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Unit TwoThe New Singles (新单身族)

(2008-10-22 00:21:12)
标签:

杂谈

分类: 在职研究生

The New Singles

新单身族

 

Increasing numbers of Northern Europeans are choosing to live alone

越来越多的北欧人选择单身生活

 

1.  You know the type. Eleanor Rigby, who picks up the rice in the church where the wedding has been. Austin Powers, proud owner of a Lava lamp, lush chest hair and an equal-opportunity libido. Bridget Jones, of the wobbly ego and much-watched answering machine. The Single, long a stock figure in stories, songs and personal ads, was traditionally someone at the margins of society: a figure of fun, pity or awe.

你知道他们是这样的人:在举行婚礼的教堂里捡大米的埃莉诺·雷格比;胸毛浓密性欲正常,以拥有熔岩灯商店而感自豪的奥斯丁·鲍威尔斯;个人意识模糊不清、总是期待录音电话响起的布里奇特·琼斯。这些单身们过去一直是故事中、歌曲中和个人广告中的常见人物,传统上这些人处在社会的边缘,滑稽有趣、让人怜悯或令人敬畏。

 

2.  Those days are gone. In the place of withered spinsters and bachelors are people like Elizabeth de Kergorlay, a 29-year-old Parisian banker who views her independence and her own apartment as the spoils of professional success. Scooting around Paris in her Golf GTI, one hand on the wheel and the other clutching her cell phone, de Kergorlay pauses between calls to rave about life alone. “I’m not antisocial,” she says. “I love people. But living alone gives me the time and space for self-reflection. I’ve got the choice and the privacy to grow as a human being.”

那些日子已经一去不复返了。现在的单身族不再像过去面容枯槁的老处女和鳏夫,而是像伊丽莎白·克尔戈莱这样的人。伊丽莎白·克尔戈莱是个29岁的巴黎银行家,她把拥有独立生活和自己的公寓看成是事业成功的结果。她开着漂亮的德国Golf GTI牌小汽车快速地在巴黎兜着风,一手扶着方向盘,另一手抓着手机,在打电话的间歇中热情洋溢地谈论着单身生活。她说:“我不厌恶社交,我喜欢与人交往。但是独自生活使我有时间和空间自我反省。我作为一个人有权选择并不受干扰地成长。”

 

3.  As the sages would say, we are all ultimately alone. But an increasing number of Europeans are choosing to be so at an ever earlier age. This isn’t the stuff of gloomy philosophical meditations, but a fact of Europe’s new economic landscape, embraced by demographers, real-estate developers and ad executives alike. The shift away from family life to solo lifestyles, observes French sociologist Jean-Claude Kaufmann, is part of the “irresistible momentum of individualism” over the last century. The communications revolution, the shift from a business culture of stability to one of mobility and the mass entry of women into the workforce have wreaked havoc on Europeans’ private lives. More and more of them are remaining on their own: they’re living longer, divorcing more and marrying later — if at all. British marriage rates are the lowest in 160 years of records. INSEE, France’s National Institute of Statistics, reports that the number of French people living alone doubled between 1968 and 1990.

 

    正如贤者所言我们最终都将是单独一人。但是越来越多的欧洲人在很年轻的时候就决定过独身生活。这不是悲观的人生思考,而是欧洲经济新气象,它受到人口学家、房地产发展商和广告商这类人的普遍欢迎。法国社会学家让·克劳特·考夫曼评论这种从家庭生活到独身生活模式的过渡是上个世纪不可抗拒的个人主义趋势的组成部分。通信技术的革命、商业文化从稳定性过渡到流动性以及大量的妇女进入产业大军都对欧洲人的私生活产生大冲击。越来越多的欧洲人独自生活:他们寿命更长,离婚更多和结婚更晚——即使他们要结婚的话。英国的结婚率现是160年来的最低的记录。法国国家统计局报道在1968和1990年期间独身的人增长了一倍。

 

4.  The home-alone phenomenon remains an urban and a Northern European trend: people who live in rural areas — as well as Spaniards, Greeks and Irish — tend to stick to families. By contrast, Scandinavians, Dutch and Germans like to live alone: 40 percent of all Swedes live alone, as do seven million Britons — three times as many as 40 years ago. According to the recent report “Britain in 2010” by Richard Scase, professor of organizational behavior at the University of Kent, single-person households will outnumber families and couples within a decade. In London’s tonier neighborhoods like Kensington and Chelsea, about half of all households are people living alone. In Germany this year, 56-year-old divorcee Bernd Klosterfelde produced a CD called “Alone No More.” Featuring 15 tracks of household noises with titles like “Nothing on TV; At Least the Chips Are Good” and “The Fridge Is Finally Full Again,” it promises people who live alone “62 minutes of togetherness.”

