Chapter 3
第三章
Cruel Intentions
残忍的意图

Severus opened his mouth to ask something else, but their time was cut short by a knock on the door. Hermione led him out and surrendered him to Harry, who, surprisingly, took Severus' hand in his, and led him throughout the hallways of Azkaban. Severus followed, without issuing a single word of protest, permitting himself to be led as a child.
西弗勒斯张开嘴想问些什么，但他们的独处时间被一段敲门声打断。赫敏将他带出去并将他交给哈利，哈利令人震惊地拉起了西弗勒斯的手，领着他穿过阿兹卡班的走廊。西弗勒斯跟着他，自始至终没有出口哪怕一个词汇的抗议，任由自己像一个孩子一样被牵着。
When they exited from the enormous monolithic structure, and stood at the dock, the chill of the North Sea wind struck against them and Severus shivered involuntarily. However, Harry had no intention of waiting for a boat to take them back home. He had a port-key in his hands, and a brief minute later, they were standing, to Severus' surprise, in Godric's Hollow. After all these years, Severus thought with just a touch of dread.
当他们退出了巨大的整体结构,站在码头,北国的海风迎面撼上他们的身体他们,西弗勒斯不由地哆嗦了一下。 然而,哈利无意等待一艘船带他们回家。 他用了门钥匙,因此短短的一分钟后,他们已经站在戈德里克山谷，对此西弗勒斯很是吃惊。 毕竟这些年来,西弗勒斯认为自己只对这个地点有所恐惧。
Never releasing the grip on his hand, Harry led him to the two-story house that Severus recognized. It had been abandoned for years, after the deaths of James and Lily Potter, but no longer. Once inside, Harry took him on a tour, without saying a word. Severus followed him numbly. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms on the second floor. The first floor contained a den that had been converted into a study room, a moderately sized kitchen, a guest bathroom, and a dining room with a large rectangular table, a set of six chairs, and a fireplace.
哈利带领他进入这所两层楼的房子，西弗勒斯发现过程中哈利不曾放开握他的手。在詹姆和莉莉·波特后死亡，它已被弃置多年，但将不再被废弃了。进入这里之后，在熟悉这所房子的过程中，哈利拉着他，没有说一句话。西弗勒斯麻木地跟着。一共有三间卧室，两间浴室在二楼。一楼有一间书房，一个中等大小的厨房，客用浴室，以及一个有着一个大型的长方形桌子，一组六把椅子，和一个壁炉的饭厅。
“We will eat in about half an hour,” Harry said calmly. “First, you need to clean up. You smell absolutely repulsive.”
“我们将在约一个半小时后吃饭，”哈利冷静地说。 “首先，你需要进行清理。你闻起来太糟糕了。 ”
Severus nodded, not allowing the humiliation of those words to penetrate his awareness. Control yourself. Control. Control.
西弗勒斯点头，不让屈辱的那些话渗透到他的意识。控制自己。控制。控制。
Harry led the way to the shower, and pointed inside. Severus entered, and saw a shower stall – without a curtain. When it became obvious that Harry had no intention of stepping out to permit him any dignity or privacy, Severus stripped off the prison robe, and laid it on the floor. He said nothing – protesting or pleading would only underscore his disgrace, and he had no urge to be degraded more than absolutely unavoidable.
哈利带领他走向浴室，并明确地指向浴室内部。西弗勒斯进去，看见一个淋浴间——没有窗帘。当哈利无意走出并允许他有任何尊严和隐私的意图变得明显，西弗勒斯只好脱去他的狱袍，将它放在地上。他什么也没说——抗议和恳求只是将强调它的屈辱，他还没有退化到逃避那些不可避免的事情。
He entered the stall, and turned the water on, allowing the pleasant warmth to envelop him. It felt shockingly, stunningly, mind-bogglingly good to shower – even in spite of the circumstances. The water ran down his face, rolled down his back, and he bowed his head, allowing his the hot streams to part his shoulder-length hair and rinse it out.
他进入淋浴间，打开水，令宜人的温暖包围自己。令人震惊的，这是一次难以置信的好淋浴——即使是在这样的情况下，水流奔流过他的脸，自他的脊背留下，他低下头，令热流冲散他及肩的长发并从其中倾泻而出。
Memories of summers at Spinner's End resurfaced. Humid days, hot days, rainy days, stormy days, cloudy days, sunny days, days of playing together happily...
