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不为别人的批评而不快乐

(2011-08-17 11:09:29)
标签:

霍华

富兰克林

林肯

史丹顿

批评

杂谈

林肯在普林斯顿大学发表演讲时说,他所学到的最重要的一课,是一名在自己钢铁厂工作的德国老工人教给他的。这位德国老人因为战争问题与其他工人发生了争执,结果被丢进了河里。“他走到我的办公室,”舒伟伯先生说,“满身都是泥水。我问他将如何对付那些将他扔进河里的人?他回答说:‘我只是笑一笑。’”
  当你遭遇到不公正的批评时,这句话尤其管用。别人骂你的时候,你可以回骂他,但是对那些“只是笑一笑”的人,你又能说什么呢?

  如果林肯没有学会对那些咒骂置之不理的话,恐怕早就承受不烟台兼职信息了内战的压力而崩溃了。他写的关于如何处理批评的文章,已经成为一篇经典之作。第二次世界大战期间,麦克阿瑟将军将这篇文章抄下来,挂在总部办公室的墙上;丘吉尔也将这篇文章镶在框子里,挂在书房的墙上。这段神奇的话就是:
 
  “如果我仅仅试着去读——更不用说去回应所有对我的攻击,不如关了门,去做别的生意。我竭尽全力去做好,并且始终如一将事情做完。如果结果证明我是对的,那么他人怎么评论也就无关紧要了;如果结果证明我是错误的,那么即使花十倍的力气来说自己是对的,也无济于事。”
 
  当你我受到不公正的批评时,让我们记住第二条规则:
  “尽自己最大可能去做,然后将遮盖自己的破伞收起来,以免批评你的雨水顺着脖子后面流下去。”

  我所做过的傻事
  拿破仑说:“我是自己最大的敌人,也是自己不幸命运的根源。”
  每次我对自己的所作所为进行反思时,它们都或多或少能帮我解决一些正面临的难题,其中最重要的是如何控制自己。
  以前我常常将遭遇的问题怪罪于人,随着年岁渐长,我才发现所有的不幸归根结底责任都在于自己。许多人一直到老年才醒悟过来,结果悔之晚矣。拿破仑在战败被放逐时说过这样一番话:“除了自己,再没有别人应该为我的失败负责。我是自己最大的敌人,也是自己不幸命运的根源。”

