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Learning styles of writing: Description

英语描写文的写作方法

§    描写文是一种用生动形象的语言对客观世界加以艺术和主观描绘的一种文体。它细致入微地描绘人物的状态、动作或景物的性质、特征，把对人物、物体、地方或景色的印象和了解细腻地表达出来，在读者面前再现它们的形象。描写文的显著特点是其描写的具体性、生动性和创造性。

 

§    一般说来，描写是用文字画一幅图画。它的对象有时是感官的印象：视觉上的、嗅觉上的、触觉上的，或味觉上的；有时候是情感和感觉：喜、怒、哀、乐。描写的内容不外乎人物(people)，地方(places)，及事物(things)。

 

 

§    1．人物描写（description of a person）

§    人物描写的功能多种多样，可以刻画人物性格特征，表现人物精神面貌，披露人物内心活动，揭示人物身份境遇，显示人物性格变化，突出作品主题思想等等。为使描写形象逼真、线条清晰、性格鲜明，作者要善于观察，调动丰富的想象力和敏锐的判断力，抓住描写对象的独特之处，并精于语言技巧，用生动活泼的语言再现人物鲜明的形象和性格。例如：

 

§         The person I admire is my mum. She is an English teacher. She is very popular among the students because she spends lots of time on her lessons and has a good sense of humor. Students all enjoy her class. My mum is not only a good teacher, but also a great mother. She is patient with me and always smiling while talking. My mum teaches me how to think independently and helps me to build up my confidence. When I have some difficulties in my studies, it is my mum who encourages me to work until I solve the problem. When I’m feeling sad or bad, it is also my mum who looks after me with care.

 

 

§        I remember when I caught a fever at midnight last year, my mum took me to the hospital as fast as she could. When we got home after my injection, it was about 5 o’clock in the early morning. My mum only slept 2 hours because she had to wake up at 7 o’clock to prepare breakfast for me, and then she went to work. She must be very tired that day.

§        My mum is not very beautiful, but I admire and love her.

 

 

§    2．景物描写（description of a scenery）

§    景物描写指通过对自然景致的描绘, 旨在表明作者对人与自然的复杂关系的理解。在简明扼要交代时间地点后, 详细描写景色主宰画面的主要特点, 通过具体介绍景色的色彩、气息和动态, 着重烘托出景色的主要基调, 结尾时要概括性地总结景色的特点, 起到画龙点睛的作用。注意下面的片段中是以什么样的逻辑顺序进行描写的？

§    Title:  A Spring Morning   

 

§         It was early in the spring morning. The sun was just rising out of the eastern horizon emitting(放射;发出)  steaks of red hue(颜色,色彩)  through the clouds and across the sky. Soon the campus was in the first rays of the sun. The lake, the trees and the bamboos looked as if they were all gilded(镀金的). The ground was covered with tender grasses and the beaded(饰以珠的, 珠状的)  dewdrops stood on their tips and reflected the sunshine.

 

§        Birds flew about in the woods twittering(叽叽喳喳)  restlessly. Some boy students who were absorbed in reading leaned against the trees with buds peeping out from within the gray barks(树皮). A couple of girl students read English aloud while walking up and down the gravel path around the lake where a sort of stream(光束) rose forming a thin mist.

§        It was really a morning of beauty of vigor and of hope.

点评

§    这个片段第一段描绘春天早晨日出的景色，其描写的顺序为从上到下，从大范围到小范围｡

§    第二段描写学生晨读的情景，其描写的顺序为从树上到地上，从树林到湖边｡

§    第三段用一句话概括了春天美丽的早晨。

 

 

记叙描写文百变过渡词

§    记叙描写文可以使用的过渡词很多，主要的种类有表示事情发生的时间和顺序的；解释事情发生因果关系的；表示对照、递进等其他转承关系的，以及表示总结或者结果的，详见下表：

 

 

§    时间和顺序类：

§    during, the first time, recently, lately, in the past weeks, last summer, on a chilly winter morning, when the day broke, … (表示时间)

§    at first, in the first place, secondly, then, in the end, lastly, finally, suddenly, all of a sudden, above all, last but not (the) least（表示顺序）

 

§    因果类：

§    because, in that, as, since, seeing that  now that (连词，表示原因)

§    on account of, owing to, due to, thanks to, as a result of (介词短语，表示原因)

§    so, therefore, hence, so that, thus    (表示结果)

§    as a result, consequently, in consequence  (表示结果)

 

§    转承关系类：

§    besides, indeed, moreover, furthermore, on the other hand, hence, therefore, also, certainly, in fact (表示递进关系)