   独自生活的现象一直是都市和北欧的趋势:生活在农村的人们——以及西班牙人、希腊人和爱尔兰人——倾向于过家庭生活。与此相反,斯堪的纳维亚人、荷兰人和德国人喜欢独自生活:40%的瑞典人独自生活,七百万英国人独自生活——这是40年前的3倍。根据肯特大学组织行为学的理查德·斯凯斯教授最近的报道――“2010年的英国”,单身家庭数量将会在十年里超过两人以上的家庭。在伦敦肯辛顿和切尔西这样的“贵族”区,大约有一半的房子里住着独自生活的人。今年在德国56岁的伯恩德·克劳斯特费尔德创作了一盘称做“不再孤独”的CD。该光碟的特点是有15段家庭生活的录音,如“电视没什么节目;最起码薯条还是不错的”和“冰箱终于又满了”,它为独自生活的人们提供了“62分钟归属感”。

 

5.  Europe’s new economic climate has largely fostered the trend toward independence. The current generation of home-aloners came of age during Europe’s shift from social democracy to the sharper, more individualistic climate of American-style capitalism. Raised in an era of privatization and increased consumer choice, today’s tech-savvy workers have embraced a free market in love as well as economics. Modern Europeans are rich enough to afford to live alone, and temperamentally independent enough to want to do so. A recent poll by the Institute Francais d’Opinion Publique, the French affiliate of the Gallup poll, found that 58 percent of French respondents viewed living alone as a choice, not an obligation. Other European singles agree. “I’ve always wanted to be free to go on adventures,” says Iris Eppendorf, who lives by herself in Berlin. “I hate dreary, boring, bourgeois living — it’s not interesting.”

欧洲新经济的气候大大地鼓励独立的趋势。当代的独自生活的这一代人的成长时期正是欧洲从社会民主政治过渡到更激烈、更个性化的美国风格的资本主义气候的时期。成长在隐私化和买方市场时代的当今熟谙技术的工人欣然接受自由经济也热情欢迎爱情自由。现代的欧洲人富有,有财力独自生活;他们性格独立,希望独自生活。法国公众民意研究所(盖洛普民意测验法国分部)的最近的调查发现,被提问的法国人中58%认为独自生活是一种选择而不是一种义务。其他欧洲单身族也这样认为。独自住在柏林的艾丽丝·埃彭道夫说“我一直想要自由地去冒险。我讨厌沉闷的、令人厌烦的中产阶级的生活——一点都没意思。”

 

6.  Once upon a time, people who lived alone tended to be those on either side of marriage — twenty-something professionals or widowed senior citizens. While pensioners, particularly elderly women, make up a hefty proportion of those living alone, the newest crop of singles are high earners in their 30s and 40s who increasingly view living alone as a lifestyle choice. “The Swedish word for someone living alone used to be ensam, which had connotations of being lonely,” notes Eva Sandsteadt, author of “Living Alone in Sweden.” “It was conceived as a negative — dark and cold, while being together suggested warmth and light. But then along came the idea of singles. They were young, beautiful, strong! Now, young people want to live alone.”