  我再给你们讲一个我所熟知的人的故事。他的名字叫霍华,1944年7月31日,他在纽约大酒店突然去世。消息传遍了全美国,震惊了华尔街,作为美国财经界的领袖人物,美国商业银行和信托投资公司的董事长,几家跨国公司的董事,他的去世对社会的影响是不言而喻的。但是这样一个非凡的人物,却没有受过任何正规的教育。他最初的工作不过是在乡下小商店里当店员,后来成为美国钢铁公司的贷款部经理,通过自身的努力,社会地位越来越高,所掌握的权力也越来越大。
  “长期以来我一直保持记录每天工作的习惯,”有一次我拜访他,霍华先生告诉我,“家人从来不在星期天晚上为我安排事情,因为大家都知道,星期天晚上我总是要花一段时间来自我反省,回顾和检讨一周的工作。随着时间的流逝,我犯错误的概率渐渐减少了,而这种自我反思法则一年又一年延续下来,对我的人生大有裨益。”
  霍华的想法可能是从富兰克林那里借用来的,但富兰克林不房屋信息会等到星期天的晚上,而是每天晚上就将当天工作情形重温一遍。他发现自己有13项十分严重的错误,其中三项是:浪费时间、为小事烦恼、争论不休。睿智的富兰克林懂得,如果他不能克服这些缺陷,他就无法取得伟大的成就。为此,他每周选出一项缺点并与它搏斗,并且将当天的输赢记录下来。这种每周改掉一个坏习惯的战斗持续了两年多的时间。正是这种努力,使他成为美国有史以来最受人敬爱也最具有影响力的人物
之一。
Lincoln said in a speech at Princeton University, he has learned the most important lesson, is a steel factory in his work of the German old workers teach his. The old German because of war and other workers had a dispute, it was thrown into the river. " He walked into my office," said Mr Shu Weibo," is covered with mud. I asked how he would deal with those he will be in the river? He said: ' I just smile. '"
When you encounter unfair criticism, this statement is especially useful. Others scold you, you can return to scold him, but for those who" just smile." man, you can say what?
If Lincoln did not learn to ignore those who swear words, would have to bear the pressure and the collapse of the civil war. He wrote about how to deal with criticism of the article, has become a classic. During the Second World War, general Macarthur will this article copied, hanging in the headquarters office wall; Churchill will also this article inlaid in the frame, hanging on the wall of my study. The magic words:
" If I just try to read -- not to mention to respond to all against me, not closing the door, to do other business. I strain every nerve to do be consistent from beginning to end, and get things done. If it turns out I was right, then others will be of no great importance on; if it turns out I was wrong, even if spend ten times the effort that he is right, also be of no avail."
When you and I are unfair criticism, let us remember second rules:
" Do our best to do, and then cover your broken umbrella, so as not to criticize your rain down the back of the neck to flow down."
I've done stupid things
Napoleon said:" my own worst enemy, but also their unfortunate fate of roots."
Every time I own the doings for reflection, they are more or less can help me to solve some problems, of which the most important is how to control myself.
I often encounter problems to blame, as we grow, I found that all the misfortunes in the final analysis is their responsibility. Many people have been to the older just wake up, it is too late. Napoleon was defeated when in exile said:" in addition to yourself, no one else should I be responsible for the failure of. My own worst enemy, but also their unfortunate fate of roots."
I'll give you about a person I know the story. His name is Huo Hua, in July 31, 1944, he died suddenly in New York hotel. The news spread throughout the USA, stunned Wall Street, as the United States financial leader, the United States commercial bank and trust company, a few multinational company director, his death the social impact is self-evident. But such an extraordinary character, without any formal education. His first job was in the little country store clerk, later to become the United States steel corporation loan manager, through their own efforts, social status is high, the power is more and more big.
" I have long maintained records of daily work habits," one time I visit him, Mr. Huo Hua told me," the family never on Sunday night to arrange my things, as we all know, Sunday night I always spend a period of time from reflection, review and review of the week's work. With the passage of time, I made a mistake probability gradually reduced, and this kind of self reflection law years continued down, be of great advantage to me in my life."
Huo Hua's ideas may be borrowed from Franklin, but Franklin can't wait until Sunday evening, but every night will be the work of reviewing. He found himself with 13 very serious errors, three of which are: a waste of time, worry about trifles, arguing. The brilliant Franklin know, if he cannot overcome these defects, he could not have made great achievements. To this end, he selected a weekly faults and fight with it, and the day of the winning record. This week get rid of a bad habit battle lasted more than two years of time. It is this effort, causes him to become the United States one of history's most beloved and most influential figures
