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Related article: "A Class By Himself 10" This is it! The chapter
that has been a LONG time coming! Finally, Tanner and Derrick have
joined 'Ryan and Randy' in the big ten club! That's right, ten
chapters at last! So do a little celebratory dance with us, and
dive in to the BRAND NEW chapter! The first in a long long time! I
certainly hope you enjoy it! And big thanks goes out to each and
every one of you who have supported this story from day one! This
new chapter is for you! :) Let me know what you think at
Comicalitywebtv.net or stop by my website at
http://comicality.gayauthors.org (And don't forget to sign the
guestbook!) "A Class By Himself 10" I put Joel's old wet clothes in
the dryer as I heard him turn on the shower, and started them off
so he'd have something to wear. He had dropped his duffle bag by
the door in the living room, and it looked like he had brought
about as Prelolita Toplist much stuff as he could carry with him.
Knowing him, he had probably stashed it somewhere the night before
to keep me from knowing about it. I just didn't get it. Why would
Joel's mom decide to kick him out of the house? I mean he's
fourteen for goodness sakes. What could he have possibly done that
would be so awful. Then again, thinking back to when I lived around
the old neighborhood, his mom wasn't the nicest lady on the block.
She was one of those mothers that had a child while in her teens
and acted like she secretly resented him for spoiling her 'fun'. I
guess they just got on each other's nerves or something.
Still...that's a pretty harsh punishment for a teenage boy to deal
with."Thanks man. That feels MUCH better!" Joel said, coming out of
the bathroom. I turned and saw him in nothing but his damp boxer
shorts, soaking up some of the warm water from his body. He was
drying his hair off with a towel, and I took the opportunity to
take a good look at him. He had....um...grown nicely since we last
saw each other. He had little wisps of dark hair on his legs now,
and his stomach had tightened up to show some nice muscles
underneath. Not to mention that his chest had broadened out a bit,
and his arms were developing some decent sized biceps these days.
He was far from being some powerhouse, but he was a stud
regardless. It sorta caught me off guard. "Your...um...your clothes
are in the dryer. They should be done in a few minutes." I told
him."Don't sweat it. I've got some more clothes in my duffle bag.
The ones on the outside might be soaked through, but the ones in
the middle should be pretty dry." He finished drying his toussled
hair, and tossed me the towel. "Thanks." His shoulders had gotten
to be pretty wide too. He was really nice looking! It's funny how
you miss these things sometimes while looking through the haze of a
solid friendship.I watched as he walked over to his bag and
squatted down to rummage through it. Taking a brief second to
notice that his ass was a pretty peach in itself. I was in love
with my boyfriend, there was no doubt about that, but I felt
Prelolita Toplist a little blush in my cheeks as a few dirty
thoughts slipped through about Joel. Hehehe, can't hate me for
fantasizing. "If you have anything else in there that needs drying,
you can just throw it in with the other stuff.""That's ok. I've got
something." He pulled an old faded wrinkled tshirt over his head
and pulled up a pair of jean shorts. And my 'view' of him was once
again covered. Not that it didn't stay in the back of my mind, and
probably always would. A moment or two passed while Joel shoved the
rest of his stuff back in his bag, and I decided to ask the million
dollar question. "Sooo....I mean...are you gonna tell me what this
is all about, or what?""What what is all about?""You...being here.
You said you couldn't go home.""I got kicked out. Plain and simple.
My mom hates me and she doesn't want me to live there anymore." He
said matter-of-factly. Then he shrugged his shoulders. "What more
is there to tell?""Maybe telling me WHY you think she hates you
would help.""I don't THINK it, Derrick....I know
Prelolita
Toplist it. She SAID it. 'I hate you, Joel.' No interpretations
neccessary." He said, and went back to digging for other stuff in
his bag. He noticed the silence behind him, and turned around.
"It's no big deal, ok? I don't give a fuck. Fine by me. Besides,
it's just a temporary thing. We've been through this shit before
and she always lets me back in eventually. Last time it only took
her a week before she came looking for me." Did he NOT find this as
disgusting as I did? Was he really that 'used' to being kicked out
of his own house and told that he was hated...that it would stop
affecting him entirely. "Last time, I had to run over to Reggie's
house, and his parents wouldn't let me stay with her because she
was a girl. So every night she would drop her mom's car keys down
from her window, and I slept in the back seat. Hehehe! It was
CRAZY! Kinda cool though...""Joel...your mom...I mean, she CAN'T
just kick you out of the house whenever she feels like it, dude.
That's insane." I said with concern."I TOLD you...it's no big deal.
She's just not herself right now.""Well, whoever she IS needs to be
locked up for what she's doing to her only son."Joel's face turned
serious. "Don't talk about my mom like that. Ok?""I'm just
saying..."He stepped closer, almost getting in my face over it. "I
KNOW what you're saying, and I'm telling you not to. Got it?""Fine.
Sorry." I said, surprised that he would defend her after
mistreating him so badly. "Look..." He said, softening his
position, "...she has a new boyfriend. Some jerk off named 'Ron'.
And the two of them have been into some pretty heavy stuff lately,
and they don't want me around. Especially when they start doing
that 'other' shit.""'Other' shit? You mean...like drugs?""I don't
mean pixie dust." He said, and he pulled some magazines out of his
bag. "Look! PORN! Hehehe! Now we can have good times!" He tried to
avoid the issue, but I think he could see the look on my face that
it wasn't gonna work this time. "Sighhh...will you quit looking so
DOWN already? I'm FINE. I gave her a choice, him or me." And I saw
a tiny bit of sadness creep into his eyes before he covered it up
with a fake
Prelolita Toplist grin. "She picked him. Fair
and square." Then he directed his attention right back to his bag.
"So I've just gotta wait until she gets bored with this guy like
she always does, and then she'll let me come back.""Joel...." I
said, wanting to comfort him, advise him, protect him, and keep
from crossig the line, all at once. "...Can't you...get some help
or something? I mean...there are a few places that you can
call...""No!" He shouted. "No places to call, what are you TALKING
about? That's my MOM! I LOVE my mom, I'm not gonna just screw her
over by calling some stupid 'agency' to come in and ruin her
life.""They're not going to ruin her life, Joel. They can get her
some help. They can get YOU some help.""I don't NEED any help!
Neither does SHE! It was just a fight, Derrick. Why are you blowing
this so far out of proportion?""Out of proportion? You just spent
three hours sitting outside in the pouring rain, miles away from a
home that you can't go back to, and trying to stay at a friend's
house while your mom and some 'guy' go off and do drugs. You don't
find that somewhat strange?""Look, if you don't want me to stay
here, just say so.""Joel...""No REALLY! If you want me to go, just
take my fucking clothes out of your dryer and I'll leave right
NOW!""That's NOT what I'm saying and you KNOW it!" I shouted
back."Watch it, playboy. If you and I start arguing...I'll have to
call an 'angency' on you to help." He said with a snotty tone. Then
he stepped closer to me, lowering his voice, "We're talking DRUGS
here, Derrick. DRUGS. You know what 'agencies' do to minors that
live with single parents involved
Prelolita Toplist with
drugs? They declare her 'unfit' and immediately take me out of her
custody. They take me away, and they put me in some 'home' with
strangers until she cleans herself up. SIX MONTHS, and not a single
day less. She gets put in rehab, I get put in some weird foster
care place, and half a year later they see if MAYBE I get to go
back and live with her again. Is that the kinda help you think my
mother and I need?" He asked.I didn't want to break up his family,
I just....well...I don't know WHAT I wanted. Just...not this.
