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爸爸的小女儿

(2006-04-02 21:18:27)
送给我的每个学生,和所有正在想念某人的朋友们
 

 

听“爸爸的小女儿”这首歌,我感到里面的每字每句都和我息息相关。爸爸对我的一生有着重大的影响。除了教诲我树立良好的职业道德,在音乐方面他也熏陶着我———教会我弹吉他。但尽管在我这个童年时代以及现在我们所处的亲密无间,爸爸从未真正得以身体语言来表达他对我的疼爱。对于一个曾经是缅因州人的来说,流露真情和拥抱决不是件容易的事。他习惯把父爱通过勤奋工作的方式表达出来,激励我端正人品,让我衣食无忧。

但在1997612日那天,一切都改变了。TNN电视台安排我那天在“美国黄金时段”做父亲节的演出。制片还邀请了爸爸和我一道参加该节目。我被要求演唱“爸爸的小女儿”这支歌,然后按常规和爸爸接受加利。查普曼的采访。我觉得采访这一段根本不成什么问题,因为我想当健谈!不料演出那环节却让我极为紧张不安———不仅因为要第一次在爸爸面前开口唱歌,而且还因为我们最后一次拥抱着说“我爱你”已是十六年前的事了。

那一刻终于到了。离我开始表演还有三十秒钟,我从帷幕后走出来站到舞台中间,就在观众席的最前排,坐着我的爸爸。

钢琴的前奏响起,我看到爸爸正在强忍着眼泪。职业习惯告诉我,要坚强,要超越个人感情,但我走不到!唱着唱着,我心潮澎湃不已。霎那间,我失声哭泣,边唱边哽咽不已。当唱到最后一句时,我看见爸爸已是泪流成河。我的感情决了堤。我步入观众席中投入爸爸的怀抱,唱完了这首歌。

这么多年我和父亲没有说过一句“我爱你”,没有拥抱过一回,但那晚在全国无数电视观众的面前,在那难能可贵的一刻内,一切都得到了补偿。

 

Daddy’s Little Girl

When I heard the song “Daddy’s Little Girl,” every line in the lyrics related to me. Daddy was a very big influence in my life. Besides teaching me a good work ethic, he also influenced me musically --- he taught me how to play the guitar. In spite of our closeness throughout my childhood and in our relationship today, Daddy never really showed a lot of physical affection towards me. You see Daddy was a former Marine, showing emotion and hugging was never something that came easy to him. He always demonstrated his love by working hard, giving me encouragement to be a good person and just providing for me.

All that changed the night of June 12, 1997. I was scheduled to do a Father’s Day show on TNN”s PRIMETIME COUNTRY, and the producers wanted my father to be a part of the program. They had asked me to sing my song, “Daddy’s Little Girl,” and then do the normal interview portion with Gary Chapman and my dad. The interview segment was going to be a piece of cake, I thought, because I love to talk! However, the performance portion was creating some real anxiety for me not only because it would be the first time for me to sing the song in front of my father, but sixteen years had passed since the last time he and I had hugged or even said, “ I love you.”

So the big moment finally arrived. With just thirty seconds until I had to perform, I stepped from behind the curtain and onto the stage. There, in the front row of the auditorium, sat my dad.

As the piano intro started, I could tell Daddy was fighting back the tears. I felt the professional thing to do was be tough and try to rise above the emotion I was feeling, but there was simply no way! The more I sang, the more sensitive I became. Overwhelmed, I heard my voice start cracking while uncontrollable sobs accompanied each line. As I got ready to sing the last verse, I saw that Daddy had tears streaming down his face. And I just lost it! I walked into the audience to share Daddy’s embrace as I sang through the ending of the song.

And those years without an “I love you” or a hug were all redeemed for us that night right there on national TV as millions of viewers shared that priceless moment.

 

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