and I couldn’t take it --- I had to look away.

Keep in mind that this was the first real conversation I’d had with my grandfather. This was the first time he’d made the effort to talk to me about something besides passing the salt. And does he want to get to know me? No! He wants to know about Juli!

I couldn’t just stand up and leave, even though that’s what I felt like doing. Somehow I knew if I left like that, he’s quit talking to me at all. Even about salt. So I sat there feeling sort of tortured. Was he mad at me? How could he be mad at me? I hadn’t done anything wrong!

When I looked up, he was sitting there holding out the newspaper to me. “Read this,” he said. “Without prejudice.”

I took it, and when he went back to looking out the window, I knew --- I’d been dismissed.

By the time I got down to my room, I was mad. I slammed my bedroom door and flopped down on the bed, and after fuming about my sorry excuse for a grandfather for a while, I shoved the newspaper in the bottom drawer of my desk. Like I needed to know any more about Juli Baker.

At dinner my mother asked me why I was so sulky, and she kept looking from me to my grandfather. Granddad didn’t seem to need any salt, which was a good thing because I might have thrown the shaker at him.

My sister and dad were all business as usual, though. Lynetta ate about two raisins out of carrot salad, then peeled the skin and meat off her chicken wing and nibbled gristle off the bone, while my father filled up airspace talking about office politics and the need for a shakedown in upper management.

No one was listening to him --- no one ever does when he gets on one of his if-I-ran-the-circus jags --- but for once Mon wasn’t even pretending.

And for once she wasn’t trying to convince Lynetta that dinner was delicious either. She just kept eyeing me and Granddad, trying to pick up on why we were miffed at each other.

Not that he had anything to be miffed at me about. What had I done to him, anyway? Nothing. Nada. But he was, I could tell. And I completely avoided looking at him until about halfway through dinner, when I sneaked a peek.

He was studying me, all right. And even though it wasn’t a mean stare, or a hard stare, it was, you know, firm. Steady. And It weired me out.

What was his deal?

I didn’t look at him again. Or at my mother. I just went back to eating and pretended to listen to my dad. And the first chance I got, I excused myself and holed up in my room.

I was planning to call my friend Garrett like I usually do when I’m bent about something. I even punched in his number, but I don’t know. I just hung up. And later when my mom came in, I faked like I was sleeping. I haven’t done that in years. The whole night was weird like that. I just wanted to be left alone.

Juli wasn’t at the bus stop the next morning. Or Friday morning. She was at school, but you’d never know it if you didn’t actually look. She didn’t whip her hand through the air trying to get the teacher to call on her or charge through the halls getting to class. She didn’t make unsolicited comments for the teacher’s edification or challenge the kids who took cuts in the milk line. She just sat. Quiet.

I told myself I should be glad about it --- it was like she wasn’t even there, and isn’t that what I’d always wanted? But still, I felt bad. About her tree, about how she hurried off to eat by herself in the library at lunch, about how her eyes were red around the edges. I wanted to tell her, Man, I’m sorry about your sycamore tree, but the words never seemed to come out.

By the middle of the next week, they’d finished taking down the tree, they cleared the lot and even tried to pull up the stump, but that sucker would not budge, so they wound up grinding it down into the dirt.

Juli still didn’t show at the bus stop, and by the end of the week I learned from Garrett that she was riding a bike. He said he’d seen her on the slide of the road twice that week, putting the chain back on the derailleur of a rusty old ten-speed.

I figured she’d be back. It was a long ride out to Mayfield Junior High, and once she got over the tree, she’s start riding the bus again. I even caught myself looking for her. Not on the lookout, just looking.

Then one day it rained and I thought for sure she’d be up at the bus stop, but no. Garrett said he saw her trucking along on her bike in a bright yellow poncho, and in math I noticed that her pants were still soaked from the knees down.

