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2.5-缚....(2007-02-05 15:46)
    百无聊赖的在网上,游荡于各个论坛间,忽然看到了一幅图,把我的眼球粘住了,“怎么也逃不出这四角的天空”(附图)
    盯了这幅画足足有5分钟,把自己看得都郁闷了。。呃。。。打小就喜欢“自由”这个字眼,我觉得到现在,我仍然不能够理解“自由”为何物,不明白它由谁而生,相对于谁而存,我只是知道,自由不是免费的,嗯,上,freedom is not free..木子的书,上课的时候经常拿来看,很乱的东西,里面到处充斥着血腥,暴力和变态,这就是所谓的PUNK啊?- -搞不明白。。。
    灰色调的苍穹,旁边高耸的楼给人的感觉只有阴森森的。。很不自在,总是觉得,自己被什么东西深深的束缚住了。。。一个魔鬼,卡住了我的脖子,犀利的指甲深深的陷进我的肉里,我可以感觉的到恐怖,所以我不喜欢死亡,亦不喜欢被束缚着,我们一直在追寻着自由,因为我们还年轻着,说得低劣点的话,因为我们还活着。。。
    缚..为什么会存在这样的字眼,它的目的是什么?只是为了捆绑我们,将我们的灵魂带走,留下肉体,在无尽的黑暗当中,有什么意义么?
    或许,创造它的是我们自己。。
 
 
ps:发现我的日志中,日期貌似没有什么大的用处。。
(2007-02-02 21:40)
只是想活得快乐一些
这么简单的要求对于别人来说真的就那么困难么
有点像童话故事
但现在的我活得很迷惘
找不到前进的路
所以懒得再去拼搏
懒得再去争取什么
没有目标的自己
一天天的和罪恶打交道
用狂妄的笑声来麻痹自己
让自己沉浸于烟和酒的世界
如同行尸走肉般
自己说的每一句话
做的每一件事
都是那么的无聊
甚至都有些无耻
我堕落了
以前的自己虽然没有过天使般的纯洁
但是现在却像炼狱里的魔鬼
有时候甚至都会恨自己
真的很想选择一种方式来结束这种生活
希望这一些都能够像梦一般
醒来之后一切都只是一场空
迷失了自己
Lose myself
最讨厌的字眼
反倒用来形容自己
有些无奈
也只有无奈
我已经懒得去拼了
现如今
已经没有什么可值得一拼的了
我放弃了自己
1.30-29.28.27.26...(2007-01-30 10:36)
  其实这篇日子什么时候写都是一样的。。
  某一日,突然打台球的兴致起来了,约上L,在西宫好好的杀了几盘,呃。。我的一天的开始就是这个样子,捎带说明的是,和他打球我迟到了有半个多小时,再次向L陪个不是。
  有很多的偶然,因为我们并不是圣人,也掌握不了未来,所以这些偶然必然会成为偶然。中午和L在一起吃得饭,不过吃得并不踏实,因为还有一拨人在等着我。楚奇于某一日的昨天回京,我们定好了是今天在一起聚聚,很可惜的是两顿饭撞车了-。-||
  唉,又是个很无奈的选择……
   。。。
  回家的路上看到有人在卖仓鼠(卖“仓鼠”的人声称这是仓鼠),因为我也没有见过,所以也看不出了所以然来,只是觉得这个小东西实在是好玩儿的很,令我想不到的是它只值10RMB,不知道是高兴还是难受,这个小东西的命仅仅用10RMB就能转移到另外一个人的手里,换成人行么-。-||。。。
  呃,回家的路上,回头率很高,我只能说回头率很高。
  起初很是担心养不活这小家伙,因为电视上报纸上看得报道太多了,说外面卖的那些宠物大都是病的,买回来没多久就死掉了,一开始确实挺后悔的,要万一传染上鼠疫怎么办呢?要万一跑出来把我爸的那些字画都咬坏了呢?要万一。。。它把我吃了呢?
  3,4天过去了,我们相处得很愉快,小家伙还挺好养活,几片白菜叶子就能解决一天的饭了,我妈说,比我好养活。。。
  过些日子姥姥生日了,我得回老家了,bolg就先暂时放着吧,什么时候回来还不一定。。
我觉得,下次再进家,我可以带只狗进家门了。。。
  我是这么想的,我妈是这么想的么= =
1.25-施主,莫装逼..(2007-01-25 06:35)
  我已经很困了,已经连续奋战了22个小时了,帮公司弄照片大概花了我半个小时的时间,或许更少...但是我仍然觉得今天我有半个小时是虚度了- -|||
  昨天去了趟那个什么斋(全是繁体,认不清楚),看了好多名家的字画,突然发现,他们也很一般...
  楠哥的大奔让人剐了,让自行车剐的,令我感到可笑的是,骑自行车的人下车后捂着脑袋就说头晕,站不住脚,呃...看到他,我想起了大虎,打球NB不行,会撒赖才能赢.看来也能悟出些许的活法.用比较潮流一点的话来说就是:装逼!
  装逼..
  莫装逼,装逼遭雷劈...
  不知道是谁想出的这句话,看似不登大雅之堂的话,用我们老百姓的说法就是话糙理不糙.兴许咱们家长会说:孩子啊,别学那些乱七八糟的东西,纯属扯淡!当孩子们拒绝装逼的同时又会问爸妈:扯淡?什么意思?
    ...
  我个人认为这是一个恶性循环,正是由于中华民族这几千年的劣根性所沉积下来的废弃物.抠字眼的话,应该是成为'废物',毕竟没有被国人们所摒弃,所以还称不上是'弃物',所以只能算是个'废物'..
               -以上观点纯属扯淡,如有雷同,纯属巧合-
  对了,忘记告诉你们,撞车的时候,楠哥的车是停在路边的....
     - -|||...
1.20-ZZzzz....(2007-01-20 12:46)
    睁开眼,发现外面很刺眼。。
    11点了。。。
    。。。
    算了,接着睡吧!
1.19-倒过来?(2007-01-19 10:40)
    回家好像已经两天了,依然憋在家里..
    凌晨收到了姐姐的信息,让我去她公司帮忙...她再度的遭到了我潇洒的拒绝,比以往不同的是,我有点后悔了..
    要知道我假期是从来都不记日子的,发现今天星期五,下周,还是找点活干吧!要不,时间久了,整个人都锈掉了.跟巴克利有着某些相似之处..
  呃...
    真的会变成猪么- -||
    是这个世界太复杂了?还是我们太复杂了?还是因为这一切都是太简单了?
  唉,活着好无聊啊...
    虚度的日子,无意义的活着,无意义的活在这个混蛋世界上...
    困了...
顺其自然(2007-01-19 01:57)

