突然觉得博客是给人一种合法的渠道偷窥。
大家喜欢看的应该是一些很具体很细节的生活情景。
只是我似乎有些不乐意，继续写些让人看不懂的有的没的的东西。
取悦了自己，便觉得很足够。
情绪不稳定期就这样悄无声息的过去了。其间我恶劣地对待了许多人。对那个谁谁，对家里人，还有对着路上遇到的不知名的甲乙丙丁。当然了，最后一种的互殴过程在心里迅速上演并迅速落幕。我想可能是我突然很害怕失去。
好在最终他们都包容了我的坏脾气。以致于在某次我控诉忍了那个谁谁的坏脾气的时候，他很愤懑地说是我忍你才对。呵呵。
Thanksgiving day. 虽然已经过了，不过我想还是应该感恩一下。
There's only you that's still the same.
I've paid the price and I'm still paying for it everyday.
早醒。原以为等到了周末终于可以昏天黑地地睡。
参加婚礼的前奏。需要筹备些什么东东？
在脑海里演绎了好几遍可能的场景，最后却只剩下一句话，月月，你找了一个真正对的人。
真正的MR.RIGHT. 他确定一定以及肯定会让你幸福，这简直是毋庸置疑。
短路。
又有些想睡了。
今天听到一位男性友人说了一句非常NB的话，大意是说：不是我们男人喜欢骗人，而是你们女人喜欢被骗。我被噎住大约30秒，脑中如蒙太奇般放映画面种种（内容效果类似自殴30秒Orz），最终只能以缄默来承认这句话其实是十分在理的
。
我承认通常女人爱的是比自己智商高的骗子，这是在走向和谐的过程中一个自然选择的结果*摊手*
。作为一个男人，骗术是要越高明越好的。倘若你没有实力保护唯美画面而导致其分崩离析，那你只能落得一地鸡毛鸭血的下场。充满智慧的Mr.
Ex曾经为了维护世界和平而苦口婆心的劝导我说：“对于所有的男人来说精神出轨那是必然的，你不要活得太精明，这样苦了别人，更苦了你自己。”
于是另一条光明之路出现了----倘若你不能勇敢的退步抽身，那么就要学习睁一只眼，闭一只眼，努力的提高自我催眠的等级。对于所有天资并不算十分驽钝的女人而言，这是一条doable却很残酷的忍者修炼进阶之路。
然而恋爱大约是世界上唯一一个违逆“practice makes
perfect”的事件----试想如果有一项技能你或反复或间断的练习了大于十年，想必应该有卓然飞跃，不然也应该小有成绩。倘若是钢琴，就算你不能绘声绘色的演绎Chopin的fantasy
impromptu，Czerny 299你也应该烂熟于心;
我偶尔胡思乱想，如果用这种在一个人身上领悟到的真诚，去面对今后的生活，对这个人公平与否。当然，答案只能是无解，过去只能让它过去。
又想了一想，现在导致我情绪不稳的因素除了那个某个人以外（当然也可能他没做什么，只是我突然神经就左右不顺眼了——定义为problem
A），又增加了一项——我的工作。我的工作性质就是常常要导致人经历情绪的剧烈波动，这个定义为problem
我现在已经分不清是A导致了B然后重新传导到A使得A加剧，还是由于B直接产生了A然后又传导到B使得B加剧。
COOL DOWN...COOL DOWN...LEAVE ME ALONE FOR A WHILE.
I'm like a swing swing whipping top.
I hate that.
Why am i not happy with so many things
recently. Why
The recent situations remind me of
'It's like the ebb and flow of every
relationship,' Aniston says. 'It's hard; it gets easy; it gets fun
again. What's hard to sustain is some ideal that it's perfect.
That's ridiculous. What's fantastic about marriage is getting
through those ebbs and flows with the same person, and looking
across the room and saying, 'I'm still here. And I still love you.'
