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Dead duck

(2007-07-08 03:36:01)
标签:

幽默英语

英语学习

英译

幽默

趣味英语

分类: 幽默英语
Dead Duck
死鸭子
 
A woman brought her pet duck to the vet, he wasn't moving and lay limply in her arms.

一位女士带她的宠物鸭子看兽医,它一动不动软软地躺在她的手臂上。

 

As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet duck has passed away."

她把她的宠物放在台上,兽医拿出他的听诊器听鸭子的胸部。过了一小会,兽医难过地摇摇头说,“我很遗憾,你的宠物鸭已经死了。”

 

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.

忧伤的主人尖叫,“你肯定吗?”“是的,我肯定。这鸭子死了,”他回答。

 

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any tests or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

“你怎么能这么肯定?”她抗议。“我的意思是你没有做检查或什么的。它可能只是昏迷或其他什么。”

 

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around, left the room, and returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.

兽医转了转眼珠子,转过身,走出了房间,几分钟后带进来一条黑色的拉布拉多犬。

 

As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

在鸭子主人惊奇地注视下,那狗后腿站立,把前爪子扶着检查台,从上到下地闻这只禽鸟。然后它用难过的眼光看着兽医摇了摇头。

 

The vet patted the lab and led it out of the exam room. She still wasn't convinced though.  So, he returned a few moments later with a cat.

兽医拍了拍Lab,将它带出检查室。女士还是不相信。所以,他过了一会儿带回来一只猫。

 

The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head sadly, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

猫跳上台去仔细地从头到脚闻这只禽鸟。猫坐起来,伤心地摇摇它的头,轻轻地叫着,慢慢地走出房间。

 

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." The owner cried softly and accepted the sad news.

兽医看着女士说,“对不起,像我说的一样,的的确确,百分之百可以开证明的,一个死鸭子。”主人低声地哭着接受了这个不幸的消息。

 

Then the vet turned to his computer, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.

然后兽医转向他的计算机,敲了几下键盘打出了一个账单,把它递给女士。

 

The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. She screamed, "£150.00! £150 just to tell me my duck is dead?"

鸭子的主人,依然在震惊之中,接过了账单。她大叫,“150英镑!150英镑就是告诉我我的鸭子死了?”

 

The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been £20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now £150.00."

兽医耸耸肩膀。“对不起。假如你相信了我的话,这账单就只有20英镑,可是有了Lab Report 注1CAT Scan注2,它就是现在的150英镑。”

 

 

注1:Lab report 应该是 laboratory report 的缩写,即:化验报告,化验单。但在这里

     Lab指的是Labrador猎犬。

注2:CAT Scan 又称CT scan (Computed (Axial) Tomography),断层扫描。

     但在这里CAT指的是猫。

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