以前独自生活的人都是一些婚姻之外两端的人们——20多岁的专业人员或寡居的老人。领取养老金的人,特别是上了年纪的妇女,构成了独自生活人中的绝大多数;而新单身族则是30到40岁的高收入人群,他们日益认为独自生活是一种生活方式的选择。《在瑞典独自生活》一书的作者伊娃·桑德斯蒂德说:“瑞典语称一个人独自生活为ensam,含蓄地表明孤独。独自生活被认为是消极的——黑暗、寒冷,而家庭生活则意味着温暖和光明。但是新单身族的观念则不然。他们年轻、美丽、强壮!现在,年轻人希望独自生活。”

 

 

7.  The booming economy means people are working harder than ever. And that doesn’t leave much room for relationships. Pimpi Arroyo, a 35-year-old composer who lives alone in a house in Paris, says he hasn’t got time to get lonely because he has too much work. “I have deadlines which would make life with someone else fairly difficult.” Only an Ideal Woman could make him change his lifestyle, he says. Kaufmann, author of a recent book called “The Single Woman and Prince Charming,” thinks this fierce new individualism means that people expect more and more of mates, so relationships don’t last long — if they start at all. Eppendorf, a blond Berliner with a deep tan and chronic wanderlust, teaches grade school in the mornings. In the afternoon she sunbathes or sleeps, resting up for going dancing. Just shy of 50, she says she’d never have wanted to do what her mother did — give up a career to raise a family. Instead, “I’ve always done what I wanted to do: live a self-determined life.”

繁荣的经济意味着人们比以往任何时候都要更努力工作。这就无法为交往留出很多的空间。35岁的作曲家平庇·阿罗约独自居住在巴黎的一所房子里,说他无暇感到孤独,因为有很多事要做。“我要在期限完成工作,这就使得与他人生活相当难。”他还说只有“理想妻子”才能改变他的生活模式。最近出版的“单身女人和白马王子”一书的作者考夫曼认为这种狂热的新个人主义意味着人们对配偶期望越来越多,因此相互之间的关系持续不长——如果开始交往。埃彭道夫是个金发碧眼柏林女人,有着晒成褐色皮肤,嗜好旅行。她上午在小学教书,下午则去日光浴或睡觉,彻底地休息后去跳舞。她还不到50岁,她说她从未想过要象母亲那样生活——放弃事业,照看家庭。而“我一直在做我想要做的事:过自己选择的生活。”

 

 

8.  A self-determined life doesn’t come cheap. In capitals like Stockholm, Rome or Berlin, high rents mean that only big earners can afford their own housing. Proportionally, more professionals live alone: in France, one in five career women live alone, compared with one in ten working women. The French government recently allotted nearly 77 million francs to people in their early 20s who wanted to move away from home, but couldn’t afford to. Parisian banker de Kergorlay’s apartment allows her the luxury of being able to “read, cook, write and entertain without having to make compromises.”

过自己选择的生活一点也不便宜。在像斯德哥尔摩、罗马或柏林这样的首都城市房租很高,这意味着只有高工资的人才付得起自己的住房。按比例来算,更多的专业人员独自生活:在法国五分之一的职业妇女独自生活,而在蓝领工作妇女中的比例则是十分之一。法国政府最近为那些二十多岁想搬出去住但又负担不起的年轻人拨款七千七百万法郎。巴黎的银行家克尔戈莱的公寓使她能十分舒适地“无拘无束地读书、煮饭、写作和娱乐”。

 

9.  Such freedom can be addictive, particularly for women, notes sociologist Kaufmann. “Women are still expected to be the housewife in couples,” he notes. “It’s very hard for women to fight against this idea, so the only way they can attain sexual equality is to live alone.” De Kergorlay hasn’t ruled out marriage, but wouldn’t give up her freedom for a man. “If I were to get married,” she explains, “I would still want my own room — an escape zone where I can be by myself.”

社会学家考夫曼提到这种自由会令人上瘾,特别令妇女上瘾。他说“在夫妇中人们依然期待妇女成为家庭主妇。妇女与这种观念斗争是非常困难,所以她们能获取男女平等的唯一方法就是独自生活。”克尔戈莱并不排除结婚的可能性,但是她不会为了一个男人而放弃自己的自由。她解释说:“如果我要结婚,我仍要自己的房间——一个属于我自己的自由空间。”  

 

 

10. Millions of singles yearning for escape zones or solitude are straining Europe’s city housing market. Over the next 15 years, the British population is set to decline, but the number of houses will rise by 25 percent — an increase largely accounted for by single people. Southeastern England is undergoing a major building boom: the British government has authorized the construction of 860,000 new homes, mostly for the middle classes. Real-estate brokers note a rise in the number of young singles who work mad hours and treat their homes like dorms. In London, luxury complexes with tiny flats, gyms and easy access to urban pleasures are springing up for young and driven professionals. Single-person households promote gentrification: when singles move into the neighborhood, say geographers, latte bars, gyms and restaurants are sure to follow, and local music, theater and art galleries thrive. “Singles are a real benefit to French cultural life,” says Olivier Donna, of the French Ministry of Culture and Communications. “Without them, you are left with couples and families who prefer to stay at home and watch TV.”