Reluctantly...I answered. "No. I guess not.""Alright then. Just
keep your mouth shut, and I'll be out of your hair as soon as this
is over." He told me. "Let's just forget about it. Everything will
be ok. I can handle a little rough patch every now and then. I'm
strong enough to deal with it and not break down like some little
kid. So don't worry about me, ok?" He asked, and I nodded. "You're
not gonna tell your mom, are you?""No. But she's gonna start asking
questions after a couple of days when she realizes you haven't been
home." "That's fine. All I need is a couple of days anyway. By then
my mom will have gotten all this bullshit out of her system and I
can go home. I just need a place to crash for a few more days.
Ok?"I looked at him, and he was so....'needy' at that moment. He
would never let it willingly show on his face, but it pushed its
way to the surface anyway. "Alright. But you SUCK for putting me in
this position, you know?" "No I don't. I don't suck at ALL." He
grinned. "But...the girl on page 7 certainly does! Mmmmmm!" And he
threw me a magazine to entice me into letting the issue go. I
couldn't do much more than shake my head with a smile. Joel had
this strange ability to be so confident in his own master plan that
he brought you right along with him. He seemed happy enough, and
trying to push it any further myself would only result in him
pushing back even harder. So...for the next hour or so, I sat down
with him and pretended to be just as interested in the porno mags
as he was. When all the while, I was more interested in watching
him than I was seeing 'Ms. Candy Cane' insert footlong dildos into
places most foul. But I guess it was quality time well spent. Just
me and my bud. Friends forever.My mother came home around 10:30,
and both Joel and I were pretty damn hungry by the time she walked
through that door. You could hear the loud rumble of the car and
the flap of the plastic before it even pulled completely into our
driveway. We instantly ran out to greet her as we heard the keys
turning in the lock and the rattle of plastic bags in her hands.
Meaning food from the diner! We practically robbed her of the bags
when she walked in, and took them into the kitchen for her. I think
she was pretty surprised. "Hi mom! Thanks Mom!" I said, taking them
from her and speeding off. "Well....hello to you too." She grinned
in amazement.We opened up the bags and found a cheesburger and a
half in one, and a extra large slice of pizza in the other one.
Both had some cold french fries sprinkled on the side. There were
only two styrofoam packs, and Joel and I made our picks, diving in
to stuff our faces. My mom looked on with a friendly wrinkle of her
brow. "You boys....I swear." I don't think she expected Joel to be
there that night, but didn't seem to mind either."Aren't you gonna
eat anything?" I asked."Me? Oh....oh no, you boys eat up. I....ate
before I left. Dig in, k?" She said, and then slipped off her shoes
to go and slump down on the couch in the living room. I had my
mouth full at the moment, but as I saw her from the kitchen, taking
her hair down and leaning her head back...I started thinking. Two
of us, two trays of food. Joel was kind of an...'extra' tonight. I
wondered if she had really eaten anything at all. If maybe this was
another one of those 'mom-sacrifices' that she refused to clue me
in on, no matter how much it might have ached her inside. Joel had
no problem nibbling away at his fries and all, but my conscience
started to bother me. So I took another few bites of my
cheesburger, and then got up to warm it up in our microwave. Once
it was done, I took the tray out to her and sat it on her lap. She
had her eyes closed, so she didn't see me at first. "Derrick?
What's this?""I'm full." I said, and just left before she could
force me to take it back. Joel talked to me at the table a bit
more, but my main concern was watching to see if my mom would eat
it. It was like having a pet snake and waiting for it to eat the
mouse you just dropped in its cage. Sure enough...a few moments
later, she opened the container and started eating what was left. I
couldn't help but smile to myself. It felt good. There's no WAY
that MY mom is gonna go hungry. Not ever. She looks out for me, and
I look out for her. That's how it works. For now and forever. I can
make sacrifices to. I just want her to be happy one day.She was a
bit too tired to really wrangle us up at first, but after she
finished eating and rested a bit, she sent the both of us to bed.
She placed a loving kiss on both of our foreheads and left the
bedroom door open a crack as she walked away to catch some sleep
herself. We both laid there, with me on the bed, and him cuddled up
in blankets on the floor. Naturally...Joel and I weren't gonna go
to go out that easy."You got a flashlight? I can look at some more
porn before I go to bed." Joel said."You and your PORN! Jesus, what
kinda freak are you turning into these days?" "What do you mean?
Like YOU never look at naked pictures!" He giggled."I
don't.""Suuuuure you don't.""I DON'T." I protested. "Maybe some of
us aren't as sick as you are.""Hehehe, there's nothing sick about
THIS, dude!" He said, and lifted up a magazine picture where I
could vaguely make out a man on top of a woman, plowing away at her
with her legs in the air. "It's nature....in it's finest form."
"Hahaha! Whatever, weirdo!""Well you should enjoy it a lot more
than I do, ya virgin!"There was a slight pause
Prelolita
Toplist while we smiled at our own comments, but there was
something inside me that just tickled at my sensibilities a little
bit. A huge smile broke out on my face, and I figured...what the
hell? "Who said I was a virgin?"THIS comment...got Joel's attention
instantly. "Psh! Get outta here!" He said, and I didn't answer.
Just grinned while looking at the ceiling. "You're KIDDING me,
right?" "Hehehe, maybe. Maybe not.""GET OUT!!!" He said a bit
louder, and he sat up on the floor to look at me. "No way! You're
LYING!""Nope...I'm telling you the absolute truth.""Holy shit! Are
you serious?!?!" He said, and I started to giggle at his
enthusiasm. "Shhhhh! Hehehe! You're gonna wake up my mom." "WHOAH!
You're not bullshitng me, are you? Damn! What's her name?""I'm not
telling you!" I said. If I DID tell him, he would probably freak
out twice as bad."Aw c'mon! TELL me! It's not like I'm gonna 'know'
who she is or anything!" He pleaded."Nope.""You SUCK!" He said,
then changed to, "Was it good?""Sighhh....the best." I answered,
remembering the times Tanner and I spent together, and how much
magic he had brought into my life since our first kiss."Omigod..."
Joel said, practically bouncing at hearing the good news.
"Damn...my little Derrick is growing up without me!" He gave me a
playful slug in the shoulder and laid back down to stare at the
ceiling with me. "Is she hot? I'll bet she's hot. God, Derrick, the
girls used to ALWAYS go for you at our old school.""Yeah...she's
gorgeous." I said, remembering to not slip up and ever change the
'she' to a 'he' by mistake."I'll bet. Those rich girls are pretty.
