Desperate Housewife

绝望的主妇第一集

第二讲

 

So, what did Carl say when you confronted him?

[_114#_114#] You'll love this,he said...

[_115#_115#] It doesn't mean anything,it was just sex.

[_116#_116#] Ah, yes, page one of the philanderer's handbook.

[_117#_117#] Yeah, and then he got this zen look on his face, and he said, you know, Susan

[_118#_118#] most men live lives of quiet desperation.

[_119#_119#] Please tell me you punched him.

[_120#_120#] No, I said, "really? And what do most women lead lives of noisy fulfillment?" 

[_121#_121#] Hmm.Good for you.

[_122#_122#] I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch.

[_123#_123#] It's like my grandmother always said -- an erect penis doesn't have a conscience.

[_124#_124#] Even the limp ones aren't that ethical.

[_125#_125#] This is half the reason I joined the NRA.

[_126#_126#] Well, when Rex started going to those medical conferences

[_127#_127#] I wanted it in the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home with a loaded Smith & Wesson.

[_128#_128#] Lynnie, Tom's always away on business,do you ever worry he might?

[_129#_129#] Oh, please, the man's gotten me pregnant three times in four years.

[_130#_130#] I wish he was having sex with someone else.

[_131#_131#] So, Susan, is he going to stop seeing that woman?

[_132#_132#] I don't know.

[_133#_133#] I'm sorry, you guys.I just...I just don't know how I'm going to survive this.

[_134#_134#] Listen to me.

[_135#_135#] We all have moments of desperation.

[_136#_136#] But if we can face them head-on, that's when we find out just how strong we really are.

[_137#_137#] Susan,I was just saying Paul wants us to go over on friday.

[_138#_138#] He needs us to go through Mary Alice's closetand help pack up her things.

[_139#_139#] He said he can't face doing it by himself.

[_140#_140#] Sure,that's fine.

[_141#_141#] Are you okay?

[_142#_142#] Yeah.

[_143#_143#] I'm just so angry.

[_144#_144#] If Mary Alice was having problems,she should have come to us.

[_145#_145#] She should have let us help her.

[_146#_146#] What kind of problems could she have had?

[_147#_147#] She was healthy, had a great home, a nice family.

[_148#_148#] Her life was...

[_149#_149#] Our life.

[_150#_150#] No, if Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known.

[_151#_151#] She lives 50 feet away, for god's sakes.

[_152#_152#] Gabby, the woman killed herself.

[_153#_153#] Something must have been going on.

[_154#_154#] Why?

[_155#_155#] I made it,trust me.

[_156#_156#] Hey, hey, do you -- do you have a death wish?

[_157#_157#] No, I just refuse to believe that anybody cans crew up macaroni and cheese.

[_158#_158#] Oh, my god.

[_159#_159#] How did you --  it tastes like it's burned  and undercooked.

[_160#_160#] Yeah, I get that a lot.Here you go.

[_161#_161#] Ha ha.Thanks.

[_162#_162#] I'm Mike Delfino.I just started renting the simms house next door.

[_163#_163#] Susan Mayer,I live across the street.

[_164#_164#] Oh, yeah, mrs.Huber told me about you.

[_165#_165#] Said you illustrate children's books.

[_166#_166#] Yeah, I'm very big with the under-5 set.

[_167#_167#] What do you do?

[_168#_168#] Plumber.

[_169#_169#] So if you ever have a clog or something.

[_170#_170#] Now that everybody's seen that I brought something

[_171#_171#] I should probably just throw this out.

[_172#_172#] Ease up, you little vampire.

[_173#_173#] Lynette, I've been looking all over for you.

[_174#_174#] Are you aware of what your sons are doing?

[_175#_175#] What are you doing? We are at a wake.

[_176#_176#] When we got here, you said we could go in the pool.

[_177#_177#] I said you could go by the pool.

[_178#_178#] Do you have your swimsuits on?

[_179#_179#] Yeah, we put them under our clothes before we left.

