精明的男人＋精明的女人＝浪漫
Smart man + smart woman = romance
精明的男人＋愚蠢的女人＝私通
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
愚蠢的男人＋精明的女人＝婚姻
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
愚蠢的男人＋愚蠢的女人＝怀孕
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

男人总是花两元钱买他需要的价值一元钱的东西
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

女人总是花一元钱买她不需要的价值两元钱的东西
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need.

女人在找到一个丈夫之前总是为未来担心
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. 

男人在找到一个妻子之后才开始担心未来

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

成功的男人标志是，挣的钱比他的妻子能够花掉的还多
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
成功女人的标志是，她找到了这样一位丈夫
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

要想与一个男人幸福地相守，你必须对他多一份理解少一份爱 To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. 
要想与一个女人幸福地生活，你必须尽量多爱她，而绝不要试图去理解她 To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

结婚的男人比独身的男人长寿，但是结婚的男人更多地想到去死
Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

女人嫁给一个男人，期望着他会发生改变，但他并没有变化 A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
男人娶一个女人，期望着她不会变化，但她却改变了。 A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

女人在任何争论上都拥有最后的裁决权。
A woman has the last word in any argument.

任何问题在男人提出来之后，就变成一场新的争论。
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.