蜘蛛尾巷的夏天的回忆再次成为大脑精神的聚焦点。潮湿的日子里，热天，雨天，暴风雨天，阴雨天，阳光明媚的日子里，愉快地玩在一起的日子......
“You are a witch!”
“你是个巫师！”
“That's not a nice thing to say to anyone!”
“这对于任何人而言都不是一件好事！”
“I am a wizard, too!”
“我是个巫师，与你一样！”
“You are that Snape boy...”
“你是那个姓斯内普的男孩……”
The memory of Lily Evans – Lily Potter jolted him from the state of blissful reminiscing. Severus looked up, only to be met with the exact copy of Lily's eyes scrutinizing his naked body with dark disdain. The corner of Harry's mouth was twitching into a slightly contemptuous smirk.
莉莉伊万斯的记忆——不，是莉莉·波特，将他从幸福的回忆中震惊出来。 西弗勒斯抬起头,却恰恰瞧见那双被精确复制了的莉莉的眼睛用黑暗的蔑视的态度仔细观察他赤裸的身体。 角落里的哈利的嘴抽搐成一个稍微轻蔑的笑容。
The surreal horror of the moment shook him up to such extent that his knees buckled. He would have fallen, had there been space in the stall, but instead he only turned awkwardly and slammed into a shower wall. He steadied himself instantly, and turned the water off.
超现实主义的恐怖在这一刻将他震撼到如此地步，他的膝盖都要弯曲了，如果淋浴间还有空余的空间的话，他会倒下的，但现在，他笨拙地转身并撞上了淋浴墙。他立即令自己站稳，并关上了水阀。
“What was that?” Harry inquired coolly.
“怎么了？ ”哈利冷冷地问。
“Nothing,” Severus said with absolute calm in his voice. “It was nothing.”
“没什么，”西弗勒斯以一种具有绝对的平静的声音说。 “没什么。 ”
He dried himself off, and still naked, followed his new Master into a bedroom, where a set of surprisingly normal-looking clothes was laid out for him – a pair of shorts, a pair of dark trousers, and a simple cotton shirt. He got dressed under Harry's watchful eye, and sat down on the edge of the bed – his bed, he assumed.
他擦干身子，仍然赤裸着，跟着他的新主人进入一间卧室，一组令人惊讶的正常模样的衣服摆在了他面前 - 一条短裤，一条深色长裤，和一个简单的纯棉衬衫。在哈利的注视下，他穿好衣服，坐在床沿上 - 他的床上，他假设那是。
Harry nodded to him slightly. “This is your room. Let me know if you want anything else in it.”
哈利向他点了点头。 “这是你的房间。如果在这里你想要别的，告诉我。 ”
Severus surveyed the large bedroom with surprise. It had a double bed, a night stand, a walk-in closet, a bookcase, and a study desk with a chair. He should have been reassured by this – but instead, he found himself more nauseous than ever. The sudden glimpse of civility only served to drain his inner reserves further, and disorient him.
西弗勒斯吃惊地打量卧室。这里有一张双人床，一个床头柜，一个大衣橱，一个书架，和一套带椅子的书桌。他本应该因此放心，事实却恰恰相反，他发现相对从前的处境，他更难以接受现在的待遇。突然受到文明的对待只会进一步消耗他的内心储备，并迷惑他。
“Well,” Harry said unemotionally, seeing the look on his face. “Do you have any questions?”
“好吧，”看到他脸上的表情，哈利毫无情绪地说。 “你有什么问题吗？ ”
“What do you want with me?” Severus asked, surprising himself.
“你想要我怎么样？“西弗勒斯问，这个问题甚至惊到了他自己。
Harry laughed without mirth. “You are forgetting something, Severus. It wasn't my idea to have you here. Although now that you are – I suppose there are some things I can do to make this ... experience worth my while.”
哈利皮笑肉不笑地说。“你忘了一件事，西弗勒斯。令你呆在这儿，不是我的主意。虽然现在关于你–我想这里有一些……值得我去付出我的时间的事情。”
Severus looked up at him, almost forgetting how to breathe. The Master of the Three Deathly Hallows stared back, black fire in his eyes threatening to burst forth. The vulnerable, lanky, frail seventeen year old boy Severus remembered was long gone. Now, Harry stood almost as tall as Severus himself, except Harry's body muscular and built, indicating superior physical strength. His face had acquired a much sterner expression as well.
