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Love is thatone heart meets the other

这篇文章是故事的男主人公写的，确切地说，在邮箱里收到他发来文章的那一瞬间，我就被感动了。从业十四年来，这是目前为止唯一的一个由男主人公亲手写下的故事，他的行动让我再次感受到许多西方男人信守承诺的品格。

年前，在家中修养的我接待了本文故事的主人公来访。他们的那次来访给我的印象很深刻，我一下子就喜欢上了这对夫妻，我似乎早已经认识他们好多年，其实在那之前，我们在QQ上也只是偶尔聊过，但是那次拜访让我真实的和他们面对面分享婚后他们的生活，让我由衷的感叹这两个人的心灵的洁净，也就是在那个美好的黄昏，Doug承诺我，他会写出他们的故事来给我。

我犹豫过是否要全文把文章翻译出来，这样好让看到这篇文章的读者轻松阅读，但我还是决定保留原文，我想，愿意走出国门和已经走出国门的会员们，趁着这个机会学下外语岂不是更好?

感谢Doug让我圆了男主人写他们的爱情故事的梦，感谢冯姐，做事一向低调的她，在我希望她能通过文字参与到帮助和鼓励单身这个群体的期望下，在Doug那么真诚的爱护和尊重下，她勇敢的站出来展示自己，感谢主，让我的一生收获这样多的关爱和尊重，感恩这个世界！

----------------------丁姐序

I would like to start off by saying I was married to my first wife for 44 years until she lost her battle with cancer after a five year fight. Before my first wife died she made me promise that I would remarry after her death. She also made our daughter to promise that that she would help me find a good wife after her death. After her death, I was lost and did not want to live. I had been married since I was 18 years old. I finally decided to go on Christian mingle to find a companion to talk to since my 2 sons had abandoned me after they did not get half of my estate after their mother died. Christian mingle does not go outside the USA but somehow I was connected to China Love and other organizations that went to many places in the world. I know that god was responsible for me traveling the world to find my next wife.

冯姐叙述她的经历：59年的人生，在遇到Doug之前，我从未想过会这样遇到爱情。两年前我的前夫因为突发心肌梗塞去世了，前夫是我的初恋，结婚，生子，他性格温和，不太愿意社交，整个家都是我在撑着，我一直从事财务工作，35年的时间，我工作努力，从普通的财务工作人员，做到了财务总监和副总。我有点累了，想找个男人靠一靠。一个朋友通过东方情缘找到了一位西方男士，我就想着试试看和她们联系。卞姐，郑娟非常耐心细致地给我介绍她们的服务，充分了解之后，我就决定入会了。http://s5/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfP4vJWYa4&690

During my life I have always had dreams from god that comes true sometime in my life. Some are good, and some are bad. As I read the 3000 letters I received, I found one letter that I could tell you what it said as I started reading it. I had seen this letter a few days earlier in a dream. It was a letter from a woman by the name of Linping. One place it showed her age as 38 and the other place showed her age as 58. The pictures that I received showed her age of 30-35 years old, and she was very beautiful. When I read her story I realized she spoke no English and I spoke no Chinese. I waited several days to respond, Linping told me 12 days, until I had a dream from god telling me my wife was in China that he had picked for me, I would be shown what and how to do things. I then contacted Linping and we started talking on QQ and through China Love translator called Blake. We talked every day 3 hours in the morning and three hours in the evening. Linping was very worried about me because she told me I only smiled 5 times when we talked. I explained to Linping I love to have fun and I smiled different from a lot of people that showed their teeth. I was always smiling when I talked to her but she could not tell.

After we talked several weeks Linping invited me to China to see and spend time with her. I told her I was coming for 30 days and Linping said come for only 3-5 days. I finally told Linping I was coming for at least 15 days. I did not have a passport or visa, but again god showed me the way. I had a passport in 10 days, that normally take 30-90 days, a visa in one day, received the paperwork on Friday, and on the plane Monday headed to china.

