The moving blackboard

  More than one hundred years ago there was a great French scientist with the name Ampere.
　One day, Mr. Ampere went out for a walk in the street. There were a lot of people and much traffic there. But all this was nothing to him. He was thinking about a math problem. He had no paper with him. How could he work it out?
  Then he saw a blackboard in front of him. He quickly walked up to it. He took out a piece of chalk and wrote his problem on the blackboard. Then he started to work on it. The blackboard moved a little, but he did not notice. The blackboard moved on, and Mr. Ampere walked after it. Then he started to run. But the blackboard moved faster and faster.

At last he stopped to have a look. What did he see? Why, the “blackboard” was NOT a blackboard. It was the back of a carriage!

Napoleon’s three questions

A young Swede joined Napoleon’s army. For some time all went well, although the Swede knew very little French. His friends helped him by explaining orders to him and by translating when necessary. The Swede fought bravely in several battles and was praised by his officers.

Then a piece of news came and said that Napoleon was coming to inspect them. The Swede became quite worried, because he had heard that Napoleon would ask some soldiers several questions but he still couldn’t speak French properly. “Don’t worry,” said one of his friends. “We will teach you the questions and the answers. Napoleon always asks the same three questions. The first one is ‘How old are you?’ The second one is ‘How long have you been in my army?’ and the last one is ‘Did you fight in any of the last two battles?’” The Swede’s friends taught him the questions and the answers. During the next few days the Swede’s friends asked him the questions again and again, and each time he gave the right answers.

Then the big day came. The soldiers stood smartly in line while Napoleon inspected them. The general walked slowly along the lines, stopping to say a few words here and there. At last Napoleon came to the Swede. He stopped for a moment and stared hard at the Swede’s face. “You are a new man,” he said. “I’ve never seen you before.” Then he began to ask his three questions. Unfortunately for the Swede, he began with his second question. “How many years have you been in my army?” he asked the Swede. “Twenty-three, sir,” said the Swede clearly. Napoleon was surprised. He looked at the tall man and asked, “How old are you then?” “Three years, sir,” said the Swede bravely. Napoleon was astonished and angry. “Either you or I am mad,” he declared. “Both, sir!” cried the Swede proudly.