西弗勒斯抬头看着他，几乎忘记了如何呼吸。三个死亡圣器的主人盯着他，眼中黑色火焰般的威胁迸发。那个脆弱，瘦高个，体弱的十七岁男孩在西弗勒斯的脑海里早已不复存在。现在，哈利站立时与西弗勒斯本人几乎一样高，尤其随着哈利的身体肌肉的成长，他显示出的超强的体力。他的脸更是已经积蓄了了许多严厉的表情。
Quietly, Harry spoke: “You see, the Unbreakable Vow I took requires me to save your life. It makes no mention of me being ... nice.”
哈利轻生的说着:“你看,牢不可破誓言需要我去拯救你的生命。 它却从没有提到过我是…真好。”
“No,” Severus murmured absently, more to himself than Harry. Harry smiled indulgently. “What do you intend to do with me?” Severus asked in spite of himself. He hadn't meant to – asking a question like that was too much like begging, but the tension had become unbearable, and the words fell off his lips of their own accord.
“不,”西弗勒斯喃喃地说,比哈利对自己更心不在焉。 哈利溺爱地笑了。 “你打算对我做什么呢? ”西弗勒斯不由自主地问道。他不想这样–问这样的问题太像乞讨，但紧张变得令他无法忍受，字句自行从他的唇间掉落出来。
Harry closed the distance between them, and towered over him, as Severus still sat on the edge of the bed, not moving. Harry's hand was on his shoulder, and the young, cold voice whispered with intimate cruelty:
哈利将他们之间的距离拉近，将身体置于高于他的位置上，西弗勒斯则仍坐在床沿上，不曾移动。哈利将手放在他的肩上，用年轻的，冰冷的声音亲密而残酷地低喃：
“I intend to punish you, Severus Snape. I intend to punish you for everything you have ever done wrong. I intend to punish you for the murder of my parents, and for the murder of Albus Dumbledore. I intend to punish you for taunting and harassing Sirius Black at the Headquarters of the Order, until you goaded him to rush to his death. I will punish you for ceasing Occlumency lessons with me because an ancient spat with my father was more important to you than enabling me to fight Voldemort and protect my friends. I will punish you for caring more about the motherfucking Whomping Willow than the students it nearly killed. I will punish you for making Remus Lupin lose his job. I will punish you for every time you bullied, taunted, harassed and berated me and my friends. I will punish you for every point you deducted from Gryffindor, fairly or unfairly. And I will punish you for everyone who had died in the war, while you were arguing with your Lord, begging him to let you go and fetch me, and bring me to him.”
“我打算惩罚你，西弗勒斯·斯内普。我打算，为你所做错的一切惩罚你。我打算，惩罚你对我的父母被谋杀，对阿不思邓布利多的谋杀。我打算惩罚你执行的在总部嘲笑和骚扰小天狼星布莱克的命令，直到你的唆使导致他冲上去迎接他的死亡。我会惩罚你，为你停止与我的大脑封闭术课，而那只是因为一个与我的父亲发生的古老的口角，是不是比让我打伏地魔和保护我的朋友对你更重要。我会惩罚你，为打人柳比他妈的差点杀了学生的人值得你更多关心。我会惩罚你，为你令莱姆斯·卢平失去他的工作。我会惩罚你，为你每次欺负，嘲弄，骚扰，并且指责我和我的朋友。我会惩罚你，为每一点你扣除的格兰芬多分数，无论公平或不公平的。我会惩罚你，为那些当你与你的主人争论，乞求他让你去捕捉我，带我到他那里时，在战争中死去的人。 “
Severus heard him out without flinching. “That's quite the list,” he said quietly. “I am not sure I will live long enough to accommodate your grandiose plans, Mr. Potter.”
西弗勒斯毫不畏缩地听着。 “这是一份相当长的清单， ”他平静地说。 “我不认为我会长寿到足以容纳你的宏伟计划，Potter先生。 ”
Harry's hand squeezed his shoulder. “No,” Harry told him in a soft voice. “You won't. And that's why you should count yourself lucky.”
哈利的手捏了捏他的肩膀。 “没有，”哈利告诉他，以一种柔和的声音。 “你不会的。因此你应该明白自己很走运。”
Severus nodded slightly and hugged his body with his arms. He felt a chill go down his spine.
西弗勒斯微微点了点头，抱住自己的身体和手臂。他感到一阵寒意顺着他的脊椎蔓延。
“Well,” Harry said, his voice sounding oddly peaceful and tired. “Shall we go eat? It's time for dinner, and you must be hungry.”