冯姐叙述他们的网上相遇：Doug说，是神的指引让我们相遇。虽然我还不是基督教徒，我想这就是我们中国人所说的缘分吧。我按照公司的要求拍的照片，登记了资料。发布资料没有多久，Doug就给我写了信， 他只比我大四岁，并且要求跟我QQ聊天。我们每天聊天聊很长的时间，Doug非常真诚。为了和他更多的了解，我减少了自己的工作量，收入也减少了，但我体会到的却是另一种快乐。我们还没有在现实生活中见面，但是，他却不断地对我说：我很喜欢你，我想要跟你结婚。并且，跟我分享他生活中的点点滴滴。我也非常认真的跟他交往，跟他分享我的心情，我的生活。为了让他更加了解我，在我生日那天，我把儿子，儿媳和孙子叫到我家和他视频，让他见见我的家人。他和我的儿子聊得很开心。http://s15/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfP5yjoOee&690

Linping had picked out aroom for me and paid the first night rent until I arrived. When I arrived inchina, I was met by Linping, Blake the translator, and Linping son, Zhang Li. When I arrived at the airport Linping had a big bunch of flowers for me, but I was not given a kiss at the airport because Blake said Linping had been very nervous just before I came. I later found out men and women do not kiss openly in china, but only in the privacy of the house. I told Linping I was American and I would kiss her anytime anywhere.

When I arrived in China I thoughtI would see Linping during the day and room around at night seeing the sights of china. To my surprise I found this was not true. Linping told me she would be with me 24 hours a day! It was a good thing because everything was in Chinese and it would not have been possible for me to get around to see thingsor safe.

The first thing we did wasto purchase a translator machine so we could talk. Many things could be said without speaking, ha! I found out very quickly that the translations are not always accurate and this started to cause problems. I told Linping that if translator made her mad or sad, translation was bad. I would never make her mador sad!

冯姐叙述和Doug的见面：我们很快聊到了见面，想着Doug为了我，要不远万里，乘坐20多个小时的飞机，我很感动。我帮他订了酒店，是我先垫付的钱。我的翻译郑娟很贴心，卞姐也提醒我，不要多花钱。我想着我是找爱人的，我愿意付出，平时生活中我也是这样的，这些钱也在我的能力范围之内。

在机场的见面，我准备的鲜花，到了酒店我给Doug准备了洗漱用品和睡衣。初见他，我完全没有陌生感，感觉和他的心靠得很近很近。两个语言不通的人，交流的确容易出现误会，我尽量的有耐心，说一遍如果不通，就第二遍，慢慢的我们交流得越来越好，感情越来越深。

Linping had told me before I came to China that no man was as good as my profile! On the fourth day of my stay in China, Linping told me I was much better than profile, she accepted my gifts, accepted anengagement ring, and she took me to meet her family. We discussed marriage and I wanted her to come to the USA for 90 days to visit. We had a wonderful 15 days together and we had grown very much in love with each other. I hated to leave China because I did not know how long it would take for us to be together. I left to go home on Saturday and Linping went to resign her job on Sunday so she could take English classes each day. It normally takes 1-1/2 to 2 years to get a finache visa so Linping thought she had plenty time to learn English. I told Linping I would find a way to get Linping to the USA quickly, just have faith in god.

Five weeks later, Linping was on a plane to come to the USA to be with me. I had been showed by god a way to bring her to the USA legally to be with me. I drove to Washington, D.C. To pick Linping up so she would not have to transfer on planes in the USA, which is very difficult even if you speak English. I took her home with me to arrive with rose pedals on the floor from the front door, down the hall to the bedroom, where I had placed several gifts for her upon her arrival.

冯姐叙述去美国签证的故事：和Doug见面之后，他邀请我去美国。我辞了职。为了爱情，放弃高薪的工作，朋友们都问我值得吗？其实我没有考虑太多。我可以感受到Doug的真诚。那时，律师告诉我需要他的一个文件，我告诉他之后，他马上拍照发给我了，但是律师说不行，一定要是扫描件，那时，Doug家里还没有扫描仪，于是，Doug二话不说，在大雪中，开车两个多小时，仅仅是为了那一张给我办签证的扫描件。

签证拿到后，没想到机票又出现了问题，机票上我的名字被漏写了一个字，从武汉去北京倒是没有问题，但是我没法从北京坐上飞机。当Doug知道这个消息的时候，心急如焚，马上联系为我订票的工作人员，但是别人告诉他如果要换，就得多等几天，我也建议多等几天，就是几天嘛，可以省下好大一笔钱，但是Doug不同意，在我坐飞机去北京的路上，Doug已经把一切安排妥当，他直接重新订了一张票，让我们可以早点见面。