When math let out, I started to chase after her to tell her that she ought to trying riding the bus again, but I stopped myself in the nick of time. What was I thinking? That Juli wouldn’t take a little friendly concern and completely misinterpret it? Whoa now, buddy, beware! Better to just leave well enough alone.

After all, the last thing I needed was for Juli Baker to think I missed her.

The Sycamore Tree

I love to watch my faterh paint. Or really, I love to hear him talk while he paints. The words always come out soft and somehow heavy when he’s brushing on the layers of a landscape. Not sad. Weary, maybe, but peaceful.

My father doesn’t have a studio or anything, and since the garage is stuffed with things that everyone thinks they need but no one ever uses, he paints outside.

Outside is where the best landscapes are, only they’re nowhere near our house. So what he does is keep a camera in his truck. His job as a mason takes him to lots of different locations, and he’s always on the lookout for a great sunrise or sunset, or even just a nice field with sheep or cows. Then he picks out one of the snapshots, clips it to his easel, and paints.

The paintings come out fine, but I’ve always felt a little sorry for him, having to paint beautiful scenes in our backyard, which is not exactly picturesque. It never was much of a yard, but after I started raising chickens, things didn’t exactly improve.

Dad doesn’t seem to see the backyard or the chickens when he’s painting, though. It’s not just the snapshot or the canvas he sees either. It’s something much bigger. He gets this look in his eye like he’s transcended the yard, the neighborhood, the world. And as his big, callused hands sweep a tiny brush against the canvas, it’s almost like his body has been possessed by some graceful spirtitual being.

When I was little, my dad would let me sit beside him on the porch while he painted, as long as I’d be quiet. I don’t do quiet easily, but I discovered that after five or ten minutes without a peep, he’d start talking.

I’ve learned a lot about my dad that way. He told me all sorts of stories about what he’d done when he was my age, and other things, too --- like how he got his first job delivering hay, and how he wished he’d finished college.

When I got a little older, he still talked about himself and his childhood, but he also started asking questions about me. What were we learning at school? What book was I currently reading? What did I think about this or that.

Then one time he surprised me and asked me about Bryce. Why was I so crazy about Bryce? I told him about his eyes and his hair and the way his cheeks blush, but I don’t think I explained it very well because when I was done Dad shook his head and told me in soft, heavy words that I needed to start looking at the whole landscape.

I didn’t really know what he meant by that, but it made me want to argue with him. How could he possibly understand about Bryce? He didn’t know him!

But this was not an arguing spot. Those were scattered throughout the house, but not out here.

We were both quiet for a record-breaking amount of time before he kissed me on the forehead and said, “Proper lighting is everything, Julianna.”

Proper lighting? What was that supposed to mean? I sat there wondering, but I was afraid that by asking I’d be admitting that I wasn’t mature enough to understand, and for some reason it felt obvious. Like I should understand.

After that he didn’t talk so much about events as he did about ideas. And the older I got, the more philosophical he seemed to get. I don’t know if he really got more philosophical or if he just thought I could handle it now that I was in the double digits.

Mostly the things he talked about floated around me, but once in a while something would happen and I would understand exactly what he had meant. “A painting is more than the sum of its parts,” he would tell me, and then go on to explain how the cow by itself is just a cow, and the meadow by itself is just grass and flowers, and the sun peeking through the trees is just a beam of light, but put them all together and you’ve got magic.

I understood what he was saying, but I never felt what he was saying until one day when I was up in the sycamore tree.

The sycamore tree ahd been at the top of the hill forever. It was on a big vacant lot, giving shade in the summer and a place for birds to nest in the spring. It had a built-in slide for us, too. Its trunk bent up and around in almost a complete spiral, and it was so much fun to ride down. My mom told me she thought the tree must have been damaged as a sapling but survived, and now, maybe a hundred years later, it was still there, the biggest tree she’d ever seen. “A testimony to endurance” is what she called it.

I had always played in the tree, but I didn’t become a serious blimber until the fifth grade, when I went up to rescue a kite that was stuck in its branches. I’d first spotted the kite floating free through the air and then saw it dive-bomb somewhere up the hill by the sycamore tree.