§    yet, otherwise, or, unfortunately, meanwhile, however, nevertheless, while, whereas, in contrast to, in opposition to, on the contrary, by contrary (表示对照关系)

 

§    总结类：

§    in brief, in short, in general,

§    as a result, as a summary, all in all,

§    in summary, in a word, in conclusion

§    to sum up,

§    to conclude,

§    to round up,

§    to summarize,

§    to wrap up,

 

 

§    四级写作中运用描写文的例子：

§    2004年6月的Ａ Brief Introduction to a Tourist Attraction 是一篇解说词，属应用文，但同时要求说明和描写。这表明四级作文命题越来越灵活。

 

导游词例子

【例证】 A Brief Introduction to a Tourist    Attraction     [2004年6月四级真题]

§     Your role: a tour guide

§     Your audience: a group of foreign tourists

§     Your introduction should include:

§          Some welcome words; the schedule for the day; a description of the place the tourists will be visiting (e.g. a scenic spot or a historic site, etc.)

§     You should make the introduction interesting and the arrangements for the day clear to everybody.

 

§         I feel it a great honor to be your tour guide. On behalf of my tourist company, I warmly welcome all my distinguished guests to visit the Tianjin Radio and TV Tower and the Ancient Culture Street.

§         Located in the center of Tianta Lake, the tower is the landmark(标志性建筑)
of Tianjin. The tower is 415.2 meters high, shooting up in the sky. It’s one of the tallest towers in the world. On the top of the tower, there is a rotating restaurant, you can have bird’s-eye view around the city within 50 minutes.

 

§        Our schedule for the trip is as follows: from 9:00 to 11:00 a.m., we’ll visit the tower and have pictures taken. At 11:00  we’ll assemble in front of the tower entrance and board the bus to the Tianjin Ancient Culture Street. There we’ll enjoy our lunch.

§        Thanks for your attention. Have a good time.

§    Useful Expressions:

§    1. shoot up in the sky 耸入云天

   类似的用法：tower up in the sky

                         soar to heaven

 

§    2.  board the bus to the Tianjin Ancient Culture Street… 坐车去天津古文化街

 

§    Describe something:

  Title:   An Early

         Morning Walk

 

 

§      　　One morning I got up very early, and everything around was very quiet. As I had nothing to do, I decided to take a walk to the park. While I was walking, I found that there were only some young men running in the street. They looked healthy and happy.

§    　When I arrived at the park, I found, to my surprise, that there were so many people there. Some of them were doing morning exercises. Others were practicing kung fu. The rest, especially old people, were taking walks. They seemed to look younger than their real ages.

 

 

§        An early morning walk can help one to keep fit and work efficiently. It can change one's mood and make one's life happier. I think that everyone, young or old, female or male, should get up early and take morning walks. Taking early morning walks makes a man healthy and wise.

 

记叙描写类

   记叙描写类的话题为避免话题过偏，以让每个考生都有话可说，会在题目中体现出一个中心词，让考生围绕该中心词选取与个人生活中相关或比较熟悉的经历来描述。主要目的是希望考生能在内容的选择和描述的基本功方面加以练习。2005年6月的大学英语四级写作题目是回忆老师的教诲和无私奉献，也属于记叙描写类。文章中对某段经历的回忆和描写。

四级写作例文

§    2005年6月四级考试作文题：

§    Teacher’s Day ：
1. 向老师致以节日的问候。
2. 回忆一件老师的教诲中难忘的事情。
3. 我如何报答老师。

 

§        This is Teachers’ Day and a time to be grateful to all teachers. This profession deserves the special recognition and respect. There is no more appropriate time than this to honor you and others in your chosen field. You have my eternal gratefulness(我永远感激您). Have a happy Teachers’ Day.
    The whole secret of the teacher’s force lies in the conviction that men are convertible(可改变的) . Teachers, who educate children, deserve more

 

   honor than parents, who merely gave them birth; for the latter provided more life, while the former ensure a good life. What sculpture (雕刻) is to a block of marble, education is to the soul.

§        My heartfelt thanks to you, dear teacher. On the voyage of life, you have kindled(点燃) the light of hope for me. What you have done enriches my mind and broadens my view. On this day I honor you sincerely. No one deserves a bigger thank than you. One day is hardly enough to show our gratitude.