They really take care of themselves, you know?" He said. "So what
rich girl let you plug her? Huh? You know, if you get her pregnant,
we'll be set for life!""Hehehehe, don't you mean I'LL be set for
life?""Same difference." He chuckled. "I'm gonna make you tell me
eventually, you know? So don't think you can keep it a
secret.""Whatever. Go to sleep." I said, rolling over on my side
away from him."I mean it, Derrick. If you guys are going out,
you're gonna have to be seen SOMEWHERE together, and when I figure
it out, you're busted." "Good NIGHT, Joel.""Good night....asshole!"
He giggled, and we were pretty much quiet after that.
However...there was something about what he said that stuck in the
back of my mind like a needle. Something that made me open my eyes
and think about it for a bit longer before drifting off to sleep.
Once it had entered my mind, I realized something...he was
right...I couldn't hide this relationship forever. It felt good, it
felt FANTASTIC, and Tanner was everything that I could ever want in
a boyfriend. And THEN some! But...so far...this has all been our
little secret. I mean, how long will it be before someone realizes
just how close Tanner and I really are? Or sees how much time we
spend together? How many times do I bring him up in casual
conversation? The more I thought about it, the more I began to
worry where our limit would be. And what consequences might come
from actually 'coming out of the closet' someday. Evetually, Tanner
and I are going to want to go to the next level. If it lasts, we
might want to be together, visit each other, get a place together,
or vacation together, or just....'hold hands' in public and not
feel out of place or unwanted. There's going to come a time when we
get tired of whispering and waiting for opportunities to be
completely alone to simply tell each other how we feel. And when
that time comes...I just hope I'm strong enough to handle it.
Because that's gonna be a big adjustment for the both of us. The
next morning, Joel had woken up before me and had already taken a
shower before I even opened my eyes. "You're up early." I said
groggily as he got dressed."You're mom is still downstairs. I've
gotta make it look like I'm going to school this morning, right?""I
suppose. Or....you could ACTUALLY go to school, you know?""No can
do." He said. "If anything goes down or looks strange at my house,
that's the first place the cops will coming looking for me. I don't
feel like dealing with them.""Joel, you are REALLY more paraoid
than you need to be, you know that?" I smiled."Paranoid...or
cautious?""Paranoid." I said, confirming my statement."Whatever.
You just make sure you think of me enjoying myself at the arcade
while you're slaving away in 'school' today, Mr. Academia.""Not in
any of the arcades around HERE, you won't." I giggled as I sat up
and wiped the 'sleep' from my eyes. "They don't allow any school
kids into the arcades until after 3 pm. Sorry.""What?" I think I
had ruined his plans for the day. "What kind of stupid fucking rule
is THAT?""One that fortunately keeps the suburban truant officers
off their backs. That's what kind." I walked past him with some
fresh clothes, and gave him a cocky grin. "Have fun."We ate a quick
bowl of cold cereal before leaving, and I went to put on my shoes.
It looks like the rain yesterday had covered them with mud, grime,
leaves, and a stench that could keep Dracula away. "Shit..." I
mumbled to myself."What's the matter?" Joel asked."My shoes are
pretty messed up. I don't think I've got another pair that looks
any better.""Ah...I'd give you mine, but these are the only ones
I've got." He said, and I tried to think."Oh wait, I think I've got
an old pair in the coat closet." I went over to pull them
out...and...um...they were maybe just a LITTLE bit better than the
ones I'd worn before. Meaning they were dry and had more of an old
moldy stench than a fresh 'raw sewage' one. "Well?" I said, and
Joel shrugged his shoulders."Nice pick, Derrick. I'd hate to think
you could do 'worse'.""They're not THAT bad." I said. "Are they?"
He raised an eyebrow, but to hell with it. I was gonna be late, and
this was all I had. Even if there was a small hole wearing into the
bottom of the shoe on the right. "Who cares? I'm wearing
them.""Suit yourself." Joel replied, and finished drinking the milk
out of his bowl before we put them both in the sink and got ready
to go.Joel had to 'pretend' to leave the house a few minutes before
I did, and we both went our seperate ways. I think he's going to
learn very quickly that there isn't a whole lot to do much of
ANYWHERE in this town during the day. So I hope he's got more than
those dirty magazines to entertain himself today.I got on the bus,
and waited impatiently for Tanner's stop. There were lingering
traces of what I was thinking about last night in my mind, and I
DID wonder for a while how to even approach the subject with him so
we could talk about it. But once he stepped a foot on that bus,
looking all well dressed and cute and giving me that heartbreaker
smile of his...my mind went blank. And all that was left of the
concept was how much sex we were gonna have the next time I was
able to get my hands, and my tongue, on him. "Hey!" I said, and he
dropped down next to me."Everything's set." He gave me such an
excited look."What do you mean?""This weekend! It's set. My Mom and
Dad are leaving early Saturday morning, and I'll have the whole
place to myself until Sunday night!""The whole HOUSE?" I asked."The
whole HOUSE! Just you and me." He said. "You can come over early on
Saturday, and we'll take it from there.""Are you sure we'll be
alone?" I asked, still in disbelief. I knew we were going to have
fun this weekend, but this was too good to be true."Yep! I did some
snooping around, my parent's plane won't land until 7:30 pm on
Sunday night. And the only two people left are the guy at the gate,
and our maid, Sascha. But she goes home every weekend to be with
her kids. So...we're practically all alone." He smiled at me, his
hazel eyes turning green right in front of me as his hair slid
forward to curtain both sides of his face. I really wanted to kiss
him at that moment. I mean...I REALLY wanted to kiss him! But
instead, I just grinned back and replied."In that case...I'll be
there. Looks like we've got quite a weekend ahead of us." The
thought of it got me hard instantly, and had the same effect on my
lover sitting next to me. We stayed erect the rest of the way to
school, and I kept springing up a few times in my morning classes
too. Every thought of Tanner and me being free to roam around that
house naked and have all the sex, all the kisses, and all
the....MORE sex...that we wanted, just kept my blood pumping pure
adrenaline every minute of the day. God...this was gonna be GREAT!
We're gonna do it TWENTY times! No...no...THIRTY! Maybe even FIFTY!
Everytime I look at him, I'm gonna kiss him. I'm gonna hold his
hand for the rest of the day, and we're gonna cuddle and snuggle up
on every piece of furniture in the house. And then, I'm gonna fuck
him on his mom's bed and wipe my ass with her pillow! Stupid whore!