I’ve flown kites before and I know --- sometimes they’re gone forever, and sometimes they’re just waiting in the middle of the road for you to rescue them. Kites can be lucky or they can be ornery. I’ve had both kinds, and a lucky kite is definitely worth chasing after.

This kite looked lucky to me. It wasn’t anything fancy, just an old-fashioned diamond with blue and yellow stripes. But it stuttered along in a friendly way, and when it dive-bombed, it seemed to do from exhaustion as opposed to spite. Ornery kites dive-bomb out of spite. They never get exhausted because they won’t stay up long enough to poop out. Thirty feet up they just sort of smirk at you and crash for the fun of it.

So Champ and I ran up to Collier Street, and after scouting out the road, Champ started barking at the sycamore tree. I looked up and spotted it, too, flashing blue and yellow through the branches.

It was a long ways up, but I thought I’d give it a shot. I shinnied up the trunk, took a shortcut across the slide, and started climbing. Champ kept a good eye on me, barking me along, and soon I was higher that I’d ever been. But still the kite seemed forever away.

Then below me I noticed Bryce coming around the corner and through the vacant lot. And I could tell from the way he was looking up that this was his kite.

What a lucky, lucky kite this was turning out to be!

“Can you climb that high?” he called up to me.

“Sure!” I called back. And up, up, up I went!

The branches were strong, with just the right amount of intersections to make climbing easy. And the higher I got, the more amazed I was by the view. I’d never seen a view like that! It was like being in an airplane above all the rooftops, about the other trees. Above the world!

Then I looked down. Down at Bryce. And suddenly I got dizzy and weak in the knees. I was miles off the ground! Bryce shouted, “ Can you reach it?”

I caught my breath and managed to call down, “No problem!” then forced myself to concentrate on those blue and yellow stripes, to focus on them and only them as I shinnied up, up, up. Finally I touched it; I grasped it; I had the kite in my hand!

But the string was tangled in the branches above and I couldn’t seem to pull it free. Bryce called, “Break the string!” and somehow I managed to do just that.

When I had the kite free, I needed a minute to rest. To recover before starting down. So instead of looking at the ground below me, I held on tight and looked out. Out across the rooftops.

That’s when the fear of being up so high began to lift, and in its place came the most amazing feeling that I was flying. Just soaring above the earth, sailing among the clouds.

Then I began to notice how wonderful the breeze smelled. It smelled like … sunshine. Like sunshine and wild grass and pomegranates and rain! I couldn’t stop breathing it in, filling my lungs again and again with the sweetest smell I’d ever known.

Bryce called up, “Are you stuck?” which brought me down to earth. Carefully I backed up, prized stripes in hand, and as I worked my way down, I could see Bryce circling the tree, watching me to make sure I was okay.

By the time I hit the slide, the heady feeling I’d had in the tree was changing into the heady realization that Bryce and I were alone.

Alone!

My heart was positively racing as I held the kite out of him. But before he could take it, Champ nudged me from behind and I could feel his cold, wet nose against my skin.

Against my skin?!

I grabbed my jeans in back, and that’s when I realized the seat of my pants was ripped wide open.

Bryce laughd a little nervous laugh, so I could tell he knew, and for once mine were the cheeks that were beet red. He took his kite and ran off, leaving me to inspect the damage.

I did eventually get over the embarrassment of my jeans, but I never got over the view. I kept thinking of what it felt like to be up so high in that tree.

I wanted to see it, to feel it, again. And again.

It wasn’t long before I wasn’t afraid of being up so high and found the spot that became my spot. I cound sit there for hours, just looking out at the the world. Sunsets were amazing. Some days they’d be purple and link, some days they’d be a blazing orange, setting fire to clouds across the horizon.

It was on a day like that when my father’s notion of the whole being greater than the sum of its parts moved from my head to my heart. The view from my sycamore was more than rooftops and clouds and wind and colors combined. It was magic.

