Po主做了一个网站，叫做一周一个蛇精病，有一期讲的就是麻风哥。

po主全程吐槽，无限高能，上课的时候尼玛给我看得笑出声了！我特么还坐第一排！

摘一段你们感受下：

威廉致力于训练麻风哥管理国家的真正艺术。他没把麻风哥教成一个完全的傻逼——对于威胁只知道跳起来照准面门踹一脚，把人家的牙都踹进脑袋里，等哪天需要 用牙齿确定身份的时候还得做个前脑叶白质切除手术。也是威廉第一个发现麻风哥可能很倒霉的有麻风病：麻风哥小时候跟小伙伴一起玩，当其中的一个小伙伴把麻 风哥的手臂像扭麻花一样转了一圈的时候，麻风哥却完全无动于衷，他还神兜兜的像挥棒球一样抓着一条鳄鱼往那小伙伴的眼睛那儿使了贼劲一挥。威廉一开始以为 这娃正在往冷血无情无理取闹的蛇精病之路上狂奔而去，但是后来发现，那是因为他真的有神经疾病。

William trained Baldwin in the fine art of ruling a kingdom, not being a total douchebag, and responding to any threats to his power by jumping into the air and front-kicking peoples' teeth into their brains so hard that they'd need a lobotomy to obtain the dental records required identify the body. It was William who first discovered Baldwin's unfortunate Leprous tendencies – the young prince had been playing with his buddies, and when one of the kids gave him a really nasty Indian burn Baldwin didn't even act like he gave a crap and just whapped the kid in the eye by swinging a live alligator like a baseball bat. At first, William just thought that this kid was just well on his way to becoming a totally emotionless badass, but it turned out that he actually just had leprosy instead.

http://www.badassoftheweek.com/baldwin.html

吐槽属于作者，乱七八糟的翻译属于我。
先挖个坑，等有空把这篇翻完。尼玛笑裂了好吗！