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(2008-04-24 16:04:02)











Q: You are so right, let’s not forget what’s truly important in life. We have seen some Asian Production Movies, do you like any particulars ones?


A: Ahhh, I like Lust, Caution we saw last year, and the guy played traitor official is so charming! Something is inside his eyes, so many thing told yet untold.


Q: His name is Tony Leung. I remember you mentioned the Japanese actor Ken Watanabe the other day compare with Tony.


A: Yes yes yes! I love them both! They both have strong charisma but vary in the way to express it. Tony has the power in his eyes as if he doesn’t need to propose anything, the women in the movie will fall in love with him and even sacrifice her life for him. As for Watanabe, I felt everything about him says “don’t get close your will get hurt”, however every woman saw him can’t help to. The charm of Asian men, from my very limited experience, comes from the mental power rather than physical power of American men; they have their own world and system to indulge into, so they worry less about the outside world.


Q: Very interesting thought. I hope the Asian men will be flattered by your comments. Now get back to the movies. The movie we saw last week, , I haven’t tell you it was directed by a Chinese director. How do you like it?


A: Oh, that’s why! No wonder I felt estranged by the movie’s setting even the characters speak English and live in New York. I guess it is refreshing to see the usually outspoken and callous New Yorkers to become so vulnerable and shy for a change. A girl lost her boyfriend so she has to get lost before she can find herself back to fall in love again with the character Jude Law plays. Interesting. But you have to understand this is not how Americans deal with relationships. The part confused me the most is when Jude Law kissed the girl when she is asleep. Why would he do that?


Q: Hello! Sleeping Beauty?


A: Yeah, right, but sleeping beauty was born hundreds of years ago, and the girl in the movie is capable of waking up. I mean, if he loves her, why just tell her and ask her to stay, then you guys can kiss?


Q: If he is capable of doing that, the whole story will collapse. More importantly, there are plenty of situations which are not the time to say love.


A: Give me some examples. The girl and the guy were just broke up with their exes, so they are both single, right? Then why not?


Q: Because the girl was not ready to love someone else yet. Beside, the guy didn’t know she would be leaving the next day.


A: Ok, then I guess it’s ok for the guy not to tell her. But why kiss her during her sleep without her consent.


Q: You know at some occasions one can control the words of love, but can’t control the action of love.


A:What if the guy was a freak? When I watching that scene I was wondering why the girl didn’t wake up when the guy kissed her? What if the guy was the bad guy, she could have been molested if she didn’t keep alert on occasions like this.

A: 万一这个男人是个变态呢?当我看到这一幕时,我一直在疑问这个女孩在被吻的时候怎么没醒来?如果这个男人是坏人,而在这样的场合她又不保持清醒的话,那她就很可能会被非礼了。

Q: I believe this is not the case. You know you can’t reason with people in love, things very little just happen, don’t need a cause and don’t need a reaction. It Just happened. At the end the girl responded to his kiss during sleep, then that’s then sign they are in love at the same time at the same place.


A( still a little confused): I see. But again, I never heard of anyone doing that real life. I guess the relationships in real life are fast food.


Q: what’s the real life relationship like in American experiences?


A: From what I know, People have much less time to insatiate with the feelings of love. And in American dating culture, men are much less available than what is representing in the movie. They like to play games and keep a number of candidates in the backyard. They won’t let women know they like you more than what they get back. For example, if a couple had been dating for three weeks, and one night the girl missed the guy and call him up to tell him how much she missed him. Then Boom!
The guy will turn cold in seconds.


Q: Why is that?


A: Because most of the guys only attracted to girls don’t desire them much. And they don’t like talk about feelings or the stories related to feelings. They can spend hours talk about the latest sports car they set eyes on, but they won’t sit there like Jude Law in the movie just to talk about the sad break up stories. Especially hot guys look like Jude Law.


Q: That’s confusing. Then why American girls are buying the crap?


A: Because some of them are silly enough. You know in my home town, the high school girls are very good at playing games, the thought of winning boys makes their small town life less boring. What else you think about when you don’t really have anything to worry about?


Q: The majority of your Home town residents are Republicans, right? I thought republicans are more conservative.


A: we are supposed to, like girls are told by parents not to have sex until sixteen. But who listen to their parents really? And by the time I went to college, my best friend was getting married and having a baby. Then our lives are drifting apart because we went to separate ways. The next thing I know, I haven’t talked to her for a year by now.


Q: What you guys think of abortion? Is it an option?


A: Yes, it is. For me personally, I am pro-choice. I didn’t see the point of having a baby when the girl is not mature enough to even take care of herself. But for some conservative people, it is nothing to blame to have a baby at teen age, but shameful to have an abortion to have the chance to get back the normal life.


Q: I guess the question of “to do or not to do” is a global dilemma, and there are no perfect ways to protect the girls from this life changing accident. Only in China, abortion is a common resort unless the couple is getting married. No girls will ever think about keeping the baby by herself. It is simply implausible.

淇:我想“to do or not to do”是一个全球性的困境吧,在这方面,没有能保护女生的生活不被影响的完美方式。不过在中国,堕胎是一个通常的选择,除非这对恋人决定要结婚。没有女生会想要把孩子生下来自己抚养。这绝对不可行、

A: The cases I know are half by half. What the craziest thing is, a girl I went to high school with became a single mom at the year of graduation, and the next year I went back, she was working as a stripper to support her and her baby!


Q: I don’t know which way is better choice, to be guilty in the rest of your life, and to give up the normal life and do everything at power to support an unexpected child? What is it like in Turkey? I imagine it should be more conservative than China or the US because of the Muslim culture.


A: There are extremes. Some of the Turkish women are very open in sex because of the European influence, and some of them are extremely religious that they can’t have any physical contact with males. And for normal occasions, it would inappropriate for women to walk in the street after certain hours at night.


Q: It’s very interesting to compare the relationship attitude of China, US and Turkey. The big difference of China compare with the other two is that the religious influence is totally absence in Chinese dating culture. In this case, I would say the Chinese youth are the most free of restriction group of the three. And what the free spirit Chinese Youth generation will evolve into in the next 20 years? As a member of the generation, I can’t wait to see.




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