Nostalgia or Homesickness -意識流裡的"鄉愁"

 

很多人都讀過余光中先生的"鄉愁"[1,5].

 

"鄉愁"是什麼, 不同的人, 甚至在不同的時段, 有不同的含義.

 

有人說, "鄉愁"是一種"思鄉";有人說, "鄉愁"是一種"懷舊";有的干脆說, "鄉愁"是一種"心病".

 

"鄉愁",到底是什麼呢?

 

余光中先生的"鄉愁",是"郵票""船票""墳墓"和"海峽"象徵的那種刻骨銘心的分隔和眷戀.

 

英語富於表達,它是怎麼表達這種意思的呢?

 

一般人們常用兩個單詞, Homesickness和Nostalgia[2].

 

按wiki的解釋: Nostalgia側重"懷舊"的情緒[3], Homesickness則是由於和熟悉的環境(例如家或故鄉)分離而產生的一種不舒服甚至恐懼的感覺-開始還真是作為一種疾病(在軍隊裡很多)提出來的(中國古代, "四面楚歌"是藉助"思鄉病"攻擊敵人的一個例子).

 

從這裡看來,余光中先生的"鄉愁"不能簡單地說成Homesickness或Nostalgia,而是雜而有之.

 

但再根據AHD(American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition, 2002),簡單地說, Homesickness就是"想家", Nostalgia兼有"想家"和"懷舊"的意思.

 

所以AHD認為, Nostalgia本身已經兼而有之了.

 

他,遠離祖國家鄉父母妻子,來到異國它鄉,面臨著陌生的文化和全新的生活,"減壓"的方法就是回憶思念以前idealized(意識裡)的"美好"時光.

 

Idealized, 選擇性的, 就是人們說的"通常是理想化而不現實的",有時"你好像回到了故鄉,它卻使你絕望".

 

它是雙刃劍- A double-edged blade.

 

不知是否含有那種"沉醉"? 那種Lost的感覺?

 

Lost in translation, Lost in shuffle, 但有什麼能比一個identity呢?

 

"獨立千年逢亂世, 橫行萬里對殘陽".

 

"夢裡多聞磧中柳, 人前從不向風啼".

 

以前幾次寫過"鄉愁"[4], Nostalgia or Homesickness?

 

已經過了Homesick的年齡,一個無疆行者,吸引他的應該是那遙遠的絕響啊...

 

NOTE

 

1.余光中的"鄉愁"並英語翻譯(無疆行者丁東,即關東客):

 

小時侯
鄉愁是一枚小小的郵票
我在這頭
母親在那頭

 

長大後
鄉愁是一張窄窄的船票
我在這頭
新娘在那頭

 

後來呵
鄉愁是一方矮矮的墳墓
我在外頭
母親呵在裡頭

 

而現在
鄉愁是一灣淺淺的海峽
我在這頭
大陸在那頭

 

Nostalgia By Yu Guangzhong (translated by Dingdong Wujiang Xingzhe aka Guangdong Ke)

 

When I was a boy
It seemed to be a tiny stamp
Here am I
And there, my mama

 

And when I grew up
It became a voyage ticket
Here am I
And there, my darling bride

 

And then the later
It turned to be a grave
Here am I
And there, my dear mother

 

And today at present
It is a shallow strait
Here am I
And there, oh my mainland

 

2. AHD的解釋:

 

A. nostalgia - A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past. The condition of being homesick; homesickness. [Greek nostos, a return home; see nes-1 in Indo-European roots + -algia.]
B. homesickness, homesick - Acutely longing for one's family or home.

 

3. wiki的解釋:

 

A. The term nostalgia describes a longing for the past, often in idealized form. The word is made up of two Greek roots (νόστος nostos "returning home", and άλγος algos "pain"), to refer to "the pain a sick person feels because he wishes to return to his native home, and fears never to see it again". It was described as a medical condition, a form of melancholy, in the Early Modern period, and came to be an important topic in Romanticism.

 

"懷舊指對過去的憧憬，通常是理想化而不現實的，經常和一個溫暖的童年回憶、某種遊戲或者珍貴的私人物品聯繫在一起". 50年代是一個普遍被懷舊的年代，即使是現，50年代仍在美國被某些人認為是理想時代.這個年代也被理想化為犯罪率低，生活簡單但是不困苦.

 

B. Homesickness is the distress or impairment caused by an actual or anticipated separation from the specific home environment or attachment objects. Feelings of longing are often accompanied by anxiety and depression. These symptoms may range from mild to severe. Homesickness frequently occurs when one travels and may be exacerbated by unfamiliar environments or foreign cultural contexts. Homesickness is especially common in youth. Young people may experience a sense of dread, helplessness, or separation anxiety on their first day of school, summer camp, or on a protracted summer vacation away from parents. Many first-year students at boarding schools or universities also experience homesickness.

 

4.行者近一年來的幾首舊體詩:

 

"聞說新年多祥瑞,凌空萬里是鄉愁"(依十一尤韻隨老馬詠遠方遊子)
"長記當年西風誤,天涯從此是生涯"(登Black Mountain遙想入六麻並兼詠博頭以珠峰為像)
"紫氣割來雲腳長,難從雁路到家鄉"(東山暮望)
"隔海應知兄弟在,扶雲遙看馬頭旌"(遙看)
"萬里家山常入夢,閒來盤點到如今"(臨屏再贈刊兄-“見君詩意起鄉吟”)

 

5. 网上找来的余先生自己的翻译:

 

Nostalgia

When I was a child,
Nostalgia seemed a small stamp:
"Here am I
And there ……my mother."

 

Then I was a grown-up,
Nostalgia became a traveling ticket:
"Here am I
And there……my bride."

 

During the later years,
Nostalgia turned to be a graveyard:
"Here am I
And yonder……my mother."

 

And now at present,
Nostalgia looms large to be a channel:
"Here am I
And yonder……my Continent!"