数百万的向往自由空间或喜欢独居的单身族使得欧洲房地产很紧张。在未来15年里英国的人口将会下降,但房屋的数量将会增长25%——这增长主要来自单身族的需求。英格兰的东南部正经历主要的建房热:英国政府已授权建造860,000所新住宅,主要是为中产阶级而建。房地产经纪人注意到年轻单身族人数的上涨,这些人工作起来很疯狂并把家当成宿舍。在伦敦,为年轻人和有压力的专业人员建造的带有小套公寓、健身馆,交通方便能享受都市娱乐的豪华的综合楼群正在拔地而起。单身住房促进了地区贵族化:地理学者说当单身族搬进邻近地区,咖啡酒吧、健身馆和饭店就一定会跟进来,当地的音乐、剧院和艺术馆就会繁荣。“单身族对法国的文化生活带来了真正的好处,”法国文化和通信部的奥利弗·唐娜说道。“没有他们,那就剩下只愿呆在家里看电视的夫妇和家庭。”

 

 

11. Women, it seems, enjoy singledom more than men do. According to Scase, single women — unlike men — tend to live near single friends, forming networks that serve as neo-families. Restaurants, gyms and latte bars function as living rooms, as do pubs — a trend that’s made young urban women a mainstay for the British drinks industry over the past five years. By contrast, the bachelor tends to stay in. “The man who lives alone is very much the sad case,” says Scase. “They really do watch videos and drink beer.”

 

   妇女好象比男人更会享受单身生活。根据斯凯斯的观点单身女人——与男人不同——倾向于住在单身朋友附近,形成新型家庭般的朋友圈。饭店、健身馆和咖啡酒吧就像酒馆一样起到客厅的作用——这种趋势使得都市妇女在过去的五年里成了英国酒业的主要支柱。相反单身汉则倾向于呆在家里。斯凯斯说:“独自生活的男人是非常悲哀的。他们确实在看录像和喝啤酒。”

 

12. For some young urbanites, renting “The Matrix” and reaching for a lager is a much-needed escape — particularly for those in New Economy careers like media, advertising or information technology. “My whole job is communicating,” says Katherine Edwards, whose job as public-affairs manager for the British supermarket chain Tesco takes her out to parties and dinners a couple of times a week. “The last thing I want to do when I come home is communicate.” For Richard Moore, managing director of a sport-promotions company, his 1870s south London house is a refuge from work. The peace and quiet is such a luxury, says Moore, that “I’ll live alone until I meet the girl I’m going to marry.”

对某些都市年轻人来说,租住“梅特里克斯”公寓,喝着啤酒是一种十分必要的逃避——特别是对于那些拥有与新经济职业有关的人,如:媒体、广告或信息技术这类职业。“我的工作就是交际,”凯瑟琳·爱德华说道。作为英国超级市场特斯科分部公共事务部经理,工作使她每周都有一两次的社交和宴请。“当我回到家后,最不愿意做的事就是交际。”体育促销公司执行董事理查德·穆尔把伦敦南区建于19世纪70年代的老房子当成逃逸工作的避难所。穆尔说平静和安宁是如此难得,“我要独自生活直到遇上我意中的女孩。”

 

13. Living alone doesn’t mean living without romance. Jan Trost, a sociologist at the University of Uppsala, has studied Europe’s rising incidence of what he calls LAT, or living alone together, in which committed couples opt for separate residences. In an increasingly mobile work culture, professionals often work in separate cities or even countries, using e-mail, phones and meetings on weekends to sustain relationships. Married types who have bickered once too often about toothpaste caps or dust bunnies are opting to live apart in peace rather than together in stress. And divorced or widowed people who hook up later in life tend to have set ways and long personal histories with the requisite complications: “Should my piano or your piano be the piano?” says Trost, imagining a hypothetical discussion. “And photos: my grandchildren or yours? It’s simpler to keep your own house.”