Hehehe! I could hardly wait.The morning went by fine, without much
trouble at all. And when I got to gym, I was actually surprised not
to see Chris waiting for me in the locker room as usual. Either he
was late, or ditching altogether. I won't lie...I was kinda
disappointed. He was becoming a very cool part of my day. But
then...as some of the other kids came into the locker room to
undress, I began to realize just how much having Chris in my
immediate presence kinda helped to keep the wolves at bay. Because
they satarted in on me almost immediately. "Hehehe! Nice SHOES,
slug!" One of them said, seeing them sitting on the bench in front
of me. They had maybe been in the locker room for a total of thirty
seconds before they saw that I was alone. "You're looking even
better than usual.""Very funny." I said, and turned my back to
them, just trying to get undressed and leave before it got any
worse."No...actually, it's not really funny at all. You seriously
need some help. Did you take these off of a dead guy or what?" I
didn't answer, just tried my best to ignore them all. That's when
the kid grabbed my shoes off the bench and took a few steps back
with them. "What are you DOING?" I yelled. I grabbed for my shoes,
but he jerked them back. Just INCHES out of my grasp. "Give 'em
BACK!"One of the other boys laughed, "He's got a HOLE in the bottom
of one of them! Look!""Oh man! I don't even think I should be
touching these filthy things! It's unsanitary!" He said, and my
anger and humiliation battled for supremacy in my mind as the
situation continued."Look...just give 'em back to me,
alright?""Come get 'em." He said. "C'mon...they're right here,
dog-boy. Come get 'em."I hesitated, but then stepped over the bench
and swiped at them again, but he tossed them to somebody else, who
threw them into a nearby trash can. "Oops!" He told me, and with
just ONE little nudge of my self control, I would have hit him
right in the mouth! But I'll be damned if I let them beat me. Not
like this.I just walked over with my eyes down, and without saying
a word, I retrieved my shoes and brushed them off. Then walked back
to my locker and kept them on the floor next to me. "LOOK at this
kid! Can you believe this shit?" The boys kept egging me on, but
despite the shame and the rage that was building up inside me, I
kept my back turned and continued to get dressed. "Let's go! It
hurts to even LOOK at you, Slug!" Then I head the crinkling of
paper, and he pulled a dollar out of his pocket. He balled it up
and threw it at the back of my head. "Here's a dollar, bitch! Get
yourself an 'image', for crying out loud!" And they laughed. The
other boys in the room, even the ones that weren't involved....they
all just laughed. Some were kind enough to attempt to hold their
snickers back, or turn the other way...but I knew they were
laughing at me. I KNEW they were. And the only thing that could
have made it worse, is if I had bent over to pick up that dollar.
Even if...deep down...I might have needed it. It was hardly any
money at all, but unlike the rest of them...it would have counted
to me."Har Har Har! Very good, Johnson. You come up with that all
by yourself?" It was the voice that got me to turn around, and I
saw Chris leaning against the lockers with his bookbag in hand. "Oh
great, here we go..." The boy said."Yeah! Here we go! What are you
picking on him for? What did he do to you?" Chris said
angrily."He's polluting my vision." He giggled."And what do you do
when you walk in front of the mirror?" Chris said, evidently
getting a strike past the boy's defenses. The comment made me
smile."What's your PROBLEM, Chris? First Tanner starts hanging out
with this lowlife, and now you. What, are you guys starting a peace
corps or something?""Maybe that doesn't concern you." Chris
replied. Then he looked at the others. "Maybe that doesn't concern
ANY of you. So why don't we just leave this alone and go to
class?""Whatever. You've gotten WEIRD on us, Chris. I don't know
what's gotten into you." The boys started to leave, but the main
kid turned to me and said, "See you later, blondie. I'll throw you
a quarter the next time I drive by the mission." And they giggled
again as they started to leave. But Chris wasn't going to take that
last comment lightly.He stepped in front of the group to block
their way out. "You just can't leave this alone, can you?" He
said."Do you wanna get out of my way there, 'soldier'?" The boy
said, the rest of his little crew backing him up. It was tense
moments like these that you can feel in the stillness of the air
around you. You could tell that a fist fight was brewing, and I
didn't want that. Not for something so stupid."It's ok, Chris.
Really. Don't worry about it." I said. But he paid me no
attention."All you had to do was walk away. But you're little
'comments' just keep coming, don't they?""I said get out of my
way.""Chris...please. It's alright." I told him, but their eyes
were already locked, and I think we were beyond the point of either
one of them backing down.Thankfully, Coach Parker was walking by
and heard the ruckus. He stepped in to stop the conflict before it
became a problem. "Alright, alright fellas. Let's break this up and
get out on that field." Neither boy flinched, but the coach spoke
louder, this time physically pushing them apart. "Let's GO! Don't
make me tell you again! OUTSIDE! All of ya's!""This ain't over."
The boy said."Looks 'over' to me." Chris replied, and I let out a
little sigh of relief as they began to step away from each other.
There was too many of them for Chris to handle. Too many for BOTH
of us to handle. We didn't need the fight.Then...as if I could see
the spark in Chris' eyes...or maybe he could see the previous hurt
in mine...he struck out anyway. As the boy in the front walked past
him, Chris lunged forward and shoved him as hard as he could
against the lockers! The noise echoed throughout the entire room,
and in that instant, they began to reach and swing at one another
with the coach standing in the middle trying to break them up! I
stood back and watched the two of them going at it, and finally
another teacher came in to help the coach keep them apart! "THAT'S
IT!!! I've got an idea! How about we take BOTH of you to the
principal's office! Since your testosterone seems to be so active
today!" The coach shouted, and before I knew it, they were both
being hauled off to the office. The locker room filled up with oohs
and ahhhs and all the excitement that a fist fight can bring to a
roomful of teenage boys. But deep down, I felt kinda bad. Knowing
that Chris might get into trouble just because he was sticking up
for me. I never meant for him to 'fight for my honor' or anything.
I would have let them have their fun and then forgotten about it
later. He didn't have to fight. Still...it was kinda sweet for him
to do so. I don't think anyone's ever done that for me before.
Certainly not here at THIS school. I hope he's alright.The thought
of what might have happened bothered me for the next hour and a
half, and while I was sitting in study hall, I nervously tapped
away at my desk wondering what happened. That's when I heard my
name announced over the school's loud speaker. Telling me to come
down to Principal Payton's office. It caused me to freeze up. And
suddenly, thoughts of this conflict being all MY fault flooded into
my mind. And now...I had to worry about whether or not *I* was in
trouble. The study hall monitor wrote me out a hall pass, and
everyone in that classroom watched me with an evil grin as I walked
up to her desk to get it. They must have known I was in trouble.
They HAD to know. Shit! If only I hadn't worn these STUPID shoes
today! Then those jerks wouldn't have been making fun of me, and
Chris wouldn't have had to fight in the first place! Now I'm gonna
get in trouble and my whole school year is gonna go downhill! I
KNOW it! I worked SO hard! My mom is going to absolutely freak out
when she hears about this!By the time I got to the office, I was
trembling. It was like going up before a judge for a murder
sentence. And when I walked in, Principal Payton had his glasses
on, reading some papers out of an envelope with my name on it. This
was it. I could tell. Something terrible is going to happen to me
right now. My mom's gonna kill me. She's gonna KILL me! "You....you
wanted to see me, sir?" I stuttered."Derrick, yes. Come in and have
a seat." He said, and
Prelolita Toplist I did as I was told.