“好吧，”哈利说，他的声音听起来很奇怪，和平和疲惫。 “我们去吃饭行吗？是吃饭的时候了，你一定饿了。 ”
Severus nodded again and stood up, following Harry into the dining room. Once there, Severus sat down, while Harry was setting the table, and flicking his wand, making food appear. The smell of food was almost maddening, but Severus sat patiently, waiting for permission to start eating.
西弗勒斯再次点点头，站起身来，跟随哈利走进了饭厅。到了哪里，西弗勒斯坐了下来，而哈利一样坐在桌旁，弹了弹他的魔杖，使食品出现。食物的气味几乎令人发狂， 但西弗勒斯耐心地坐着，等待着开始用餐的许可。
“You can eat,” Harry said with amusement. “Don't be such a coward, Severus. You don't need to walk on eggshells, thinking that you'll be hurt for breach of protocol. I assure you, you won't be hurt regardless.”
“你可以吃，”哈利像是被他这种行为娱乐般地说道。 “不要这样怯懦，西弗勒斯。你不需要像在蛋壳上行走一样，总想着违反契约你就会受到伤害。我向你保证，你不会无论做什么都受到伤害。 ”
“I see,” Severus said indifferently. He stared at the food in front of him – a dish of rice, small pieces of chicken and vegetables on top. He could not bring himself to open his mouth and start eating.
“我明白了， ”西弗勒斯满不在乎地说。他盯着在他的面前的食物 - 一碟米饭，小块的鸡肉和蔬菜就在米饭上面。他无法令自己张开嘴开始吃。
“What?” Harry demanded, seeing that Severus had not moved.
“怎么了？”哈利问道，他看到西弗勒斯没有动
“I have a request,” Severus said in a barely audible voice. “I want to ... know... who died on our side. During the war. Back in Azkaban, I made a request to see casualty lists, but ... was denied....”
“我有一个请求， ”西弗勒斯用几乎听不见的声音说。 “我想知道……在我们这边……谁死了。在战争期间。早在阿兹卡班，我要求看伤亡名单，但是……被拒绝……”
“Of course,” Harry said. “Well, as you know the Dark Lord died, along with Nagini. Bellatrix Lestrange. Crabbe got himself killed, by his own stupidity.” Harry gave a few other names, including names of some of the Death Eaters. Severus listened impatiently.
“当然， ”哈利说。 “嗯，你知道黑魔王死了，还有纳吉尼。贝拉特里克斯·莱斯特兰奇。克拉布了结了自己的生命，用他自己的愚蠢。 “哈利给了其他几个名字，包括一些食死徒的名字。西弗勒斯不耐烦地听着。
“Mr. Potter!” he snapped finally. “I want to know who died on our side,” he repeated.
“波特先生！“他只得抢先说道。“我想知道在我们这边谁死了，”他重复。
Harry gave him an odd look. “You want to know who died on the side of Light,” he corrected him.
哈利给了他一个奇怪的眼神，“你想知道在光明一方有谁死了。”他纠正道。
“Yes. Please.”
“是的，请讲。”
“The answer is no,” Harry said coldly.
“答案是不。”哈利冷漠地说。
Severus felt a lump form in his throat. “Why not?” he whispered, already knowing what the answer was going to be.
西弗勒斯觉得肿块梗在他的喉咙中。 “为什么不呢？ ”他低声说，却已经知道的答案将是什么。
“You don't deserve to know.”
“你没资格知道。 ”
Severus gazed down at his plate, unable to bring himself to move a muscle.
西弗勒斯低头凝视着他的盘子，已无力让自己的任何一块肌肉移动。
“Eat,” Harry said flatly.
“吃， ”哈利断然说。
For a few minutes, Severus sat in absolute silence. Harry was working on his own meal, ignoring him completely. And then, Severus bit his lip defiantly, as absolute, blinding, overpowering rage flooded him, making him through all caution and common sense to the wind. Severus stood up abruptly, grabbed his plate, and smashed it against the floor. It shattered with a satisfying sound, making the food scatter under the table, staining the hardwood floor.
西弗勒斯以绝对的沉默坐了几分钟。哈利对自己的餐点大干，完全忽略了他。然后，西弗勒斯咬着嘴唇决定挑衅，绝对的，致盲的，强烈的愤怒淹没了他，使他的所有警戒和常识消散。西弗勒斯突然站了起来，抓住了他的盘子，砸在地板。它以一个令人满意的声音碎落，使食物撒在桌子底下，染色的硬木地板上。
At the table, across from him, Harry lifted his eyes and smiled.
在他对面的餐桌上，哈利抬起眼睛，笑了。

... To Be Continued...
待续……