And I started marveling at how I was feeling both humble and majestic. How was that possible? How could I be so full of peace and full of wonder? How could this simple tree make me feel so complex? So alive.

I went up the tree every chance I got. And in junior high that became almost every day because the bus to our school picks up on Collier Street, right in front of the sycamore tree.

At first I just wanted to see how high I could get before the bus pulled up, but before long I was leaving the house early so I could get clear up to my spot to see the sun rise, or the birds flutter about, or just the other kids converge on the curb.

I tried to convince the kids at the bus stop to climb up with me, even a little ways, but all of them said they didn’t want to get dirty. Turn down a chance to feel magic for fear of a little dirt? I couldn’t believe it.

I’d never told my mother about climbing the tree. Being the truly sensible adult that she is, she would have told me it was too dangerous. My brothers, being brothers, wouldn’t have cared.

That left my father. The one person I knew would understand. Still, I was afraid to tell him. He’d tell my mother and pretty soon they’d insist that I stop. So I kept quiet, kept climbing, and felt a somewhat lonely joy as I looked out over the world.

Then a few months ago I found myself talking to the tree. An entire conversation, just me and a tree. And on the climb down I felt like crying. Why didn’t I have someone real to talk to? Why didn’t I have a best friend like everyone else seemed to? Sure, there were kids I knew at school, but none of them were close friends. They’d have no interest in climbing the tree. In smelling the sunshine.

That night after dinner my father went outside to paint. In the cold of the night, under the glare of the porch light, he went out to put the finishing touches on a sunrise he’d been working on.

I got my jacket and went out to sit beside him, quiet as a mouse.

After a few minutes he said, “what’s on your mind, sweetheart?”

In all the times I’d sat out there with him, he’d never asked me that. I looked at him but couldn’t seem to speak.

He mixed two hues of orange together, and very softly he said, “Talk to me.”

I sighed so heavily it surprised even me. “I understand why you come out here, Dad.”

He tried kidding me. “Would you mind explaining it to your mother?”

“Really, Dad. I understand now about the whole being greater than the sum of the parts.”

He stopped mixing. “You do? What happened? Tell me about it!”

So I told him about the sycamore tree. About the view and the sounds and the colors and the wind, and how being up so high felt like flying. Felt like magic.

He didn’t interrupt me once, and when my confession was through, I looked at him and whispered. “Would you climb up there with me?”

He thought about this a long time, then smiled and said, “I’m not much of a climber anymore, Julianna, but I’ll give it a shot, sure. How about this weekend, when we’ve got lots of daylight to work with?”

“Great!”

I went to bed so excited that I don’t think I slept more than five minutes the whole night. Saturday was right around the corner. I couldn’t wait!

The next morning I raced to the bus stop extra early and climbed the tree. I caught the sun rising through the clouds, sending streaks of fire from one end of the world to the other. And I was in the middle of making a mental list of all the things I was going to show my father when I heard a noise below.

I looked down, and parked right beneath me were two trucks. Big trucks. One of them was towing a long, empty trailer, and the other had a cherry picker on it --- the kind they use to work on overhead power lines and telephone poles.

There were four men standing around talking, drinking from thermoses, and I almost called down to them, “I’m sorry, but you can’t park there … That’s a bus stop!” But before I could, one of the men reached into the back of a truck and started unloading tools. Gloves. Ropes. A chain. Earmuffs. And then chain saws. Three chain saws.

And still I didn’t get it. I kept looking around for what it was they could possibly be there to cut down. The one of the kids who rides the bus showed up and started talking to them, and pretty soon he was pointing up at me.

One of the men called, “Hey! You better come down from there. We gotta take this thing down.”

I held on to the branch tight, because suddenly it felt as though I might fall. I managed to choke out, “The tree?”

“Yeah, now come on down.”

“But who told you to cut it down?”

“The owner!” he called back.

