It was a long trip. I was sweating. Grandma was quiet and kind of serious, as if she were going to visit someone extremely important. Who the hell was Aunty Dwarf?
As one of the very few women who went to top universities in China in 1930s, grandma was a very dignified and intelligent woman. People around her highly respected her but were a bit scared by her. She seldom explicitly pays respect to others, but this time---. Then, Aunty Dwarf must be Somebody, I guessed.
We went into a narrow lane and entered into a small, smelly, dirty building. It was dark inside. The steps were steep and difficult for me to climb. Each step we made kicked up some choking dust.
The door opened and came out a woman about my grandma's age. She was grandma's cousin. She led us into the room.
The room was small with some sunshine. Everything seemed so old and shabby but clean and in order.
"How are you, aunty", grandma greeted someone in the room.
After searching the room for a while, I saw an old lady sitting beside the big window. She lifted her head without looking at grandma. Oh, her eyes, looked just weird and awful, like two little holes on the dry ground. Then she extended her arms and hands toward us. These fingers were wrinkled and so thin like the twigs of a dead tree. And she was still wearing heavy winter clothes.
That was Aunty Dwarf. I just never expected a dwarf could be that awful-looking. Imagine Snow White living with seven dwarfs look like her.
I was a little frightened and hid myself behind grandma. Grandma didn't say anything but quietly forced me to stand in front of her.
"This is my grandson, aunty. He's 7 years old now."
"Oh--seven years old already! Time flies."
Aunty Dwarf turned to me. She wanted to touch my face and grab my hands. I couldn't move. Grandma quietly held my shoulders still. I closed my eyes. Strangely enough. Her fingers and palms were warm and soft. I opened my eyes and saw Aunty dwarf's silver hair shining in the warm sunshine. She was smiling.
Grandma released me. She quickly put a blanket on aunty dwarf, opened the window, made a cup of hot tea for aunty dwarf, and sat beside her talking. Though aunty dwarf was blind and talked slowly, her mind was clear and she still remembered names of many family members.
I stood aside, waiting for someone to give me a treat. Grandma's cousin came back. She was going to buy some groceries and asked me what deserts I liked. "Don't bother." Grandma stood up and stopped her, "He has enough at home."
Enough is enough. I was really upset. In such a sunny day, I took a long trip, came to this little dark room, visited this frightening-looking old lady, let her touch my face and hands, then, no cookies, no juice, no ice cream.
As soon as grandma and I left the little room, I cried and cried. Grandma did not say anything. She went to the store and bought me a big ice cream. I smiled right away.
"She is so old." I said.
Grandma paid no attention to my words.
"She must be old enough to be displayed in the History Museum of China."
Grandma chuckled, but she immediately stopped herself, and said:
"Don't you ever dare say this again."
Part II At Aunt Dwarf's Story
Another warm Spring day, but nine years had passed. Someone knocked the door. It was one of grandma's cousin. I felt I had met her somewhere before.
"Aunty Dwarf died last night in the hospital." She said.
Grandma burst into tears. Grandpa dropped his cigarette. That night, for the first time they told me the story of Aunty Dwarf.
"She was from a small town where our family once lived.", grandpa said, "Because she was the only daughter, her father was very careful in selecting a husband for her. He finally picked one of my uncles, a young scholar of a rich family and arranged the marriage. Very soon, Aunty Dwarf had two sons."
"My uncle was not happy about his father's control over his life. He took his share of the family assets and left. It was a very turbulent era in the history of China. Anything could happen at any time." Grandpa shook his head, and said, "My uncle was cheated by his partner and his business went bad. All the family members had left for Shanghai. No one could help him. He became addicted to opium."
"He sold everything he had to buy opium. Then he sold out Aunty Dwarf's father's assets. One night, Aunty Dwarf's servant ran into the empty house yelling, 'Madam, please run, run as far as we could. I overheard that Master was going to sell you.'"
Grandma started sobbing, and grandpa went on with the story,
"Aunty dwarf and her servant couldn't find the kids. So they ran away themselves that night. It was true that her husband had sold her to the local whorehouse owner. The whorehouse owner even chased after her to Shanghai. To protect Aunty Dwarf, the servant dressed herself like Aunty Dwarf and led those bastards down a different way at the cross roads."