"I called you down here for a reason, Derrick.""Listen..." I
blurted out in a panic. "...I know what you're thinking."He looked
up at me, and lowered his glasses to the tip of his nose as he
looked at me over them. "Excuse me?""I know what you said to me the
first day that I got here. You said that I belonged here just as
much as anybody else at this school, and I should be proud of
that.""Well, that's true, Derrick.""And I've been trying REALLY
REALLY hard to keep up with all of my school work and everything,
and I've been studying REALLY hard every single day, I swear!""I
don't doubt that, son.""And I know that those other idiots that
tease me for not having money don't mean anything and I shouldn't
let them block me from my goals! And today they were just really
being mean, and I KNOW I should ignore them, but they were pushing
me really hard this time! But I didn't want to fight
anybody!""Fight?""They started it, and Chris helped, and he's a
really good friend. He didn't mean any harm, sir. He was just
looking out for me.""Derrick, I think you may have made a mistake
here..."I was already running off at the mouth a hundred miles a
minute, and my heart was beating twice as fast. "I KNOW I made a
mistake, and I'm SORRY! I really want to do well here, sir! And if
you look at my records there, you'll see that I've worked VERY hard
all semester long without a SINGLE problem in any of my classes!
And I thought...I thought if maybe you can excuse this ONE
incident...then I'll make sure you never have to call me down here
again. I PROMISE!" Mr. Payton sat back in his chair, looked at me
for a moment, and then asked, "Are you finished?""Um...yes sir. I'm
done.""Derrick...I don't know what you were thinking when you
walked through my door, but I didn't call you down here to talk
about a fight or to deal out any kind of punishment.""You....you
didn't?""No. I didn't." He said, and I felt as though all of the
air came out of my chest at once. "Derrick, I called you down here
because we recently sent a letter to your house, and didn't get an
RSVP from you or your parents."I was a bit lost. "An RSVP? For
what?""Well, we're having an assembly this Friday night to
congradulate some of our best students, and you are pretty much at
the top of our list."He looked me in the eye, and I don't think any
of this had sunken in yet. "I'm...I'm afraid I don't understand,
sir.""I'm looking at your file here, Derrick, and according to all
of your teachers, your test scores are through the roof. Your
grades are exceptional. You participate in class discussions, you
demonstrate a high level of comprehension for the material, no
problems with homework...and your lowest test score on your midterm
exams was..." He shuffled through some papers, "...an eighty nine
percent.""Me?" I asked, still trying to grasp it all."Yes, Derrick.
You. You are receiving an achievement award for academic
excellence. We'd like you to attend. If that's at all possible."I
think it was then that it all hit me. Like a meteor from the sky.
"You mean I'm winning an AWARD the day after tomorrow?!?!?!" I said
loudly."Yes, Derrick. That's what I've been trying to tell you,
before you went berserk a moment ago." He reached into a nearby
drawer and handed me an envelope. I treated it like gold, not
taking my eyes off it for even a second as I fel this emotional
wave wash over me. "I'm proud of you Derrick. You worked extremely
hard to earn this, and it's well deserved. You beat out a lot of
our top students for this honor." He said, but I just couldn't
believe it. I just...COULDN'T. "Since we assume that you didn't get
our letter, I took the liberty of getting you a copy along with
some extra tickets to this weekend's ceremony. Do you need more
than three, for you and your parents?"My mouth dropped open, my
mind finally processing the information, but my body not knowing
how to handle it just yet. "A-a-actually...it's just my mom and
me.""Ok. Well, you take the extra ticket anyway, just in case.
Alright?" He said, and folded my file back up to go back to work.
"Make sure you see Mrs. Pickett outside to verify your address for
future mailings, ok? It's important." I just sat there for a
moment, looking at the tickets, and a copy of the letter they sent
out. 'For Academic Excellence'...and it had MY name on it! MINE!
For the first time...EVER...I beat them! I was not only equal...I
was BETTER! Better than ALL of the bastards that got such a kick
out of teasing me and making me feel like shit everytime I found
the courage to lift my eyes from the floor. For once...I was gonna
get the chance to walk on that stage, and claim an award as
concrete PROOF that I was just as good as ANY of them! I was
bursting inside. I didn't know what to DO with myself! I just sat
there staring at the letter blindly until I heard Principal Payton
clear his throat. I looked up at him, and he smiled. "That's all I
wanted, Derrick. You can go now." "Oh! Yeah! Sorry!" I said, and I
stood up out of the chair. "Thank you! THANK YOU!" I said, and
shook his hand, but that wasn't enough. I felt out of control for a
moment, and walked around his desk to give him a hug around the
neck. "THANK YOU! Thank you soooo much! Thank you!" It caught him
off guard, but he just let out a deep chuckle and patted me on the
shoulder. I was almost ready to cry, I was so happy! So I let go of
him and apologized again before I did anything silly. "Sorry...I
just....um...sorry..." I couldn't stop smiling, and nearly ran into
the door as I left. "Sorry. Thank you!"I was in a daze for the rest
of the school day! How did this even HAPPEN? It didn't make any
sense. I had NOTHING! Not like these kids had. I had to fight and
struggle for everything I got. I had to get up extra early to get
on a bus and ride for almost an hour to try and be up to par with
kids
Prelolita Toplist who had personal drivers or cars of
their own. They could afford tutors and extra books and special DVD
learning aids. They had the best toys, the biggest stereos, the
best clothes, the nicest shoes. How in the world is it possible
that I can even stand NEXT to these kids, much less come out on
top? I didn't know. I didn't CARE! All I could focus on was the
fact that I had worked my ASS off, and for once in my life, it was
gonna pay off! I was going to get up there on that stage and stand
shoulder to shoulder with any rich brat that ever took it upon
themselves to laugh at me or call me names. I'm gonna stand proud,
and shove that plaque in their FACES, so they can always be
reminded of the boy they deemed 'worthless'...and came up to be the
best ANYWAY! It was like flying. That's the only way I can describe
it. It felt like flying!On my way out to my locker after last
class, I saw Chris walking towards me and immediately beckoned him
over to find out what happened.
Prelolita Toplist
"Well, I got a lecture or two, but it's not that bad." He said."Aww
man, you didn't get into any real trouble, did you?" "Well...." He
said. "I'm suspended for three days. But it's nothing to worry
about. I already talked to Mitch, and he's gonna wipe the info out
of the computer by the end of the day. He'll fix it, and I'll just
come back to school tomorrow like nothing happened. As long as I
avoid Payton for the next couple of days, I should be alright.""Are
you sure you can do that? I asked."Of course I can." He gave me the
cutest smile. "He's crazy if he thinks I'm gonn be away from you
for three whole days. I'd be a basket case by noon tomorrow."I
paused for a moment, looking at him with admiring and thankful
eyes. Whatever emotion it was that I was feelng at that moment...it
kept me from being able to react right away. Then, I raised both
arms, stepped forward, and I gave Chris a long tight hug. I saw him
blush furiously, and a slight giggle escaped his lips.
"Chris....thank you. I mean that. You didn't have to do that for me
today.""Yes. Yes I did." He smiled. "I owe you a lot more than
that. Consider it my way of attoning for my sins." Then he looked
down and said, "We do have to do something about those shoes
though. You look like a hobo, dude."I elbowed him in the side.
"Thanks a LOT, dirtbag!""Hey, you want 'friendly' or you want
'honest'?" He looked at me for a moment and said, "I've got some
extra pairs of shoes at home. You want one?""I don't need any
shoes. I'm just waiting for the other ones to dry out, that's
all.""Yeah well...THOSE shoes were nothing to strut about either."