“But why?”

Even from forty feet up I could see him scowl. “Because he’s gonna build himself a house, and he can’t very well do that with this tree in the way. Now come on, girl, we’ve got work to do!”

By the time most of the kids had gathered for the bus. They weren’t saying anything to me, just looking up at me and turning from time to time to talk to each other. Then Bryce apeared, so I knew the bus was about to arrive. I searched across the rooftops and sure enough, there it was, less than four blocks away.

My heart was crazy with panic. I didn’t know what to do! I couldn’t leave and let them cut down the tree! I cried, “You can’t cut it down! You just can’t!”

One of the men shook his head and said, “I am this close to calling the police. You are trespassing and obstructing progress on a contracted job. Now are you going to come down or are we going to cut you down?”

The bus was tree blocks away. I’d never missed school for any reason other than legitimate illness, but I knew in my heart that I was going to miss my ride. “You’re going to have to cut me down!” I yelled. Then I had an idea. They’d never cut it down if all of us were in the tree. They’d have to listen! “Hey, guys!” I called to my classmates. “Get up here with me! They can’t cut it down if we’re all up hear! Marcia! Tony! Bryve! C’mon, you guys, don’t let them do this!”

They just stood there, staring up at me.

I could see the bus, one block away. “Cone on, you guys! You don’t have to come up this high. Just a little ways. Please!”

The bus blasted up and pulled to the curb in front of the trucks, and when the doors folded open, one by one my classmates climbed on board.

What happened after that is a bit of a blur. I remember the neighbors gathering, and the police with megaphones. I remember the fire brigade, and some guy saying it was his blasted tree and I’d darn well better get out of it.

Somebody tracked down my mother, who cried and pleaded and acted not at all the way a sensible mother should, but I was not coming down. I was not coming down.

Then my father came racing up. He jumped out his pickup truck, and after talking with my mother for a few minutes, he got the guy in the cherry picker to give him a lift up to where I was. After that it was all over. I Started crying and tried to get him to look out over the rooftops, but wouldn’t. He said that no view was worth his little girl’s safety.

He got me down and he took me home, only I couldn’t stay there. I couldn’t stand the sound of chain saws in the distance.

So Dad took me with him to work, and while he put up a block wall, I sat in his truck and cried. I must’ve cried for two weeks straight. Oh, sure, I went to school and I functioned the best I could, but I didn’t go there on the bus. I started riding my bike instead, taking the long way so I wouldn’t have to go up to Collier Street. Up to a pile of sawdust that used to be the earth’s most magnificent sycamore tree.

Then one evening when I was locked up in my room, my father came in with something under a towel. I could tell it was a painting because that’s how he transports the important ones when he shows them in the park. He sat down, resting the painting on the floor in front of him. “I always liked that tree of yours,” he said. “Even before you told me about it.”

“Oh, Dad, it’s okay. I’ll get over it.”

“No, Julianna. No, you won’t.”

I started crying. “It was just a tree…”

“I never want you to convince yourself of that. You and I both know it isn’t true.”

“But Dad…”

“Bear with me a minute, would you?” he took a deep breath. “I want the spirit of that tree to be with you always. I want you to rember how you felt when you were up there.” He hesitated a moment, then handed me the painting. “So I made this for you.”

I pulled off the towel, and there was my tree. My beautiful, majestic sycamore tree. Through the branches he’d painted the fire of sunrise, and it seemed to me I could feel the wind. And way up in the tree was a tiny girl looking off into the distance, her cheeks fushed with wind. With joy. With magic.

“Don’t cry, Julianna. I want it to help you, not hurt you.” I wiped the tears from my cheeks and gave a mighty sniff. “Thank you, Daddy,” I choked out. “Thank you.”

I hung the painting across the room from my bed. It’s the first thing I see every morning and the last thing I see every night. And now that I can look at it without crying, I see more than the tree and what being up in its branches meants to me. I see the day that my view of things around me started changing.