One of.
Albert Herbert said:" each person at least five minutes every day is stupid. Wisdom is how one does not exceed the limit of five minutes."
The foolish man suffered a little criticism will get desperation, and smart people are eagerly hope from those who blame them, opposed them, hinders them learn more lessons. The famous American poet Whitman said:" don't you all just from those who admire you, praise you, and stand together with you people have learned? From those who oppose you, blame you, stop you people have learned not more?"
Don't wait for the enemy to criticize us, at this point to exceed their. We should do our worst enemies in critics, accusing us before finding out all his faults and correct them. Darwin is in accordance with the principles of do, when he finished the immortal monumental work" theory of evolution", he realized, this revolutionary insights on evolution of books once published the whole intellectual and religious doubts. To this end, he repeatedly self-criticism, spent 15 years of time to reexamine their own data, repeated study his theories, to conclude with criticism.
If someone called you an idiot, what will you do? Angry? Feel insulted? Have a look of Lincoln is done. At one time, the Minister of war Edward Stanton called Lincoln is an idiot. The reason for this is because Lincoln direct interference in Stanton business, Lincoln to please a selfish politician, issued a command, to mobilize troops. Stanton not only refuses to execute the command and at Lincoln, Lincoln. And what 's the result? When Lincoln heard Stanton accusations, very calmly replied:" if the Stanton said I am an idiot, I must be an idiot, because he almost never make mistakes. I have to go take a look at."
Lincoln was to see Stanton, Stanton explained to him the issuance of the order the possible consequences, so Lincoln recalled every. As long as the sincerity of the criticism, and have enough facts, has certain constructive, Lincoln would be very happy to accept.
You should be willing to accept such criticism, no one can do not to do wrong, or even can not guarantee to do 3/4 things. When Roosevelt moves to the White House, he expressed the hope that he can do. The world's most famous scientist Einstein also admitted that he thought the ninety-nine percent time is wrong.
Roache party card said: "the enemy 's opinion, than our own opinion is more close to the truth."
In most cases I know this sentence is right, but when someone criticize me, a little attention will immediately instinctively defends himself -- and did not even know what the critics say some what. As such, I am always very upset, people don't like to accept criticism, always like to hear a compliment, and altogether regardless of the praise or criticism is fair. Man is not a logical biological, but a kind of emotion in animals, we thought logic as a canoe, in the deep, dark and full of emotional sea drift.
Investment in the stock market prediction is always on the wrong, short fault on are normal, calm in the face of the stock market rise and fall is more important than criticism, because criticism and blame market would make you money. Investment in the stock market the best evaluation is you in the stock market whether making money, rather than how much you complain voice. Our stock is kept high to complain is the best answer!
  阿尔伯特赫伯特说:“每个人每天至少有五分钟是愚蠢的。所谓智慧就是一个人如何不超过这五分钟的限度。”
  愚蠢的人遭受一点儿批评就会气急败坏,而聪明的人却急切地希望从那些责备他们、反对他们、阻碍他们的人那里学到更多的经验教训。美国著名诗人惠特曼如是说:“难道你的一切只是从那些羡慕你、恭维你、和你站在一起的人身上学来的吗?从那些反对你、指责你、阻挡你的人那里学到的东西岂不是更多?”
  不要等待我们的敌人来批评我们,在这一点上要超越他们。我们要做自己最严格的批评者,要在敌人指责我们之前找出自己所有的缺点并加以改正。达尔文正是按照这一原则做的,当他完成那本不朽巨著《进化论》时,他意识到,这本对生物进化具有革命性见解的书一旦出版会使整个知识界和宗教界产生动摇。为此,他反复自我批评,花费了15年时间重新检查自己的资料,反复研究自己所提出的理论,对自己得出的结论进行批评。
  如果有人骂你是一个笨蛋,你会怎么办呢?生气?觉得受到了侮辱吗?看看林肯是怎样做的。有一次,作战部长爱德华史丹顿骂林肯是一个笨蛋。之所以如此是因为林肯直接干涉了史丹顿的业务,当时林肯为了取悦一名自私的政客,签发了一项命令,调动部分军队。史丹顿不仅拒绝执行林肯的命令,而且大骂林肯愚蠢。结果如何?当林肯听到史丹顿的指责后,十分平静地回答:“如果史丹顿说我是个笨蛋,那我一定就是个笨蛋,因为他几乎从来没有出过错。我得亲自去看一看。”
  林肯果然去见史丹顿,史丹顿向他解释了签发这项命令可能带来的后果,于是林肯收回了成命。只要是诚意的批评,并且有足够的事实依据,具有一定的建设性,林肯都非常乐意接受。
  你我也应该乐于接受这样的批评,没有人能做到不做错事,甚至无法保证能做对四分之三的事情。当罗斯福入主白宫时,他表示希望自己能够做到。世界上最著名的科学家爱因斯坦也承认自己的思想百分之九十九的时候都是错误的。
  罗契方卡说:“敌人的意见,要比我们自己的意见更接近于事实。”
  大多数情况下我知道这句话是对的,可每当有人批评我时,稍不留意就会立即本能地为自己辩护——甚至根本不知道批评我的人在说些什么。每当如此,我总是非常懊恼,人们都不喜欢接受批评,总是希望听到别人的赞美,而全然不管这些批评或赞美是否公正。人并不是一种逻辑的生物,而是一种情感动物,我们的思想逻辑如同一叶独木舟,在深邃、黑暗的充满的情感之海里漂泊。
 
   股市投资预测总是有对有错,短期的错对都很正常,坦然的面对股市的上涨和下跌比批评本身更重要,因为批评和埋怨股市不会让你赚钱。股市投资最好的评价是你在股市里面是否赚钱,而不是你抱怨的声音有多大。我们的股票不断的新高就是对抱怨最好的回答!
 

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