当我发现自己处于烦恼之中
她来到我的面前为我指引方向
顺其自然;
当我发现自己处于黑暗的时空
她来到我的面前为我指引方向
顺其自然;
所有伤心的人生活在这个世界上
将会有一个答案
顺其自然;
即使他们将要分离
他们仍有机会看到一个答案
顺其自然;
阴云密布的天空
依旧有光明
它照耀我直道明天
顺其自然......

我很喜欢的歌词,The Beatles,《let it be》,大家看到的是翻译过来的歌词...有心情的话,不妨去听听..


影子,漫步者..(2007-01-19 01:32)
  高二了,林炳虎告诉我有个人叫做痞子阿姆..
   痞子阿姆?
   呃...
  第一次听<LOSE YOURSELF>,记得当天晚上耳朵里便没有听过第二首歌,Look,if you had one shot,one opportunity.To size everythingyou ever wanted
从那个时候开始的吧,我开始慢慢的认识和了解街头文化,HIP-HOP..
也是从那个时候开始吧,总是喜欢一个人躲在角落里想些东西,一些常人不能理解的问题..
  也许是疯掉了,不是我,而是这个世界...
  青春期的我和家人矛盾激化,厌倦了他们的唠叨之后,经常一个人去大街上溜达...
    松松垮垮的衣服,再穿上一双孩童时代就仰慕的球星的篮球鞋,ipod是必不可少的,大大的耳麦罩在头上,看着街上来来往往的车辆和擦肩而过的行人,觉得那个时候的自己,好像已经从中解脱了,很是自在的感觉,可能是我已经被这个世界遗忘了......
  有的时候真想叫上一群朋友,每个人都一样,但是又那么的不同,漫无目的的游荡在北京的街头,对路上的所见所闻,我们都可以妄加评论,对喧闹感到厌倦的时候,戴上耳机,就好像回到了自己的房间一样,每个人的心里都唱着自己的歌,跟随着歌曲的旋律摆动着自己的身体.
  是的,我喜欢这样...
通常会把它叫做'自由'.
Lose yourself..(2007-01-18 20:50)

 

   Lose yourself

                     --Eminem

 

Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted…One moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the su***ce he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgettin
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
He's chokin, how everybody's jokin now
The clock's run out, time's up over, bloah!
Snap back to reality, Oh there goes gravity
Oh, there goes Rabbit, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that
Is he? No
He won't have it , he knows his whole back city's ropes
It don't matter, he's dope
He knows that, but he's broke
He's so stacked that he knows
When he goes back to his mobile home, that's when it's
Back to the lab again yo
This whole rap ****
He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo

The soul's escaping, through this hole that it's gaping
This world is mine for the taking
Make me king, as we move toward a, new world order
A normal life is borin, but superstardom's close to post mortar
It only grows harder, only grows hotter
He blows us all over these hoes is all on him
Coast to coast shows, he's know as the globetrotter
Lonely roads, God only knows
He's grown farther from home, he's no father
He goes home and barely knows his own daughter
But hold your nose cuz here goes the cold water
His bosses don't want him no mo, he's cold product
They moved on to the next schmoe who flows
He nose dove and sold nada
So the soap opera is told and unfolds
I suppose it's old potna, but the beat goes on
Da da dum da dum da da
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo

No more games, I'ma change what you call rage
Tear this motha****in roof off like 2 dogs caged
I was playin in the beginnin, the mood all changed
I been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage
But I kept rhymin and stepwritin the next cypher
Best believe somebody's payin the pied piper
All the pain inside amplified by the fact
That I can't get by with my 9 to 5
And I can't provide the right type of life for my family
Cuz man, these goddam food stamps don't buy diapers
And it's no movie, there's no Mekhi Phifer, this is my life
And these times are so hard and it's getting even harder
Tryin to feed and water my seed, plus
See dishonor caught up bein a father and a prima donna
Baby mama drama's screamin on and
Too much for me to wanna
Stay in one spot, another jam or not
Has gotten me to the point, I'm like a snail
I've got to formulate a plot fore I end up in jail or shot
Success is my only motha****in option, failure's not
Mom, I love you, but this trail has got to go
I cannot grow old in Salem's lot
So here I go is my shot.
Feet fail me not cuz maybe the only opportunity that I got
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo

You can do anything you set your mind to, man..

 

        -end-