加载中…[5.22]《冬之梦》- 菲茨杰拉德
(2014-05-22 06:19:04)Summer, fall, winter, spring,
another summer, another fall--so much he had given of his active of
life to the incorrigible lips of Judy
Jones. She had treated him with interest, with encouragement, with
malice, with indifference, with
contempt.
夏秋冬春，夏来秋去，他将大好年华献给茱蒂·琼斯那张难以对付的嘴。她对他时而兴趣盎然，时而大肆鼓励，时而充满恶意，时而漠不关心，时而轻蔑不屑。
参考：夏去秋来，冬尽春回，然后又是夏去秋来——为了朱迪琼斯那两片难对付的嘴唇，他牺牲了那么多大有作为的光阴。她对德克斯特时而兴致勃勃，时而极力挑逗，时而恶意作弄，时而又无动于衷，时而还对他满脸的看不起。
She had inflicted on him the innumerable little
slights and indignities possible in such a case - as if in
revenge for having ever cared for him
at all. She had beckoned him and
yawned at him and beckoned him again
and he had responded often with bitterness and narrowed
eyes.
找些小事故意慢待，给个白眼，只要是对男朋友干得出来的，德克斯特什么没有尝到过——仿佛因为她喜欢过了他，就得这样报复他一下似的。她高兴时就对他招招手，不高兴时就对他打哈欠，再高兴时就再对他招手，他呢，就常常含着辛酸，半闭着眼睛去应付。
分析：“她高兴时”如何，“不高兴时”如何，虽然是增语，但极其自然，是透彻理解了原文意思之后的再创造。“他呢”，用“呢”隔断单句，是卖关子，也是叙述人对“他”逆来顺受的一种态度。“含”贴切自然。
She
had brought him ecstatic happiness
and intolerable agony of spirit. She had caused him untold
inconvenience and not a little trouble. She
had insulted him, and she
had ridden over
him, and she had done everything to him// except
to criticise him-this she had not done - it seemed to him only
because it might have sullied the
utter indifference she manifested and sincerely
felt toward
她带给他销魂荡魄的快乐，也带给他无法忍受的精神的痛苦。她给他增添了无穷的麻烦，大量的苦恼。凌辱他，欺压他，她都干，除了没斥责过他以外，她对他简直就干尽干绝了。他总算没有挨过她的斥责——据他看，那也不过是因为怕斥责了他，就会破坏她那个面冷心更冷的形象罢了。
分析：She
had him, and
she had ridden over
him, " 凌辱他，欺压他，她都干“是译文句式灵活处；加上“干绝”让语气表现得更强烈。
When
autumn had come and gone, again it occurred to him
that he could not have Judy
Jones. enumerated her glaring
deficien-cies as a wife.Then he said to himself that he loved her,
and after a while he fell asleep. For a week, lest he imagined
her husky voice
over the telephone or her eyes
opposite him at lunch, he worked hard and late, and at night he
went to his office and plotted out his years.
(F.Scott Fitzgerald: "Winter
Dreams‘)
秋来秋去，他明白自己依旧无法和她成婚，这个念头萦绕心头。最终，他还是确定了这个想法。晚上，他躺在床上，内心挣扎。他对自己说，她曾经带给他麻烦和痛苦，列举出作为妻子的不足。但是，他又会对自己说，他爱她，不一会儿，他睡着了。这周以来，只要想到电话中她那沙哑的声音，午餐时那双媚眼，他就会努力工作，直至深夜。晚上，他来到办公室，规划着未来的生活。
参考：秋天来了又去了，他也想到自己跟朱迪琼斯肯定是姻缘无份了。要把这个想法安在心里是不容易的，不过他终于还是说服了自己。晚上躺在床上，他总要翻来覆去思想斗争好一会。他总要想一想为她受过多少烦恼和痛苦，板着指头算一算她做个妻子有哪几条明显的缺陷。可是想着想着心头又会涌起对她的眷恋，过了好一阵子才能阖眼。为了免得想念她在电话里沙哑的话声，以及一起吃午饭时她从对面投来的眼风，他就发奋工作，要干到很晚才歇手，夜里还要去办事处，考虑考虑长远的打算——
就这样接连干了一个星期。
分析：1.
“姻缘无份”译“He could not have Judy Jones.”避免了直译的淡而乏味；
2. ”beat sth
into one's mind" 译“安在心里”，搭配大胆而相宜；
3. for a week
译成“就这样接连干了一个星期”，以破折号断开，放在译文最后，是强调，也是译文结构安排的需要，这样译文在意义层次上就更清晰了，表达效果更理想。
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