[_180#_180#] You three planned this? All right.That's it.Get out! 

[_181#_181#] No!

[_182#_182#] No?

[_183#_183#] I am your mother.You have to do what I say.Come on.

[_184#_184#] We want to swim, and you can't stop us! 

[_185#_185#] Get out, or I will get in this pool and just grab you.Get out! 

[_186#_186#] Get over here.

[_187#_187#] Get -- get over here! 

[_188#_188#] Paul, we have to leave now.

[_189#_189#] Once again, I am so sorry for your loss.

[_190#_190#] Go.

[_191#_191#] Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about my husband.

[_192#_192#] He had other things on his mind -- 

[_193#_193#] things below the surface.

[_194#_194#] The morning after my funeral,my friends and neighbors quietly went back to their busy, busy lives.

[_195#_195#] While some did their cooking...

[_196#_196#] and some did their cleaning...

[_197#_197#] and some did their yoga...

[_198#_198#] others did their homework.

[_199#_199#] Hi.

[_200#_200#] I'm Julie,I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard.

[_201#_201#] Oh, okay.Well, let's go around and get it.

[_202#_202#] Stay.

[_203#_203#] His wife died a year ago.

[_204#_204#] He wanted to stay in L.A., but there were too many memories.

[_205#_205#] He's renting for tax purposes, but he hopes to buy a place real soon.

[_206#_206#] I can't believe you went over there.

[_207#_207#] Hey, I saw you both flirting at the wake.

[_208#_208#] You're obviously into each other.

[_209#_209#] Now that you know he's single, you can ask him out.

[_210#_210#] Julie, I like mr.Delfino, I do.

[_211#_211#] I just, uh, I don't even know if I'm ready to start dating yet.

[_212#_212#] Oh, you need to get back out there.

[_213#_213#] Come on,how long has it been since you've had sex?

[_214#_214#] Are you mad that I asked you that?

[_215#_215#] No, I'm just trying to remember.

[_216#_216#] I don't want to talk to you about my love life anymore,it weirds me out.

[_217#_217#] I wouldn't have said anything,it's just...

[_218#_218#] What?

[_219#_219#] I heard dad's girlfriend ask if you'd dated anyone since the divorce

[_220#_220#] and dad said he doubted it.

[_221#_221#] And then they both laughed.

[_222#_222#] Susan.Hi, Mike.

[_223#_223#] I brought you a little housewarming gift.

[_224#_224#] I probably should have brought something by earlier, but...

[_225#_225#] actually, you're the first in the neighborhood to stop by.

[_226#_226#] Really?

[_227#_227#] Susan knews he was lucky.

[_228#_228#] An eligible bachelor had moved onto wisteria lane,and she was the first to find out

[_229#_229#] but she also knew that good news...

[_230#_230#] Travels quickly.

[_231#_231#] Edie Britt was the most predatory divorcee in a 5-block radius.

[_232#_232#] Her conquests were numerous...

[_233#_233#] varied...and legendary.

[_234#_234#] Hi, Susan.I hope I'm not interrupting.

[_235#_235#] You must be Mike Delfino.Hi, I'm Edie.Britt.

[_236#_236#] I live over there.

[_237#_237#] Welcome to Wisteria lane.

[_238#_238#] Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.

[_239#_239#] Thank you.Ha ha.What's this?

[_240#_240#] Sausage putanesca,it's just something I threw together.

[_241#_241#] Well, thanks, Edie.Ha ha.That's great.

[_242#_242#] I'd invite you both in, but I was sort of in the middle of something.

[_243#_243#] And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun.

[_244#_244#] For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly.

[_245#_245#] Oh, Mike.I heard you're a plumber?

[_246#_246#] But she was reminded that when it came to men...

[_247#_247#] do you think you could stop by later tonight and take a look at my pipes?

[_248#_248#] Women don't fight fair.

[_249#_249#] Sure.

[_250#_250#] Thanks.

[_251#_251#] Bye, Susan.