He said, biting his bottom lip with a smile. "Listen, what size are
you?""Eleven and a half.""Hmmm...well, I'm about a size bigger than
you, but I've got some nice shoes that'll definitely look good on
you
Prelolita Toplist if you want
them.""Chris...I...I shouldn't...""What? Forget about it. They're
shoes. I can only wear one pair at a time, so I'm not using them.
Besides, Prelolita Toplist I can get more some other time. Just
take 'em and be happy.""But I don't even...""Just TAKE the shoes,
Derrick. It's a gift, ok?""Are you serious?""Yep. And all you have
to do is let me suck your dick once a day for the rest of the year.
Good deal, right?"The only thing funnier than knowing that he was
kidding when he said it....was knowing that he WASN'T kidding when
he said it. "You're awesome, you know that?"He giggled again. "Can
I pay you a compliment now?""Um.....NO!" I said, stopping him
before he had the chance to say anything 'charming'."Ah well, I
tried." He said. "I was just gonna say that you were totally
beautiful and that I loved you with all my heart, but if you don't
wanna hear it....""STOP!" I laughed, and he surrendered. "So, I
hear your getting an award from the school?""How did YOU know about
that?" I asked."Mitch. Who else?""Are you keeping tabs on me?""As
often as humanly possible, cutie." Chris said, and then he caught a
glimpse of the principal coming out of his office. "Shit...I've
gotta run. Congrats on the award, Derrick! We'll get toether soon.
I'll make out with you to celebrate!" He said, and then ducked out
to avoid the 'warden'. That wacky son of a bitch was really keeping
a close eye on me these days. Thank goodness he was on MY side.I
was practically SKIPPING to the bus that afternoon after school.
And couldn't WAIT to tell Tanner about the award! "Wow! Are you
serious! Way to go, Derrick!" He said."I can't wait to see the
looks on those other kids faces when I walk across that stage. It's
gonna be the best revenge ever." I said happily."I knew you were
smart, hon." Tanner took a soft hold of my hand and held it down
where nobody else could see it. "And I'm gonna be right there to
see you give it to them. K?" I agreed. "I'm happy for you, sweetie.
I really am.""So does that mean I can have your allowance this
week?" I grinned."Hehehe, you can have it NEXT week if you want.
I'm spending this week's on something else.""Something else like
what?""My cassette player is kinda old. It almost ate up that tape
you made me for my birthday. So I need another one."I smiled. "You
still have that thing?" I asked with a grin."Of course I still have
it. What are you talking about? I LOVE that tape! It's all I listen
to anymore. Besides...." Tanner blushed a little and whispered,
"...When we're apart...and it's too late to call you at home...I
listen to the part with your voice on it.""You do?" I
asked."Yeah...over and over again.""You better. Hehehe!" I told
him. "You have NO idea how hard it is to put something like that
together and try to make it perfect for somebody else!""Well...you
hit it right on the head." "Maybe...except for my voice. Hehehe!
I'm sorry. That poem I read was....it was stupid..." I started, but
he interrupted me."There was nothing stupid about it, Derrick. It's
still the best gift I ever got. From anybody. It took a lot of
heart and thought for you to do that. And when I listen to it, I
close my eyes, and I remember that somebody out there really loves
me." He said. "There's no better feeling in the world than that."
We were almost at Tanner's stop, and he hated to leave, but we
unclasped our hands and said goodbye shortly after that. Leaving me
breathless with his words alone. "I've gotta go, k?" Then he
whispered really quickly, "Love you!" And he got up with his
backpack on his shoulder."I'll see you Friday night." I said as he
was leaving."And Saturday morning!" He grinned with a wink. And
then he was gone. Leaving me to bask in the sunlight for just a
little bit longer. My mom is really gonna love this. She'll blow
her top! Hehehe! Can't this bus move any faster?When I walked in my
house, my mom was asleep on the couch in front of the television.
Normally I just let her sleep, but this was too big to hold in for
much longer. I just kinda shook her shoulder a bit, and handed her
the envelope. "What's this?" She asked."It's from school. The
Principal gave it to me in his office today." "WHAT?" She said, now
fully awake. "Derrick....oh Derrick, what did you do?" She said.
She sat up with concern and when I tried to walk away she stopped
me dead in my tracks. "Unh-unh, mister! You stay right there!" She
got up on her feet and started to open the envelope to read the
letter inside, hoping that the 'trouble' I had gotten myself into
wasn't too bad. She was so worried. Thinking that maybe I'd do
something to jeopordize all tht she sacrificed for me to go to this
school. Worried that it would be more struggles fo the both of us
from now on. But she read on. I did all I could to keep myself from
smiling, but as she read the letter, I couldn't help it. I was
almost ready to burst out laughing at the look on her face. Her
eyes grew as wide as I've ever seen them, and then she screamed.
"Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! Is this for REAL???" She said."Yup!"
Prelolita
Toplist I nodded. "They just told me today.""Omigod! My little
boy!!! Come here!!!" She said, and ran over to give me a tight hug!
Kissing the top of my head and looking back to the letter to make
sure that it was genuine. She shook me back and forth in her arms
as her joy bubbled over. "I'm SO proud of you, baby! Wow! That's
WONDERFUL! When is the ceremony?""It's this Friday. I know that's
kinda soon, but...""'But' nothing! I can get Janelle to take my
shift at work. I'm going to go watch my SON get his award!"
"Really? You mean it?""I most certainly do! I'm gonna go pick out
what I want to wear tonight!" She said, and gave me a big kiss on
the cheek as she took the letter and put it up on the fridge with a
magnet. I think she was even happier than I was, and that felt
better than anything.The next few days FLEW by like they were
nothing, and before I knew it, I was dressing up in the best
clothes that I had in order to blend in with the 'elite' at the
rest of the school that night. My mom picked out her prettiest
dinner dress and even wore earrings and her mother's necklace. She
looked absolutely beautiful. Stunning! And all we could do
everytime we looked at one another...was smile. Chris had given me
two pair of shoes, 'expensive' ones. He made it seem like he didn't
really care for them one way or the other, but I could
Prelolita
Toplist tell that they were some of the best from his closet.
And Joel, despite being somewhat unenthusiastic about the whole
thing, gave me a hug and wished me luck as he pretended to 'go
home' for the evening. We shared a look, and I still wanted to do
something to help him out, but tonight was so important...and I
didn't want anything to taint it. My mom had a real smile on her
face. A REAL smile. For the first time in ages it wasn't bags under
her eyes and an exhausted half smirk as she tried to stay awake
long enough to make sure I eat something. She was really happy. And
that's all ever wanted. Was to somehow make her happy. I couldn't
ruin that for her. Not for anything. She gave me a kiss on the
forehead as we were ready to walk out the door, and fixed my
collar. "Off we go." She said, a warm smile that almost pt tears in
her eyes. I've never been more proud. Our car was still rusted,
raggedy, and old...but tonight, it was our chariot to something
special. Something that we could both enjoy. We climbed in and
pulled out of the driveway. It's time to stick it to them. ALL of
them. I was gonna grin the whole way there and the whole way back
tonight. At least....that was the 'plan'.We were both listening to
the radio, grinning, celebrating before even getting to the school.
It felt like being a celebrity, and we loved every minute of it.