"Your great-grand uncle, a medical doctor, accepted her. When the Japanese invaded China, Shanghai became the only safe place. Her husband also escaped to Shanghai. My uncle begged Aunty Dwarf to take him back. She did. But a few days later, he started stealing money to buy opium again. She sent him to the hospital to receive treatment. He stole medical equipments and ran way. He disappeared for a while, and showed up again. This time, Aunty Dwarf kicked him out. A year later, we found him dead on the street."
"After Aunty Dwarf came to Shanghai, she began to work for your great-grand uncle in his clinic. She was so smart that very soon she became a lab assistant. After several years of hard work," Grandpa smiled, raised his voice and said proudly, "she became the first female medical bacteria/virus clinical analyst in China. Currently two thirds of the medical analysts in China directly or indirectly are the students from that clinic and Aunty Dwarf was their instructor."
That old lady? I was amazed.
The funeral was split into two parts, one for the general public, and the other for family members, which my grandparents and I attended. Again, it was late April, warm spring time. Still the small room but this time, all the furniture were removed except a small table and a few chairs. A picture of Aunty Dwarf at her late thirties was placed on the wall. Beneath the big photo, there were oceans of flowers.
In that picture, Aunty Dwarf did not look very beautiful but very sweet, especially her smile, so gentle and peaceful. I still remember her hands, thin but very warm and soft.
A mid-aged man came in. He was the head of a hospital where Aunty Dwarf once worked. In her will, aunty dwarf donated her body to that hospital. From a beautiful wooden box the mid-aged doctor carefully took out a delicate glass container. He said:
"We took some of her hair and coiled them into the number of her age. It will be placed at our hospital's history exhibition. We want people to remember her."
Through the glass container. I saw the white hair elegantly displayed the number "88". The silky texture of the hair made that number look so dazzling in the sun, and its constantly changing reflection make me feel that the number was trying to tell me something.
Part III Aunt Dwarf's Words
A few days before my marriage, my father told me that he wanted to see me become a useful person. I knew what he meant. I told him that I could use my hands sewing, cooking, ironing, and do a lot of things. I would devote them to my family, taking good care of my husband, kids, and our big house. A sweet family was all a woman dreamed about.
At that time, that dream allowed me to believe that all the troubles were temporary. Everything would come back just as nice as before. It was not until the time when my husband signed the contract to sell me that I finally realized this dream was shattered. I lost my husband. I am no longer a wife of anyone. I lost my children in the war. I am no longer a mother of anyone. What should I do with these hands? Their value was gone.
These thoughts violently whipped my heart hour by hour, day after day. "Run for your life ---." Like a thunderbolt in the midnight, Ah-zeng's words suddenly woke me up from that nightmare. She risked her life to give me a chance to run. At the cross roads, I held her arms and vowed to look for her if I could get to Shanghai alive. Poor Ah-zeng, I am sorry, I came back too late.
Ah-zeng gave me the courage to finish the rest of the trip. My brother-in-law kindly accepted me and let me live with his family. Soon the Japanese invasion started. My brother-in-law's clinic became very busy. He tried to help as many wounded soldiers as possible. In two days, he had to take some soldiers back to his own house because there were no more beds.
Looking at those young soldiers suffering, suddenly a powerful voice told me that I should do something. I rushed into the kitchen, washed my hands carefully, and came back helping bandage the soldiers. That was the beginning of my medical career. In the next few decades, I spent most of the time in the lab, classroom, and the hospital, and was fully committed to my career. Even after retired, I still worked part time at the community medical center and kept myself busy. My little nephews and nieces often visited me. They took care of me in turn. My life is not lonely any more.
After the first stroke, I lost eyesight. That virtually stopped me from doing any type of work. Nothing can be worse than a life without work. Everyday all I can do is sitting in the bamboo chair, and listening to the falling rain and the blowing wind. During that long and dark period, the only question bothering me was what I could do next. I submitted an application letter for donating my body after death. Waiting for the response was really a torture. The longer the waiting, the more anxiety I accumulated.
However, that day finally came. When the director of the hospital came to my house and handed me their letter of approval, my worry was relieved. I was absolutely thrilled. Perfect! Now, I can leave this world without any regrets.
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