Thanks to: Lazarus British Columbia Canada

A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns to tell their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, hook, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" 
The pirate replies "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off". 
"Wow!" said the seaman. "What about the hook"? 
"Well...", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand clean off." 
"Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"? 
"A seagull dropping fell into my eye", replied the pirate. 
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked. 
"Well..." said the pirate, "That was my first day with the hook."

    一个海员在酒吧里遇到了一个海盗,他们聊起了海上的冒险故事. 海员注意到海盗装了一条假腿,一只钩手和一只义眼. 他很好奇,问;"你怎么装了一条假腿?"

    海盗回答:"我是探身到船外去训练鲨鱼.正当他们把我往外拉的时候,鲨鱼咬掉了我的腿."

   "哦!" 海员说,"那你的铁手呢?"

   "哎..."海盗回答,"我们在登敌人的船时,和那些水手用刺刀搏斗.一个敌人把我的手砍了."

   "不可思议!" 海员惊叹."你的眼睛又是怎么回事呢?"

   "一只海鸥落下要了我的眼睛." 海盗回答.

   "海鸥摘了你的眼睛?" 海员有点不信.

   "哎..." 海盗说," 那天是我第一天装铁手."