   独自生活并不是指生活中就没有浪漫。乌普萨拉大学的社会学家简·特罗斯特研究了欧洲出现的越来越多的一起而又独自生活的LAT现象,也就是:决定在一起生活的双方倾向于分开居住。在工作流动性越来越大的社会里,专业人员经常在不同的城市里或甚至在不同的国家工作,他们利用电子邮件、电话和周末见面来维持关系。那些曾经常为牙膏盖子或沾满灰尘的兔子等这类琐事争吵的已婚男女,倾向于和和气气地分开居住,而不是关系紧张地住在一起。在晚年又与他人合聚的那些离婚的或失偶的人往往有自己的固定的生活方式和长期形成的复杂的个人需求。特罗斯特在假设他们讨论的问题时说:“‘是留下我的钢琴还是留下你的钢琴?’‘是把我孙子和孙女的照片挂起来还是挂你的?’保留自己的房子则更简单。”

 

 

14. The move from cozy families to urban singledom opens new vistas for marketers. In the past, the holy grail for advertisers was the couple with 2.3 children. No longer, argues Scase. Today’s companies should think of high-earning singles as a key market. Gone are the days of the clamorous family gathered around a table groaning with home-cooked food. A third of Britons eat dinner alone at least four times a week — and prefer eating alone to eating with others, according to a British National Opinion Poll. Small wonder that Britain’s market for ready-made convenience foods has doubled in the last five years.

搬出舒适的家到都市独自生活为商家提供了新的前景。过去,广告商最看重的是有两三个孩子的夫妇。斯凯斯说情况不再是这样了。当今的企业应该把高收入的单身族当成重要的市场。吵吵嚷嚷的一家围坐在饭桌边咂着嘴吃着自家做的饭的日子已经一去不复返了。英国人中有三分之一的人每周四次独自吃饭——根据英国国家民意调查,他们更喜欢独自吃饭而不是与人一同吃。怪不得英国市场的便利熟食在过去五年里增长了一倍。

 

 

15. A host of other singles services have sprung up, from dogwalkers to alarm systems to agencies that will water your plants or bring you aspirin and coffee when you’re hung over. Compact cars and mobile phones, the major props of modern European city life, have solid markets among European singles. Bouygues Telecom / France Telecom estimates that a hefty percentage of cell-phone users are young home-aloners; a quarter of Smart cars, tiny vehicles designed for city driving, are sold to twenty- and thirty-something singles who “churn” or change partners instead of settling down. It’s a marketing man’s dream: a demographic with the anxieties of teenagers and the bank accounts of the middle-aged. Instead of saving for their kids’ college education, the home-aloners are prepared to fork out on personal-fitness trainers, seaweed cellulite wraps and stiletto heels. “You have to be concerned about presenting yourself if you live in a more mobile society,” says Scase. “Appearance is no longer a young person’s concern. And [singles] have the money to spend on it.”

其它一系列为单身服务的项目也涌现出来,从带狗散步,警报系统到为你浇花或在你宿醉时给你送阿司匹林和咖啡的服务机构。小型汽车、移动电话这类欧洲都市生活的主要工具,在欧洲单身中拥有稳定的市场。博格斯电信和法国电信估计使用移动电话的人中绝大多数是独自生活的年轻人。史马特车——为都市设计的小汽车——四分之一是卖给那些经常改变伴侣而不安家的20和30来岁的单身。销售商的梦想是:具有十来岁孩子的渴望又有中年人的银行帐户的群体。独自生活的人们不必为孩子上大学而储蓄,他们准备为个人健康教练、海藻脂肪膜和高跟鞋支付款项。斯凯斯说:“如果你居住在移动性较大的社会,你就要关心展现自我。”“外表不再是只有年轻人才关心的事了。单身族在这上面花得起。”

 

 