Doug家离华盛顿的机场很远，得开车好几个小时，我本可以直接转机的，这样的话，他就不用开这么久的车了，但是，Doug说：这样对你太麻烦，我不想你这么麻烦，而且对一个会英文的人来说，转机都很麻烦，我直接来接你；无数次的感动，我只想说：为了爱情付出，我愿意。http://s16/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfP8xrZB2f&690

After a few days Linping asked me where the people are since we live in a very small rural area. One day she calls out loudly to me, PEOPLE, ONE, and laughed. Linping almost died on methe first two weeks of her arrival. We found out she had a bad bleeding ulcer which was cured in a month by medication. After 30 days I was to contact aperson in the USA, and I was told we could now get married. I told then Linping was only in the country for 90 days, but I was told quickly that she had been given 180 days, which was correct when I checked Linping documents.  I asked Linping if she wanted to get married, she said yes, we went to the courthouse the next day to file papers. We found out we could get married that day and a judge married us in his chambers. That night Linping wrote me a card that said, this is the happiest day of my life, I have a legal husband in the USA.

Each day I would give Linping a card to translate and to express my love for her. I would continue to buy flowers for her as the previous ones died. I started the paperwork for Linping and she had her green card in 7 months from the time we meet.

冯姐叙述在美国的生活：我们在美国申请结婚很快得到了批准，我和Doug在美国的家在郊区，不是很热闹，一向生活在大城市的我，有一段时间非常不适应。那种寂寞和孤独让我无所适从，但是，Doug的爱让我的心渐渐的平静，他每天给我写卡片，送我鲜花，带我出去旅游。我也学着适应这样平静的生活，我每天把家里收拾得干干净净的，做各种美食，认真学习英语。我从一个别人眼中的女强人，慢慢的变成了温柔的Doug妻子。

生活中，我不善于轻易的表达我的喜欢，但是，我眼睛只要长久的看到哪里，他就会记在心里，然后买给我，说是不停地要给我惊喜，丁姐说，她是没有见过像Doug这样的男人，妻子就是他生命中的天，我的每一个细小的动作和表情，都会让他最终变成的我的愿望来给我惊喜。http://s1/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfP9y69a30&690

The first year Linping wasin the USA we traveled 42,000 miles to various places. We made 2 more trips back to china to spend time with her family. Linping has a wonderful kind loving family that I love very much that consist if , son, grandson, daughter in law, 3- sisters,brother, and mother. All of her family has treated me with love and respect. I now have a china family and a USA family.

We just got back from our honeymoon where we spent 6 days in Disney world, 3 days at the beach, and one day to visit her friend in west palm beach.

Linping just got her for implanted teeth today that I promised her to do away with the two partials that she had. She looks so good and she was very happy. In a few months we go on a 7day cruise, and 2 months later we come back to china to stay for 90 days.

I have bought Linping aburial spot beside me and have placed a marker on her grave which I hope we never use for over 50 years. Linping wants to be buried in a tube and happy funeral in USA, and not cremated. I have so noted this in mine and her will. A casket to Linping is a tube and the funerals I have taken her to have been very happy and not sad burials, like some countries.

I came to china to be with Linping in 2013 before January 4, which Linping told me was very lucky, that we would live together for many years and forever. I want to live with Linping forever and I told her one day that I was going to live until 129 years old. Linping looked at me, smiled, and said, husband you will need wife 3 and laughed.

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冯姐跟我说的话：我本来真的是不想写我的故事的，社会很复杂，我不想让有些人感觉到我在晒自己的幸福，毕竟我今年也是60岁的人了，但我真的仔细想想你说的话，仔细看看我的老公为我做的一切，你知道，我在学校里学习语言，老师要我用寂寞这个词造句，我就随意造了一句，下课后，老公来接我，老师表扬我学习的很快，要我跟老公再说一遍我的造句，我就说，我在美国很寂寞，I am lonely in America ，三天后，老公帮我定了回国的机票，你知道我才回国不久，我告诉他，不用回的，我才回去几个月，你知道他说什么，他说，你那天说你在美国很寂寞，所以我就想和你一起回去，那就不寂寞了。