Teacher’s Day

§    布局与谋篇：

§    九月十日是教师节。在校经历过数次教师节。拿到作文题，不免心头一喜，原来是自己再熟悉不过的话题。

§    从小学到大学，很多教过我的老师都令我终生难忘。想到他们的教诲，感激之情油然而生。将来，无论成为参天大树，还是低矮的灌木，我都将以生命的翠绿作为对老师的回报。在教师节来临之际，愿表示对老师的衷心祝福。

 

 

§           首先表示“节日祝贺”，接下来“从一件难忘的事回忆老师的教诲和无私的奉献”，最后真诚地表达“回报”之情。

§    第一段：向老师表示节日祝贺

§           此段语言应简洁明了，可借用一些现成的事祝贺套语和句型，如：

§    To express my appreciation and gratefulness to …; I would like to send my best wishes to …; I’d like to give my sincere congratulations on …等等。

§    提醒：应学会列提纲：

 

 

§    第一段发展提纲如下：

§    Appreciation and gratefulness

§    A. Teacher’s Day is coming.

§    B. to express my appreciation and   gratefulness to all the teachers

§    点石成金：

§         How time flies! Another Teacher’s Day is around; I’d like to express my heartfelt appreciation and gratitude to all the teachers. And I do hope that all of you are happy and healthy forever.

 

语言亮点回映

§    1. …is coming…换成 “is around…”,显出词汇功底。

§    2. 表达感激的句型 “I’d like to express my heartfelt appreciation and gratitude to …” 用得恰到好处: “heartfelt”的使用更能突出“感激”的情真意切。

§    3. “do” 强调出 “由衷 ”之情。

 

§    第二段：追忆老师的教诲

§    第二段是全文的重头戏，应突出两点：一是“一件难忘的事”， 二是“回忆老师的教诲和无私的奉献”。可运用一些常见的关于老师的比喻。

§    本段提纲如下：

§    Teaching is the greatest career.

§    A. I still remember how my teachers saved me at an important moment.

§    B. Their help enabled me to survive the competition and will surely benefit me in the future.

 

§    初稿：

§         Teaching is the greatest career. Teachers are like gardeners. When I started learning English, I failed in almost all the tests. I could not remember words. I could not recite the text. At last I lost all the interest in English study. But my English teacher was never tired of giving me help. He came to coach me on weekends. He often said to me: “Every effort you make brings you nearer to success.” These words inspired me to make persistent efforts in English study.

 

§    What he said also guided me through my life.

§        ***         ***         ***         ***

§    点石成金：

§         Teaching is the most glorious and respectable career, and teachers are like gardeners --- they tend(照料)and grow the souls and minds of their students. When I started learning English, I came across great difficulties and lost all my self-confidence. But my English teacher was never tired of giving me help and came to coach me

 

   even on weekends. He often said to me: “Every effort you make brings you nearer to success.” His encouragement not only inspired me to make persistent efforts in my study, but also guided me through my life.

 

 

 

语言亮点回映

§    1. 第一句和第二句合并后，主题表达更加连贯。破折号后面增加对“gardener”的进一步的解释，与下文所谈的内容相呼应。

§    2. 运用了 “the most glorious and respectable”，显然比 “greatest” 增色不少。词汇上的雕琢大大提高了阅卷老师的第一印象分。

§    3. 本段运用了 “not only… but also…”将老师教诲的作用，从具体的一事引申到一生，提高了境界。

 

§    第三段：谈对老师关爱的回报。

§    第三段提纲如下：

§    The best way to repay

§    A. bear in mind their teaching

§    B. live up to(不辜负) their expectation

§    点石成金：

§        I am so grateful for all that my teachers have done for me. I believe the best way to repay their devotion and love is to bear in mind what they have taught me, live up to their expectations and be a useful member of society.

 

语言亮点回映

§    1. 本段中运用了“the best way to repay the teacher’s devotion and love” 显得地道自然:

  “devotion”一词表达“奉献”之意，显出考生词汇上的功力。

   2. “to bear in mind…live up to …be a useful member”含义上的递进体现了感恩着眼点的提高。

范文全貌

§        How time flies! Another Teacher’s Day is around; I’d like to express my heartfelt appreciation and gratitude to all the teachers. And I do hope that all of you are happy and healthy forever.

§        Teaching is the most glorious and respectable career, and teachers are like gardeners --- they tend and grow the souls and minds of their students. When I started learning English, I came across great difficulties and lost all my self-confidence. But my English teacher

 

 

 

   teacher was never tired of giving me help and came to coach me even on weekends. He often said to me: “Every effort you make brings you nearer to success.” His encouragement not only inspired me to make persistent efforts in my study, but also guided me though my life.

§        I am so grateful for all that my teachers have done for me. I believe the best way to repay their devotion

 

 

   and love is to bear in mind what they have taught me, live up to their expectations and be a useful member of society.

 

 

 

Model 模板

Assignment

§    Remember the useful expressions for

§        1)  examples

§        2)  listing

§        3)  comparison and contrast

§        4)  cause and effect

§        5)  conclusion or summary

§        6)  time and process

 

Thank You!