But....as we got about 10 or 15 minutes away from home....something
went wrong. Sighhhh.....something ALWAYS goes wrong.It began with a
'thunk', like there was something knocking around under the hood of
the car. But I could tell that it was more than that from the look
on my mom's face. The steering wheel of the car began to stiffen
up, becoming very hard to turn to the left or the right. And
despite her foot hitting the gas and the engine sounding like it
was struggling to push us forward, I could feel the car slowing
down anyway. "NO....no no no....come on..." My mom mumbled to
herself. But I guess the angels just weren't listening that day.
"C'mon, c'mon....please don't do this..." She said, pressing the
gas pedal and still feeling the car slowing down.There was no
fighting it anymore. We were coming to a stop, and the best she
could do was to put on her blinkers and pull over to the side of
the street before we stopped completely. The car rolled to a halt,
and she shut it off momentarily. "It's dead....isn't it?" I said
softly."Don't you worry, hon. I'm gonna GET you to that ceremony! I
just....I just gotta figure out.." She was searching, trying to
read the little blinking lights and all as though they could really
tell us much of anything. "...I'm gonna get it to work. It's
just...something wrong in the gas line....or..." She didn't know
anymore than I did when it came to cars. And while I tried not to
show it, I felt a huge stormcloud of disappointment roll in over my
head. "Come ON! Start! START!" My mom said, trying to get the
engine to turn over...just ONE time! She turned the car key harder,
stomped on the gas, stomped on the break, tried shutting it on and
off, tried letting it rest for a few minutes. But nothing was going
to get that car to move from that spot. "Come on baby...don't die
on me, not now...PLEASE not now..." She said, almost in
desperation. But the car refused to answer. Her frustration hit its
peak, and she banged both her fists against the steering wheel.
"God DAMMIT!!!" She shouted, and with a few breaths to try to
regain her composure in front of me, she closed her eyes and laid
her head down on her hands. A long sigh escaped her lips, and she
finally gave in. She hated to do it, hated to even meet my eyes,
but finally, she sat up to say..."I'm sorry, honey. I'm SO sorry."I
won't lie....it hurt. It really HURT to be so helpless in the
course of events. But what could I do? It wasn't her fault. It
would be EASIER if it was her fault so I could have somebody or
someTHING to blame. But I didn't. Neither one of us did. And the
only thing that hurt more than not being able to go....was seeing
the hurt in my mother's eyes...knowing that she had let me down.
"It's ok, Mom. Really." I lied. She turned away from me, and for
the first time...the first time 'ever'...she looked completely
broken. Beaten. Defeated. She hadn't even 'slid by' with a little
luck this
Prelolita Toplist time around. Her little boy had
something special going on tonight....and she couldn't provide for
me. She TRIED...but she just couldn't do it anymore. I watched as
some small traces of tears welled up in her eyes as she lightly hit
the steering wheel one last time. "Mom?""I really just....I wanted
to get you there tonight honey, honestly I did. I'm so sorry. I
know this was important for you...and...I wanted so badly to see my
baby win his award Prelolita Toplist and...and..." She sniffled a
bit, but fought back those tears with everything that she had.
"...I'm SO proud of you, Derrick." She said, and her hands ran
through my blond hair. She looked at me, and a smile spread across
her lips...as the first few tears actually fell from her eyes in
two small streams. She couldn't hold them back anymore, and her
face turned red. "My little boy....my smart, brilliant, little
boy...." She sobbed.I felt choked up, almost guilty for being
disappointed. Guilty for bringing up the award at ALL! And I leaned
forward with a few tears of my own to hug her tightly around her
neck. "I know, Mom. I know. I'm proud of you too." I said. "I love
you so much." And she held me tightly against her."Sniff...come on,
kiddo. Let's grab our stuff and go. K?" She said releasing me and
wiping the tears from my eyes before she did her own. "Let's go.
Grab the registration and stuff out of the glove compartment. We
don't want to leave that behind." She put the blinkers on, and we
opened our doors to get out of the car. Looking around us, we were
maybe three to five miles away from home. Not so bad, I guess. It
could have been worse. Everybody I knew with a car was already at
the awards ceremony, and their parents wouldn't be dragged away to
come pick US up. Well...Tanner and Chris would have...but...I've
caused them enough trouble I suppose. The only way to reach Joel
would be at home, and we all know I can't call THERE. Besides...by
the time we got to a phone from out here, we'd be halfway home
anyway. So my mom and I gathered a few belongings...and prepared
for the long walk back. The long....long...LONG walk back!As we
marched along in the dark, no money for the bus, no money for a
cab...I felt myself getting more and more depressed with every
step. Then more and more angry. It felt like....even when I was
striving to be the best I could be, my situation had the power to
beat me into submission anyway. I'd never get past it. I'd never
rise above it. I was STUCK! And that was just fine with the rest of
them. They didn't care. Just so long as THEY didn't have to deal
with it. I felt myself getting so MAD! I don't know....I guess...I
just REALLY Prelolita Toplist wanted to go to that school tonight
and show those assholes that I was really WORTH something. You
know? I wanted to accept my award with a smile while silently
giving every last ONE of them the middle finger for not being in my
place. They were born with EVERYTHING! Every opportunity in the
world! And I had to struggle up from basically NOTHING and work
three times as hard to even sit amongst them and get the CHANCE to
prove myself worthy. This was my one chance to show them what I was
made of. That I belonged there. And as my feet began to hurt
Prelolita Toplist
and swell from the walk, I really hated myself for missing the
opportunity I had to prove that I was better than them. At
SOMETHING. God knows when I'll ever get that opportunity again.I
think it was the aggrivation of the situation that had gotten to me
more than the disappointment. Walking alongside that oily, dirty
road, all dressed up in our best clothes and NOWHERE to go but
home. I honestly had no intentions of taking it out on my mom. If
anything, she was doing her best to be there for me tonight. But,
in some kind of teenage inner tantrum, my misery was willing to
strike out in what ever direction it could. "This is so STUPID, you
know that?" I said."We don't have that far to go. We'll be almost
halfway home in about another fifteen minutes. It's not so bad."
She replied, trying to walk as fast as I was and keep her breath.
But I had anger to fuel MY strides."But it IS bad, Mom. Don't you
get it?" I said. "If we were rich, we wouldn't have to LIVE like
this!""Live like WHAT?" "Like THIS!" My hatred for 'how things
were' was burning hot at the moment, and I couldn't hold it back.
Not this time. The most agonizing pain in my gut right now was
having those snotty brats from the locker room be right about me
and my 'limitations'. "Don't you get SICK of it, Mom? Eating food
from the same diner every night? Conserving toothpaste and milk?