本来我不是那么感受到自己的幸福，但是你的话让我想了很多，从你那里我学到了我们追求的是自己的幸福，而不是“比别人更幸福”，我的确是那么幸运的遇到了我的丈夫，那本身就是真实的，感人的！我发去两张图片给你，一张是他给我买的墓地的照片，一张是他亲手做的我们家的门牌，要我特地写上我和他的名字，我也想通过你的文章，不仅仅是给中国的朋友看，更给那些外国人看看，一个西方男人是怎么样，也可以怎么样对待自己的妻子，希望就此可以引导和改变一些有些错误家庭理念的西方男人。

看着Doug写的我和他的爱情故事，虽然我不是很懂那些英文，但他写的很长，让我心中感慨万千。我不会写华丽的语言，我只是想真实的分享一下我的感受。感谢生活的一切，感谢我的家人和朋友，感谢机构的翻译和老板，感谢我的老公Doug。http://s14/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfPdpHvnad&690

This is a very brief story of our life together. We love each other very much and I would do anything possible to make Linping happy. Linping is very kind, loving, sincere, honest, and trusting. I put Linping on all of my assets and papers after we we remarried to show her that I loved and trusted her. I help Linping do everything which took a while for her to accept because this is not the way of china for men. I have made a will to protect her when I die so she never so has to worry. Linping has started to learn to drive. She goes to school 3 days of week which I drive 500 miles a week. I teach her English each day so we can communicate with each other better as time goes by. We are 2 people from different backgrounds with two different languages, but we love each other very much and I told Linping when we married we become 1. She calls me boss 1 and herself boss 2, and I tell Linping we are both boss 1, we discuss everything together. She asked me one day if I regret marrying a Chinese woman? I told Linping I did not marry Chinese woman, I married her heart and a woman who I am very proud tobe my wife. The only thing I regret is I did not meet you sooner so we could have had children together.

For a longtime Linping wanted to work, I told Linping we were both married, retired, and we would travel as much as possible so I can show her the USA, her new home. I want to see more of china, my new home, to appreciate the history and the stories of herhome country. I brought Linping to the USA to be my wife, but I never want her to forget her heritage and family. Her past and family ismost important in our lives and I have to explain to her, at times, family is more important than money.

My daddy and mommy are gone and I miss them very much. Lumping sister 1 has the same cancer that my first wife had, tnbc, if which there is no cure. She is 4th stage whereas my wife was stage 2. It makes my heart ache because I love her sistervery much and I know what she is going through. I lived with this horrible breast cancer with my first wife for 5 years and I know where Linping sisteris. This is the reason I take Linping back to china for 3 months to spend time with her family.

I prayed many years that I would meet someone like Linping to be with in my life. God chose to make me wait 44 years to meet Linping. I feel god answered my prayers and Linping prayers and put us together for the good things we have done in ourlife. I helped a cripple woman one day out her things in her car while Linping waited for me, and the woman who I did not know, told me, god has a purpose in your life. God has always had a purpose in my life and has blessed me many times. Of all of his blessings bestowed on me. Linping is the greatest gift of all!

I love her completely with all my heart. I love to hold hands with her. Walk with herbeside or in front of me, never behind. I love to kiss her and show her affection that she has never experienced before. She is my soul mate forlife!  WE ARE ONE!

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I prayedmany years that I would meet someone like Linping to be with in my life. Godchose to make me wait 44 years to meet Linping. I feel god answered my prayersand Linping prayers and put us together for the good things we have done in ourlife. I helped a cripple woman one day out her things in her car while Linpingwaited for me, and the woman who I did not know, told me, god has a purpose in yourlife. God has always had a purpose in my life and has blessed me many times. Ofall of his blessings bestowed on me. Linping is the greatest gift of all!

I love hercompletely with all my heart. I love to hold hands with her. Walk with herbeside or in front of me, never behind. I love to kiss her and show heraffection that she has never experienced before. She is my soul mate forlife!  WE ARE ONE!

Without china love, I would never had met Linping. I am very thankful for all the help from this organization, Blake, and the boss.

You gave methe most wonderful woman as a wife in the world. I would not trade her for allthe money in the world. Thank you for all of your help and consideration.

God has aplan for each of us, we just do not know what it is until he shows us! I lovegod and will always follow his direction in life.

