At Xmas time when we were kids,
we were bloody poor,
and Santa weren't too generous
when he knocked upon our door

But we made do by saving up,
yes every little bit
"We may be poor" said dear old Dad,
"but I dont give a shit!"

Our Xmas tree stood tall & proud
and rigid as a totem,
With Xmas baubles hangin' there.....
like testies in ya scrotum!

Everyone loved Xmas dinner,
no if's, and's or but's,
and all us kids would piss ourselves
when Grandpa dropped his guts.

We'd leave a six pack for Santa
and he always drank it quick,
then I found out it was just me Dad,
the alcoholic prick!

But all in all we had fun,
and lot & lots of cheer,
Now I can't wait till I've got kids....
cause I'll get a carton of beer!