And....walking home from a piece of shit car that doesn't
work?""You watch your mouth, young man." She said sternly. "Now
look...we may not live all that fancy, but we have what we need,
and we make out a damn sight better than some other unfortunate
people out there.""No we DON'T! We 'get by'. We have JUST enough to
make it from one week to another, maybe a little less. You work ALL
day until you're too tired to even talk to me...and for what? For
this? We can't even go to a stupid awards ceremony because our car
is a piece of garbage.""I TRIED, ok? I said I was sorry." She said,
her anger rising almost as fast as mine was."You tried, sure. And
we're still 'stranded' out here. We don't have ANYTHING!""We have
each other. Isn't that enough?""NO, Mom! It's NOT enough!" I almost
shouted. "There are people at my school who don't do ANYTHING
Prelolita Toplist
for ANYBODY! THEY don't work hard! THEY don't help out around their
neighborhoods! THEY don't struggle to get good grades or go out of
their way to help ANYBODY! And you wanna know something??? They get
ALL the breaks! It just gets HANDED to them, and they throw it in
my face like they did something special to earn it!" I yelled,
tears now rolling down my cheeks. "They get whatever they want,
WHENEVER they want! And they don't have to answer to
anybody!""Derrick...please...let's just walk home, ok?" She
answered, hoping to put this behind us so we could stay 'together'
long enough to make it home. But I didn't let it go. For some
reason...I couldn't."You wanna know what they do when our backs are
turned, Mom? Do you?" I said."Derrick, PLEASE...""They LAUGH, Mom!
They call us names, and they snicker at us behind our backs. Even
Tanner's parents do it. They call us poor and look down on us like
we're just running around and existing in some ant farm or
something.""Derrick, I need you to be quiet now, ok?""I'm SICK of
it! Aren't YOU sick of it! We go out of our way ALL the time to be
good people, and nobody cares! They just tease me, and make fun of
our car, and make fun of my shoes, and treat us like savages
without a BIT of conscience! They don't CARE if we cry ourselves to
sleep at night, just so long as they don't have to ever trade
places with the 'poor kid' and his mom." She didn't say anything,
but I wanted her to. I wanted a reaction. For God's sakes...GIVE me
a reaction!!! "They don't even want their kids to PLAY with me
because they're afraid I'll ruin their lives or something. They
think we're animals, Mom. I have to live with their 'stupid'
comments and their cocky grins...every single day. I try to ignore
the way they look at me and tune out the way that they talk about
me, while God is just continuously showering them with more gold
and forgetting about people like you and me who really deserve to
see some happiness in our lives once in a while. I live through
this every day that I get off of that bus. And all I wanted...was
to go to that school tonight, and
Prelolita Toplist for
ONCE...hold my head up high among them. That's all. And we can't
even do that." I told her. "I'm so tired of this. I just...I wish
we didn't have to struggle so hard just to come back to zero. I
wish we could have what they have. Just once.""Well.........we
don't." She said, and those were the last words she spoke to me for
the rest of the long walk home. I think my anger wore off the
closer I got to our house while hers grew in intensity. And as our
neighborhood came into our vision, I calmed down enough to realize
how much what I said to my mother might have hurt her feelings.
Even though I was too stubborn to apologize on the way home, I felt
heavy hearted. I shouldn't have said anything at all. It wasn't her
fault. She didn't deliberately cause the car to break down. If
anything, tonight was more important to her than it was to me. I
think my anger just kept me from seeing that when I needed to see
it most. We finally got home, and walked through the front door. We
were still dressed up, but now we were sweaty, and dirty, and tired
from what must have been a longer walk than we thought it would be.
I was sure that both Tanner and Chris were right there in the
audience, looking all cute and happy, waiting for me to come out
and accept that plaque. I guess they would be pretty disappointed
too. But what dug deepest into me was seeing my mom pull her shoes
off and sit down at the kitchen table facing the other direction. I
didn't want to approach her at first, so ashamed for my outburst on
the road. But...it wasn't fair to be upset with her. It wasn't fair
to make her THINK I was upset with her either. She once told
me...that all
Prelolita Toplist we had was each other. And
as long as we looked out for one another, we'd be ok. Tonight...I
think a part of
Prelolita Toplist me forgot my part of the
bargain. After all she had sacrificed in an attempt to give me a
better life than what she was currently living through, I had no
right to open my mouth. I don't think I'd ever been more sorry.I
sorta crept into the kitchen behind her, and I heard her sniffling
as she put her face in her hands. "Mom?" I whispered. "Mom...?"I
put a hand on her shoulder, and she used her hand to cover mine
without looking back at me. "I tried, Derrick. I...wanted tonight
to work out for you. I wanted to be there for you and support you.
I just....couldn't get the damn car to work!" She said, her voice
breaking up as sobs took over her ability to speak. "I don't know
what I did, or why it wouldn't work, I just....I
just.....couldn't....FUCKING...." She stopped herself and put up
her hand to take back the vulgarity. "Sorry honey..." She tried to
regain her composure, but couldn't. "I'm sorry I can't do more for
you...like the other parents at that school. I try...but everything
always crumbles down around me and the harder I work...the worse
things get. And I....I just don't know what to do anymore.""You
don't have to do anything, Mom." I said, now crying myself at her
heartbreak. "It wasn't that important anyway.""Don't you SAY that!
Don't you dare. Tonight was VERY important, Derrick, and I'm proud
of you." She grabbed a napkin off of the table and wiped her eyes
and nose with it. She looked up at the ceiling, her tears
reappearing faster than she could mop them away. "You're
right....we shouldn't have to live like this. I wish I could do
more for you. You're SMART, Derrick. You're smart, and you're
handsome, and you're sweet..." She sobbed. "....You deserve
everything those other boys have, and then some. I just can't give
it to you right now, honey. I only wish you knew how hard I try.""I
know you do. I know." "I can't believe I let you down tonight. I
can't believe....I can't..." She began to break up again, and I
moved to sit down in front of her."It's ok, Mom. It's alright." I
said, and I hugged her tight against me. She hugged me back, her
tears running free now, and soaking my shirt as she let go.
"Shhhhh....it's ok. I know you tried, Mom.""I'm so sorry,
Derrick........." She cried outloud. And we held
Prelolita
Toplist each other in that kitchen for the next twenty
minutes. Her tears, my tears, it became hard to tell the difference
after a while.So I didn't get to strut across some dumb stage and
impress a bunch of idiots who probably didn't like me anyway. I had
a hard working mother that loved me dearly, I had a plaque out
there somewhere that told me I was one of the best students at that
school, and I had a boyfriend that was not only gorgeous, but loved
me for everything that I am. Not what I had. When you look at
what's important, you realize how good life really is. And how good
it can be once you take all of the material bullshit out of the
equation. If I live to be one hundred years old...I wouldn't regret
a bit of what I have right now. And I wouldn't trade it in for all
the riches in the world.It's true, ya know? All that glitters is
NOT gold........Some of it's BETTER than gold. Nope, that's not the
end, there's more to come! I want to truly thank you guys for
keeping this story in your heart for as long as you have, and for
allowing it to finally reach the big TEN! It was one of the first
stories that ever got just as much attention as "New Kid In
School", and has remained a favorite of mine ever since. Thank you
all! ((Hugz)) Stay tuned for the next one...you'll like it! Trust
me! Hehehe! And look for the final few chapters of this series and
all the others as the Shack winds down it's final days online! It's
been one hell of a ride you guys...I enjoyed every minute of it!
Let me know what you think of the chapter at Comicalitywetv.net or
just stop by the website at http://comicality.gayauthors.org (Don't
forget to sign the guestbook!!!)
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