You do not have to speak the same language to be in love. Love is universal!

Sometime the best thing in our lives comes to us when we are older and have much wisdom to respect and love it.

GOD GAVE MEAND LINPING OUR DREAM IN LIFE TO LOVE AND ENJOY FOREVER！

说实话，作为为他们牵线搭桥的公司负责人，我挺羡慕冯姐的，因为毕竟不是每个远嫁国外的女人都有她那样的幸运。同样是买东西，我听到有女人去超市买了自己私人的东西放在手推车里，到了付款的时候老公把东西拿出来；同样是建立一个新家庭，我听到有女人去了美国后，看到对方的家其实就是我们80年代不想要的家具，但老外觉得可以用根本不想换，女主人要用很长时间才可以改变对方观念；同样是学外语，我听过老外因为路远，油费很贵，不肯送女士去学习的抱怨，很多个体与文化的差异，酿就了许多的远嫁的故事，也成就了很多因为谦让，包容而最终得到认知的幸福与快乐，但冯姐的故事是我听到的最动听的故事。

我记得卞姐谈到冯姐的时候跟我说过这样的一段话：“别人只看到了冯姐的幸运，但我最了解她，她能拥有今天的幸福和她自身的素质和努力以及付出是分不开的，首先，冯姐本人很漂亮，不说年龄没有人相信她今年会是60岁的人，她很会收拾自己，无论何时，她都是得体大方的，她的性格很女人，说话的声音柔柔的，很有磁力，她是那种智慧型的女人，遇到问题会直接去找我和翻译商量，她非常善于听取别人的意见，虽然她英语一点也不懂，但是她在很短的时间里就学会了用软件写信，后期的聊天几乎全部是她自己完成的，每天坚持聊天和视频，这个是非常不简单的，Doug第一次来武汉的时候，冯姐觉得他穿的单薄了点，直接到就近的柜台上买了一件五千多的棉衣，毕竟都不知道最后的结果，这不是随便一个女人可以做出来的。”http://s12/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfPhBDxF0b&690

作为女人，谁不想成为自己丈夫手心里的宝，谁不想成为老公最完美和最受宠的公主，但这个真的不是每个女人都可以幸运遇到。有的女人一生与此无缘，有的女人要含辛茹苦多年到了晚年才等得到丈夫的承认。http://s6/mw690/001RHt6cgy6KfPiU6Pz55&690

我由衷的羡慕和祝福冯姐，不仅仅是羡慕她的幸运，更羡慕她的明白，这个世界上，美好从来都不是单方面的，如果不是两个人都有洁净的金子般的心，彼此都知道付出包容与感激，再美好的一切也都会被认同为理所当然，那就不可能有任何幸福的感觉，幸福一定是知道来之不易，知道难得，知道我们得到的一切都不是别人应该给你的，知道自己还是要多替别人着想，只要明白了这一点，并去做到这一点，幸福的人只会更幸福，因为懂得感恩，幸福就会永久的赏赐给我们，借用一个读过我的文章的会员的总结：要找到最好的男人 ，一定要做最好的自己！我还想加上一句那就是，其实我们自己的行为导致我们的幸福本身就是一种对社会的贡献，因为这不仅仅是我们自己的快乐，我们的幸福会引领更多的人去效仿，效仿如何对待妻子，效仿如何对待丈夫和家人。

文章结束时我想起Doug在我家里的一个细节，我们不知道为什么提到他在认识冯姐之前养的三只猫，我因为属于爱猫族，属于超级爱猫那种，提起猫来，Doug的话匣子不禁滔滔不绝起来，他把自己手机里珍藏的猫的相片翻出来给我看，我饶有兴趣的让张颖翻译给他，说我一定会去美国看他们，顺便看看相片中那些让我非常感兴趣的猫儿，他像个孩子一样无奈地看着我，似乎有些伤感和失落，原来因为冯姐不喜欢猫，Doug把养了很多年的猫送给了别人。

文章的结尾还是忍不住想跟我亲爱的冯姐说，虽然理解很多人不喜欢带毛的动物，但如果有可能，让我们那些可爱的猫儿回家吧。

还想告诉冯姐，即使那些可爱的猫永远回不了家，但那个男人因为真心爱你，为你放弃自己最心爱的宠物的感觉，永远会让我感慨万千！