16. Living alone may bring freedom, but not necessarily buoyant health or better sex. A recent Dutch study of 19,000 people found chronic disease was 30 percent higher among singles. “Married people are healthier,” says the University of Rotterdam’s Inez Joung, who conducted the study. “They smoke and drink less. Single and divorced people are more likely to commit suicide and have liver disease, diabetes or lung cancer.” The playboy magazine promise of singledom as a portal to sublime sex doesn’t hold, according to Hamburg University sexologist Gunter Schmidt. Having studied the sex lives of 3,000 young Germans, he estimates that 90 percent of all heterosexual sex occurs in long-term relationships. Half of the young singles surveyed weren’t having any sex at all. And good sex, according to Schmidt, pretty much remains the privilege of the attached: only 40 percent of singles said they enjoyed sex, compared with 80 percent of people in relationships. “The sexual world of singles is rather gray,” says Schmidt. “They make a huge effort to produce a little sex that’s not even satisfying.”

独自生活会带来自由,但是并不一定会带来轻松愉快的健康或更好的性生活。最近荷兰对19,000人的研究表明,单身族中患慢性病要高于30%。从事该项研究的鹿特丹大学的伊内兹·荣格说:“结婚的人更健康,他们较少喝酒、抽烟。单身和离了婚的人更有可能会自杀,更可能会患有肝病、糖尿病或肺癌。”根据汉堡大学性科学专家冈特·施密特的观点,花花公子杂志认为的单身是通向崇高性生活的途径的看法是不成立的。冈特·施密特研究了3,000名德国年轻人的性生活,评价道90%的异性恋的性生活基于长期的关系。有一半受调查的单身根本就没有性生活。根据施密特的调查,好的性生活相当多地保持在相互喜爱的人中:只有40%的单身说他们享受性生活,而有长期异性关系的群体则是80%。“单身的性世界是暗淡的,”施密特说道。“他们非常努力地过一点点但又不能令人满意的性生活。”

 

 

17. Life can get even tougher as home-aloners age. Once retired, work’s not there to provide a steady income or social life. Bad health and fear of crime can turn freedom into frightening solitude. In Sweden, groups of individuals have started about 50 co-housing projects designed for singles or couples in the second half of their lives. At Fardknappen, a state-built group home in Stockholm for people “in the second half of life,” the feel is less that of an old person’s home than a college dorm, with its buzzing modems, cheeky political cartoons and blue-jeaned, sandal-shod residents. Nightly group dinners aren’t mandatory, though people do have to pitch in and cook for a week every two months. And they’re worth going to, to hear Fardknappen’s 55 residents buzz with tales of recent trips to jazz clubs, to Cuba and South India.

当独身者上了年纪,生活就更艰难了。一旦他们退休,就没有工作来提供稳定的收入或社交生活。不健康的身体和对犯罪的担心会使得自由变成令人恐惧的孤独。在瑞典,一些群体发起了为单身或夫妇后半生而设计的50项合住工程。在国家拨款修建的位于斯德哥尔摩的费德克纳蓬“后半生”集体住宅里,感觉上不象老人院,而像大学宿舍,这有带有嗡嗡作响的调制解调器、厚颜无耻的政治人物的漫画和穿着蓝色牛仔和凉鞋的居民。虽然每隔两月人们确实要花上一周积极地投入炊事准备,但集体晚餐并不是强制的。但很值得去,听听费德克纳蓬的55位居民吵吵嚷嚷地谈论着最近去爵士俱乐部、去古巴和印度南部的故事。

 

 

18.The fusion of independence and community for older people has proved popular: the seventy-year old group has waiting list of 75, and visitors from Japan and the United States tramp through to learn about the Swedish method of aging gracefully. “Living like this enables old people to have freedom,” explains Mette Kjorstad, a divorcee who moved to Fardknappen after her two kids left home. “And it’s a great relief for people’s children — they’re free of a lot of guilt.” Guilt-free families? Now that’s a sign of a seismic societal shift if ever there was one.

将自立融入老年社区已被证明很受欢迎:70岁的老人组有一份75人等候加入的名单,长途跋涉的日本和美国的访客要了解瑞典的体面养老方法。“这样生活使得老人有自由,”梅特·基约斯塔德解释道。梅特·基约斯塔德离了婚,在她的两个孩子离家后住进了费德克纳蓬。 “对老人的子女来说是很大的宽慰——他们不会感到内疚。”存在没有内疚的家庭吗?如果家庭里存在内疚的话,现在这就是一个巨大的社会变革。

 

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