You re-meet, reconnect. You have marriages within marriages within
marriages. That's what I love about marriage. That's what I want in
marriage. It's unfortunate, but we live in a very disposable
society.Those moments where it looks like 'Uh-oh, this isn't
working!'—those are the most important, transformative moments.
Most couples draw up divorce papers when they're missing out on an
amazing moment of deepening and enlightenment and
connection.'
She sighs heavily and
turns away to light a Merit cigarette. 'That's not Brad's view of
it,' she says, glum again. 'We believe in different things, I
guess. You can't force a relationship, even if it's your view of
how you would like it to be conducted. Obviously two people leave a
relationship because there's a different thought pattern happening.
My goal is to try and achieve a very deep, committed
relationship. That's what I'm interested in, but it's
someone's prerogative to be or not to be in or out of a
relationship.'
Those beliefs do resonate to some of mine. I believe in ebbs and flows, I also believe in the re-meet in a relationship.
It is called the hardest time
because it's the time to
It it called the hardest time
because we need to know how we get it through under the case that
the problem will never be solved and
It is called the hardest time also because the restoration of a stuff-concerned relationship needs to be accomplished by both parties in it which is out of our manipulation.
After the hardest times, the relationship escalates to aother prosperous scene again.
Maybe this is what Aniston called relationship within relationship, marriage within marriage.
I believe a healthy and lasting
relationship is composed of a seires of hard times and happy hours.
As Aniston said, it's like the ebb and flow. Everytime we get
through the hardest time, we re-meet and reconnect and re-discover
some dazzling diamonds never exposed. I believe it's the diamond
of
I kind of get released a little bit after I wrote down all those words. I still need time to get out of the messy place.
杨老师下周摆酒结婚。
想当年他总是一边欣赏着不同美女不同的优点，一边搞笑地说怎么自己找不到一个。
想当年我给他老婆说，我把杨老师介绍给你吧，她还面露些许犹豫的神色。
现在他们就已结婚了。
事情的发展永远出乎我们的预料。
世界压缩得越来越小了，如果我伤心，现在要去跟谁说呢。
最近我有些多疑。是幻觉还是直觉。
我想可能是因为我突然失去了一部分安全感。
一团乱麻。为什么突然一下子，好多的东西都变得这么复杂，需要精力去想去处理。
“每段关系都有漩涡和波浪，有时很艰难，有时很宁静，有时充满乐趣。最艰难的时刻往往是你想追求一种完美的境界，但那是可笑而不现实的。婚姻最神奇之处在于，在经过了那么多漩涡和波浪后，站在你身边的还是同一个人，你仍然深切地感受到，自己爱着对方。每次争执，总能让你们重新相遇，重新相知，重新相爱，在婚姻中，你们再展开一段新的婚姻，如此永远延续，没有终点。这就是我喜欢婚姻的原因，也是我希望从婚姻中得到的。但是很不幸，我们生活在一个任性的时代里，一遇到问题，首先想到的就是‘糟糕，过不下去了’，那是最重要、决定性的时刻，因为一旦有了这种想法，人们自然而然就签订了离婚协议，他们不知道，自己已经错过互相迁就、互相认错、重新证明爱情的机会，那才是最美好的。但是很遗憾，这不是他的婚姻观。我们的观点完全不同，若观点根本不一致，就无法勉强继续一段关系。我希望获得的是灵魂深处最忠诚的关系，但是他有权选择另一种形式，于是他选择分手。”
--Jennifer Aniston
什么都没有干。把自己闲下来了。脑子里漂浮过很多以前的场景，都是单纯又开心的那种。
突然又想回到过去。精神恍惚。
总能找出时间让自己胡思乱想一下，也是很幸福的事。
我这是怎么了。
Sometimes all of our beliefs were just projections and none of them were true.
Believing those beliefs and being attached to them left us angry and nowhere near the state of objectivity.
Recall the other day we thought that they were just illusions and psychological issues.
But ... how do
Forgot it.
Illusions and realities, right or wrongs, there just left no need and no way to tell from.
