• 博客等级:
  • 博客积分:0
  • 博客访问:14,523
  • 关注人气:0
  • 获赠金笔:0支
  • 赠出金笔:0支
  • 荣誉徽章:
正文 字体大小:

Here I am

(2007-05-21 09:20:21)







分类: 情感点滴
                            Here I am
——Dusky 07.05.17 21:30
    So, here I am, seated down on the 4th floor of library all by myself, looking at my own books, surrounded by at least 100 persons who are just like me.
    I know in Behang University, such a high school of engineering with an extreme imbalance between the numbers of girls and boys, it is not easy for a boy to find a suitable girlfriend. 10 thousand or even more of my school mates and millions of persons in the same age of me, I think, alone in their dormitories and classrooms, some of them liking it that way and some of them not. But I know single may be a “popular disease” here, and it became less embarrassing for us to admit than any other faults. Sometimes, people here are even proud to allege that they have no girlfriends but brethren.
    Nearly half of my college time has passed, I am still waking followed only by my own shadow, reading in the study-room, shopping in the supermarket, playing basketball on the playground, programming in the computer-room. Maybe someone is veracious when he speaks highly of loneness, but who are not willing to be accompanied with a beloved? I understand nothing can be importuned for, but I long for a true love just like most people, too.
    From time to time, I insensibly imagine promenading through the Green-Garden with our hand in hand on a still star-spangled night. Imagine leaning my head on her shoulder and closing my eyes to smell her fragrant black long hear in a cinema. Imagine taking off my frock and put it on her body on a cold rainy afternoon. Imagine laughing and chasing in a sunshine morning, Imagine staying up late together in nightlong studying room before an exam…
    Yes, I am an emotional animal. So I know all of that, wander for that,eager for that. So sometimes I find it's hard to get power from myself and dominated by mood.But I am also a man, I need a love so that I am still in solitude. A real supreme beautiful love needs staying rational as well as having passion. Sometimes I feel sorry for seeing those princes charming to flatter “dinosaur-princesses”. Sometimes I thought it’s a pity for those pairs who are excessively wasting their precious college time. Sometimes I feel boring to hear others’ coupling and splitting.
    I’d like to lower my head thinking of problems than look around to find beauties in frond of a lift. I’d like to fill my ears with earphone and listen to music rather than envy those sweet pairs passing by. I’d like to stay in library and dedicate myself into pabulum rather than talk about others’ love story with friends in dorm.
    No doubt about it, solitude is improved by being voluntary. Just like someone said that no companion can be as companionable as solitude.
    Consider of those famous great fictionist, inventor and ideologist in history for instance. Choose to be alone on purpose, having rejected company rather than been cast out by it, is one common characteristic of them. Newton, Vinci, Copernicus, Nietzsche, Goethe, Andersen, Plato…they all never got married whole the life. Solitary didn’t bring them loneness but time for them to think without being disturbed by the noisy outside and the inspiration for them to consider and compose.
    Yes, here I am, only by myself. It may not be what I expected to be, but for the time being I might as well accept it just as the only way that I will have to pass by when growing up. Anyway, that is God’s business to decide which person I shall meet with on my road.
    What I need to do now is just bending my head over my study. I know my girl need a splendid boy just like what I wander her should be. But not like an arrogant self-centered person or those who are shy away from others because of self-contempt. Stop seeking, no envying, never feel anxious. Settle down and make myself cheerful, at east temporarily, I know I still have a lot of grace and pleasure coming from the very bottom of my heart in such condition.
    In this college, just like a big castle of knowledge, I just want to be a patient “Sleeping Handsome” sealed up in a tower, waiting for the appearance of my girl. Wait for the unique, gorgeous, virtuous-hearted and bright one who is fated to be my princess in destiny to wake me up.
    However, I will always believe the happy ending to my and her fairy tale.

                                           ——守望之刃 07.05.17 21:30


阅读 评论 收藏 转载 喜欢 打印举报/Report
  • 评论加载中,请稍候...



    < 前一篇十渡之游
    后一篇 >5月22日

    新浪BLOG意见反馈留言板 欢迎批评指正

    新浪简介 | About Sina | 广告服务 | 联系我们 | 招聘信息 | 网站律师 | SINA English | 会员注册 | 产品答疑

    新浪公司 版权所有